Caesarean is the only surgery where seven layers of tissue are opened and the mother is expected to stand up six hours later, taking responsibility for one more person, not to mention the intense uterus contractions, product of the Stimulation of mammary glands, release of oxytocin… etc.
If you’re a mother via cesarean, you’re stronger than you think. Be proud of yourself. 💕
Little girls are constantly accessing their surroundings . Eyes , ears, hands , smell etc they are using all sensory from birth .
It is said that boys are more motor and physical and are not accessing their surroundings .
And then there is the super hyper sensitivity factor and many more babies have this extra ordinary sensitivity.
According to the accompanying script, this is the youngest mother in history; age 9
I met a gal in her early 40s , 1st and only baby and Dr had her on Topamax Baby was born and died at birth .
www.madinamerica.com/2022/10/health-risks-babies-antidepressants/
The advice from Dr Spock was to let baby cry up to 15 minutes . I tried this not knowing these horrific results .
There have been many advisors promoting detached parenting which is NOT what babies or children need not deserve .
Single Married Mama who had to be in the glow with a partner who had no idea or interest in parenting . Comfortable with brotherhood or uncle status that did not teach our sons well .
I regret not stopping everything to hold my baby , co sleep and had better intuitive skills that would have not allowed our sons to be alone with certain energies who masked many secrets
Crying it out: the foundation for NPD and BPD
(Borderline Personality Disorder
and Narcissistic Personality Disorder)
“One of the ways children have to adjust to a new order is called ‘letting them cry themselves out’.
The Mother puts the child into the crib at night to sleep. It is bedtime. But the sense of aloneness and the loss of contact with the mothers body terrifies the child, who begins to scream and cry.
No animal mother would fail to respond to a baby’s cry. Some human mothers believe, however that to respond would be wrong.
To give in to a child’s crying will spoil the child.
Besides, they have been told, crying is good for a child…
The first time this happens the child might cry for hours before falling asleep.
The mother might think the child has learned a lesson, but, the child doesn’t have the energy for a repeat performance…
After several experiences of this kind, the child learns to give up the struggle for contact with the mother. In effect, the child has cut off the longing for his contact and so no longer feels the pain of frustration.
A new reality in which the desire for intimacy and closeness is not expressed, has been accepted.
The foundations for narcissism and the borderline personality have been laid.”
Alexander Lowen,
Narcissism, Denial of True Self
“They tell us how to grow a baby. What to eat.
What not to eat. What vitamins to take and what bras to buy. Allll the prenatal yoga moves to do.
But they forget to tell us how to put ourselves back together once that baby is born.
They forget to tell us how we might feel like we’re drifting.
Afloat. Alone. On a life raft with leaky breasts and sore stitches and a tiny little being dependent upon us for survival.
They forget to tell us how weird and wild it feels to have loose organs shifting about inside of us. How there will be so much softness still.
I get it. You don’t want to startle us. You don’t want us to be scared about what’s ahead.
But….a little heads up would be helpful
We’re brave enough for the truth.
And those things you find so scary- loose skin and leaky breasts and big feelings- we might just be bold enough to welcome them.
To see the beauty there.
So here’s the truth mama-
Your pelvic floor will probably need work and attention. You’ll have to put in some effort to regain that muscle strength, no matter how gentle your birth. Your breasts and belly will probably never be the same. Love them anyway. Love than more than before!! Celebrate them! Buy bras that make you feel sexy. Then move on.
Your identity and sense of self will change radically. Buckle up for the ride. You’ve got this. Your partnership and friendships and general relationship with the outside world might feel foreign for awhile. Or forever. Those relationships might crack and break under the weight of new parenthood. Live your truth. Leave the rest behind. In love.
The whole world might feel shaken up.
You’ll probably feel shaky and raw
That’s normal (they just forgot to tell you.)
You’re new here. In this skin. In this role. In this love. You’ll find your way. You’ll find your rhythm. It will all fall into place- with time.
Until then- breathe.
As deeply as you can.
Drink your tea before it gets cold.
If you can.
Rest –
whenever you can.
And love on your new self.
As deeply as you can.”
#repost @spiritysol ❤️
They did not warn about being single mothers within a marriage ; single wives …..
