Tag: marriage

Mother in Law

The war never ended from her possession of her son . I gave up after years of trying ; once sitting with her and stating that it was ok if she didn’t care for me , that we could have some semblance of a relationship. She replied ” as a Christian, I’ve never met anyone that I didn’t like ” .

I understood her from that point on and witnessed her get hands on and loving towards our sons when someone was watching .

She was abusive to me openly and it was witnessed and he said nothing in my defense for it was very uncalled for .

I watched her smack at her 90 year old Mother’s hands for getting flour on the floor when making biscuits!

I believe her eldest children experienced a lot of trauma at her hands and he alluded to my having no idea .

I believe he found his Dad weak to her as she called him Mr _____ and he allowed her to rule . As he faded out , she lamented the place’s they would not be able to travel and her health challenges but how she couldn’t do her thing for taking care of him . His obit declared her a Daughter of the Eastern Star and he a 32nd degree Mason which I was unaware of ! Why the secret ?

She talked so sweetly to her daughters and never once had that tone with me .

Inviting her and sister in law to cook outs at our home stopped when the 4 huddled in one area as if too good to mingle with my parents.

My Mom’s Mom died close to Thanksgiving and we were eating at her house and as she said the prayer my Mom began to cry and had to leave the table , which was met with shame from her and I was so stunned I just sat there .

So as his partner and confidant I was used as leverage and as his ” crazy” drugged and vulnerable wife whom he just offered was sick or didn’t want to attend a family function , when he was ready to jump in with the new supply, she was totally supportive and our sons became possessions that could not betray her or their Dad by being in anyway supportive or compassionate toward me .

Mother in laws , aunts and wives have assumed the mother toll, discouraging any healing or connection with me as they admire her wealth and longevity. She is quite an artist and I’ve been told of her abuse towards our sons that was uncalled for .

I’m sure she feels she has a place in Heaven but to me she is demonic and hides under her know it all attitude and money/power .

I long ago allowed her to know I was not impressed and found the bond between she and her son unholy . He’s attached to her so deeply and it proved to destroy his relationship with his twin , another 20 years of leveraging a woman to get Mom’s favor and execute her finances !

God only knows what he’s pocketed , for anything he touches and wants belongs to him .

What a house of cards !!!

Mother In Law – Ted Talks

youtube.com/watch

2000 or so My distorted body on Psychiatric RX , blank eyes

A marriage , a grandson , were weaponized to block me after I failed to be able to help with childcare ; I was DOA .

It’s very sad to know and accept that our sons would prefer my death and that hasn’t changed in 20 years .

It’s easier

Crying

The advice from Dr Spock was to let baby cry up to 15 minutes . I tried this not knowing these horrific results .

There have been many advisors promoting detached parenting which is NOT what babies or children need not deserve .

Single Married Mama who had to be in the glow with a partner who had no idea or interest in parenting . Comfortable with brotherhood or uncle status that did not teach our sons well .

I regret not stopping everything to hold my baby , co sleep and had better intuitive skills that would have not allowed our sons to be alone with certain energies who masked many secrets

Crying it out: the foundation for NPD and BPD

(Borderline Personality Disorder

and Narcissistic Personality Disorder)

“One of the ways children have to adjust to a new order is called ‘letting them cry themselves out’.

The Mother puts the child into the crib at night to sleep. It is bedtime. But the sense of aloneness and the loss of contact with the mothers body terrifies the child, who begins to scream and cry.

No animal mother would fail to respond to a baby’s cry. Some human mothers believe, however that to respond would be wrong.

To give in to a child’s crying will spoil the child.

Besides, they have been told, crying is good for a child…

The first time this happens the child might cry for hours before falling asleep.

The mother might think the child has learned a lesson, but, the child doesn’t have the energy for a repeat performance…

After several experiences of this kind, the child learns to give up the struggle for contact with the mother. In effect, the child has cut off the longing for his contact and so no longer feels the pain of frustration.

A new reality in which the desire for intimacy and closeness is not expressed, has been accepted.

The foundations for narcissism and the borderline personality have been laid.”

Alexander Lowen,

Narcissism, Denial of True Self

To Be A Mom

Many are single married Mothers , with a drop in Dad who friends their child and creates the Mom who must delegate thus coming off as doctoral .

To be a Mom.

A Mom will break her own heart in pieces and glue those pieces into your heart that is broken.