“They told you about the contractions but did they tell you about the expansion?
Did they tell you how your body would open to make way for the whole universe to pass through?
Did they tell you how your heart would explode with a love bigger than anything you’ve ever known as you pulled your baby to your chest
They told you about the ring of fire but did they tell you about the crown of stars?
Did they mention that there is a moment when your baby enters the world and you leave your body and touch the heavens and become the light of a million galaxies?
Did they tell you how the pain of stretching to receive your child would be more exquisite than any sensation you’ve felt?
They told you you would scream but did they tell you about how you would roar?
Did they tell you about the power that would rise up from your belly as you called your baby forth with your mighty voice?
Did they tell you how you would embody the wild woman within you and breathe fire with your song?
They told you you would bleed but did they tell you how that sacred blood wouldn’t scare you?
How you would feel grateful for that magical liquid of life as it trickled down your leg?
How you would honor its flow and how it would help you heal a lifetime of hating your body’s bleeding cycles?
They told you these stories and taught you to fear birth, to fear your power, to fear yourself.
But you’re stronger and wiser than that mama.
You know that birth is your divine dance, your soul’s song, your moment with God, and you walk fearlessly into her open arms.”
~ Catie Atkinson
https://m.facebook.com/spiritysol/
@spiritysoul on Instagram
Art: Medha Srivastava, “Motherlove”
https://www.facebook.com/medhasrivastavaa/
#SacredSistersFullMoonCircle #Spirituality. #WomensWisdom #WomensEmpowerment #RedTent #SacredFeminine #Goddess #GoddessCircle #WheeloftheYear #Mythology #Magick #FolkTradition #GivingBirth #Birth #Childbirth #SeasonoftheMother #GodtheMother
Hold the mother, not the baby.
Because the baby’s being taken care of—
fed, snuggled, and given all the love in the world—
by not only the mother,
but her partner, grandparents, siblings, cousins, and friends.
But the mother,
may have gaps in her mind from lack of sleep,
may be mechanical in her motions as she’s healing,
may feel more like a mess than a mother,
may be sitting in bed, crying, feeling overwhelmed in her body and life,
may be full of mom guilt because in her mind, “she’s not good enough,”
and she’s bleeding, wincing in pain, swollen and emotional.
And the mother’s that baby’s whole world and needs to be seen, so she doesn’t disappear into that postpartum fog.
So, hold the mother, not the baby.
A mother agrees that her baby matters more.
But she’s hurting, while she’s the person behind the baby,
in the background, making it all happen:
feeding her baby at all hours,
snuggling her baby close to comfort newborn cries,
and being that baby’s everything.
So, it’s the mother who needs your love.
And a mother will remember who held her up.
So instead of “I’m coming to see the baby,”
try saying, “I’m coming to see you 𝘢𝘯𝘥 meet the baby, too.”
Because the mother needs to be held more.
📸: This Mama Doodles
……………………………………………..
My Children’s Book 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘖𝘬𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘖𝘬𝘢𝘺: 𝘈𝘥𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘴 𝘎𝘦𝘵 𝘉𝘪𝘨 𝘍𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘛𝘰𝘰 is out everywhere: https://amzn.to/317TvVc
The education I received , perhaps through Dr Spock was to allow baby cry up to 15 minutes . I am not sure if I allowed 15 minutes but I disregarded my gut too much with regard to our sons. If I asked , the Dr etc he trusted my intuition and he was misinformed through his education which has been lacking in authentic knowledge . And allowing for new information, growth and change that are fact .
Another news flash for me was the universal cry sounds of babies that are specific .
I felt I had way too much to do ,being responsible and pleasing others to sit with my infant in my arms but I talked to them , acknowledged them as our family grew . I had few outlets ; walking was therapeutic but waxed and waned .
I am sure I was not held for my Mom was never demonstrative , tender or nurturing in my memories . I have knowledge of whys she may have been with holding and marriage to that same energy within a sacred union with children involved was devastating.
Their love was so healing and highlighted the lacks of love by others especially their Dad .
And he weaponized that love to advantage himself .
I enjoy sacred hugs but am touched by many in my life without physical contact .
I feel held
I feel supported
I feel loved 🥰
GreatCosmicMothersUnite 