She will tie your hair (im)patiently and run back to fetch your favourite toy, even if it makes her late.

She will pull the feathers from her wings and lovingly add them to yours just to make sure that you can fly higher.

She will use her last bit of energy at the end of a long day to wipe the tears from your sad face.

A Mom is thè one person that will always see the beauty within you.

She is thè one person that will believe you deserve only the best and bend backwards to ensure that you get it.

To be a Mom is to understand that at times, she will have to stand alone against the world.

I only realize now why Cinderella’s stepmom was so nasty and Mama Bear’s porridge was always cold.

I only realize now why Snowhite was alone in the woods and why Little Red Riding Hood’s granny so grey, old and sick.

Because the days of Motherhood were just too long and the years much too short.

And many, yes MANY days, a Mom’s plate of food is just too cold too often.

Luckily there are silver linings, especially around much darker clouds,

on days you need to see that silver lining the most.

The reward of being a Mom can be found in listening to the most precious of precious laughter of your child, sounding like water gently gurgling over smooth river stones.

It is in the privilege of hearing a little human that you helped bring into this world, say: “Mama, I’s loves you..” and you know it comes from their tiny heart.

I believe that you only grasp the true value of a Mom, the day you become a Mom yourself.

It is only then that you realize the power in a Mom’s prayers.

At times the title Mom also brings the deepest of hurt and pain.

But let’s be honest – to have a Mom and to be a Mom, is the highest privilege anyone can be blessed with.

🖋️~ Unknown, shared via Welcome Home pg.

*** Written by a mom for moms, but reading it, I know so many millions of Moms have an amazing, supportive Dad beside them. I honour you both. 💜

Art Credit : Artist unknown, published by Heidi @Parenting to Impress.

The Collapsed Narcissist

I have been aware that though I explain there is no understanding in the part of folks who block me ( blocking feelings , trauma , healing ) and keep false witness to soothe their own needs .

Helping one who has done much harm and still harbors ill feelings and abusive intentions blocks my progress . It’s as if I were compliant and accepting when I’m trying balance within and out and the other is still playing games and wearing a smile throughout .

So I’ve had the force that brought change and much was not my choice and educated choices are much better in the long run .

Separating myself from all attachments to be that 3rd person ; and observing along with research ,experience and dedication to knowing myself , being true to myself and surrendering to Divine ; Thy Will Be Done ✅

Others have Free Will ; I try to provide facts and my thoughts which have repelled by children and I’m surrendered to that .

I’m dedicated to balance in my life and folks who have no agenda and show respect , and love ❤️ and trust 🎁

That’s my Heaven On Earth

My physical home , and peace to be … to cook my meals, bake and alchemy with healing natural methods . Gardening , preserving food , writing ( I’m a poet at heart ❤️) and walking , plus a pet or 2 . It’s been since 2017 since I had space that welcomed pets without a great deal of money and conditions that were not safe for me , nor a pet .

2016 I had a natural habitat for what developed 3 dogs and 2 cats ; an eviction cost me all but 1 who moved with me twice and finally died of what I believe was Lyme related .

It’s been hard but that’s part of Retaliatory Landlord Abuse .

I learned retaliatory at the hands of a master to whom I have detached from long ago .He has not received the message,not accepted that I don’t belong to him .

youtube.com/watch

Trauma & Psychological Abuse

Some of the ways alienators will abuse and manipulate their children is by making them believe lies that will become foundational to their control.

Here are a few:

Your other parent is dangerous.

Your other parent doesn’t care for you.

Your other parent is unavailable for you.

Your other parent is a bad influence.

Which then leads to the abuser being the “better” choice:

I am the only parent who truly loves you.

I am the only parent who keeps you safe.

I am the only parent who is here for you.

I am the parent who sacrifices everything for you.

And results in the child having feelings of:

Betrayal (towards the alienator) for still desiring their “bad” parent.

Feeling guilty when they talk to or communicate with their “bad” parent.

Only being able to love and interact with their abuser.

Hug the Mother

Hold the mother, not the baby.⁣

⁣

Because the baby’s being taken care of—⁣

fed, snuggled, and given all the love in the world—⁣

by not only the mother,⁣

but her partner, grandparents, siblings, cousins, and friends.⁣

⁣

But the mother,⁣

may have gaps in her mind from lack of sleep,⁣

may be mechanical in her motions as she’s healing,⁣

may feel more like a mess than a mother,⁣

may be sitting in bed, crying, feeling overwhelmed in her body and life,⁣

may be full of mom guilt because in her mind, “she’s not good enough,”⁣

and she’s bleeding, wincing in pain, swollen and emotional.⁣

⁣

And the mother’s that baby’s whole world and needs to be seen, so she doesn’t disappear into that postpartum fog.⁣

⁣

So, hold the mother, not the baby.⁣

⁣

A mother agrees that her baby matters more.⁣

But she’s hurting, while she’s the person behind the baby,⁣

in the background, making it all happen:⁣

feeding her baby at all hours,⁣

snuggling her baby close to comfort newborn cries,⁣

and being that baby’s everything.⁣

⁣

So, it’s the mother who needs your love.⁣

⁣

And a mother will remember who held her up.⁣

⁣

So instead of “I’m coming to see the baby,”⁣

try saying, “I’m coming to see you 𝘢𝘯𝘥 meet the baby, too.”⁣

⁣

Because the mother needs to be held more.⁣

📸: This Mama Doodles

……………………………………………..⁣⁣

My Children’s Book 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘖𝘬𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘖𝘬𝘢𝘺: 𝘈𝘥𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘴 𝘎𝘦𝘵 𝘉𝘪𝘨 𝘍𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘛𝘰𝘰 is out everywhere: https://amzn.to/317TvVc

Shove Ins ( body snatchers )

I was evaluated by a woman in 07 by phone appointment , as being a 1st Wave Indigo . She explained that while I was in the hospital , after birthing our 3rd son , ” Jessica” was brought to my hospital after a suicidal act . She shoved her soul which was in a state of addiction with me .

She had lost her precious daughter and felt she could not go on .

I became more aware with our 3rd son how distorted our world really was . I became a shell of myself , realizing I was not valued as a partner , as a wife and there was little I could do but hang in and try hard for normalcy for our sons . It wasn’t ; I simply could not ignore the facts … it only got worse .

I conquered Jessica’s implants and her addictions which were by force by a doctor , compliant by a husband and accepted by every hint of support I had .

Jessica soul retrieval allowed her spiritual reunification with her precious daughters spirit and they walked in fields of gold for eternity.

I am better informed , trust my ancestors , angels and spirit guides of benevolent intent and accept my blessings for my the trust and faith and guidance that has allowed healing and clearing of ancient bloodlines .

As such it is a brand new world , co creating with honor and respect for all that got me here as New Earth births ; I am aware of the totality of losses and I grieve .

All is well with my soul

#Acceptance

youtube.com/shorts/KCk2KuyzowI

Mother Mary

Mother Mary is one of the most highly evolved beings to incarnate in a position of great power and influence on our planet. I was recently at a conference where I was stunned, appalled, even aghast to hear an Angel Teacher describe Mother Mary as a simple village girl who fell in love with Joseph and an angel happened to come to her and ask her to give birth to Jesus. Nothing could be further from the truth. It was 8000 years after the fall of Atlantis and the planet was becoming increasingly dense. The Intergalactic Council decided that something had to be done to raise the light on Earth. Something had to penetrate the gloom. They formulated a plan to bring Christ Light, the unconditional love of Source, back to Earth.

Since the planet was created the Christ light, which has nothing to do with religion, has been held over the Middle East. The hunt was on for a highly evolved being who had the light, power and wisdom to incarnate and be able to carry the Christ light energy and bring it back for humanity. Just as important was the team who would support him. A powerful and highly evolved mother was vital. Who better than Isis? This amazing soul had been tried and tested. She had been instrumental in the ascension of Lemuria, a High Priestess in Atlantis, given Virgin Birth to Horus in Egypt and was now ready to undertake the new cosmic service as Mary, Mother of Jesus.

During her incarnations she was overlit by the great Angel Mary who spreads love and healing throughout the entire universe. Angel Mary held her in her wondrous aquamarine light. The surrounding team of father, grandfather, grandmother, the Wise Men and teachers were all great souls who are now leading our planet forward. Mary was the daughter of Joachim, the High Priest of the Essene Temple of Helios, also known as the Temple of the Sun. When she was a baby she was dedicated as a dove in the holy Temple. Even as a very small child Mary was spiritually aware and attuned. Miracles happened round her.