Patience

The man👨🏽‍🦱doesn’t know that there is a snake 🐍underneath.

The woman🙍🏽‍♀️doesn’t know that there is a stone crushing the man.

The woman 🙎🏼‍♀️thinks: “I am going to fall! And I can’t climb because the snake 🐍is going to bite me! Why can’t the man 🧔🏼use a little more strength and pull me up!” The man 🧑🏾‍🦲thinks: “I am in so much pain! Yet I’m still pulling you as much as I can! “Why don’t you try and climb a little harder!?”

The moral is— you can’t see the pressure the other person is under, and the other person can’t see the pain you’re in.

This is life, whether it’s with work, family, feelings or friends, we should try to understand each other.

Learn to think differently, perhaps more clearly, and communicate better. A little thought and patience go a long way.

Ceremony; I believe in this

When girls become women, there is an elaborate ceremony and all the women who are in the girls life are invited to attend. Making this day special for both the girl and her mother are important whether you are a Native person or not. The boys recognition in becoming a man is a ceremony that is quite different but also needs to be acknowledged. Indigenous people have been doing these ceremonies for hundreds of years – everyone should learn from this ❤

(Art by David Joaquin)

Be silent & Listen to Elders

SAY WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR …

Positivity changes a mind,

A kind word lifts many burdens,

A good deed makes a heart heal,

A gentle voice lifts many broken hearts,

Always say something nice,

Always say something with care,

Always say something in kindness,

Always say something genuine concern,

Always say something with compassion,

Always lift someone up,

Always give what you’ve got,

Always extend an out reached hand,

Always try to patch, mend broken hearts,

Always do something to heal shattered souls,

What goes around,

Eventually comes full circle,

What’s unleashed is delivered,

Someday,

You might be needing,

To hear echoes of yourself …

NEMESIS

The warrior

The messenger

Copywritten by Larry John Adams

From 2 pages that I’ve created called

Native/ inuit Canadian poetry writer

And

Thoughts poems songs and writings

Move on

One of the lesser discussed outcomes of toxic relationships is how narcissists are often successful at convincing your friends and family that YOU are the dysfunctional, toxic one. Sometimes, they can even turn them against you.

So then, not only do you have to cope with the painful smear campaign, but you are also faced with the fact that your friends and family who sided with the narcissist have betrayed you, as well.

These are not your people. Maybe they never were.

Anyone who knows you – authentically – should not side with the person who is trying to tear your life down.

Sure, narcissists are exceptionally skilled at pretending they’re just regular people trying to live their lives, but these people knew you long before the narcissist came along…yet, here they are, siding with them.

If someone doesn’t know you well enough to know the narcissist’s accusations are false, then did they ever really know you?

I find that life is too short to change people’s minds about things. If flying monkeys and enablers want to believe the narcissist’s stories, then they have their own path to travel. It’s not our job to make them see the light.

Along my own journey, I stopped wasting my precious time and energy trying to correct the narrative or defend myself against accusations and the people who wanted to believe them. Let them find out the truth like you did (IF they ever do).

Some people love to eat up drama like a tasty snack.

Some people want to think they found dirt on you.

Some people want to get into the narcissist’s good graces for their own reasons.

And some people are just too naïve and gullible.

None of these people belong in your circle OR your tribe.

These are lost people who need to find their own way or remain unwoke. It’s not your job, and it’s not your project.

Save your precious time and energy for other, more important things…like getting through the smear campaign with the people who are truly on your side.

And if you have no one, get a dog, a cat, or a goldfish. Our tribe can be anyone or any creature who will have our back.

🔥 Grab your free Beginner’s Healing Toolkit for backup:

https://bit.ly/BeginnersRoadmap

#selfhealers

No Change in Toxic Relationships

We all know that narcissists are going to be narcissists. It’s what they do. They will not act out of character by suddenly morphing into a standup person. ⁠

They won’t have the Divine Epiphany, where the angels touch down and instill keen insight into the narcissist’s brain as to how much pain they’ve caused you, dropping them to their knees in the posture of a repentant sinner. ⁠

Toxic relationships don’t suddenly become healthy. People aren’t coming forward with the success story of the decade.⁠

Their toxic patterns have shown us exactly who (and what) they are. At this point, we should expect and block their next hoover after they ghost for the umpteenth time. ⁠

No more effs given. They can go play mind games somewhere else.⁠

If this resonates with you, you’ll find my newsletter educational and validating. It’s a free, thought-provoking email inspired by the latest research and case studies. Join other Survivors and Thrivers by signing up here:⁠

👉 https://bit.ly/BeginnersRoadmap

…or the link in my @Kim.Saeed bio⁠

Your friend on the journey,⁠

Kim 🕊️

Stockholm Syndrome

Stockholm syndrome is a coping mechanism used by many people in toxic and abusive relationships. Instead of feelings of fear, terror, and hostility toward your abuser – which is what you should be experiencing – you may feel a sense of sympathy for them. Your positive feelings toward your abuser are very common and normal when learned helplessness has set in. Subconsciously, you feel you’ve no other choice but to stay with your abuser.

Stockholm syndrome can, and often does, cause targets of abuse to feel as if they’re deeply in love with their abuser.

But, those who have left and started their healing journey soon discover that what they thought was love was a coping mechanism and was the only way they could survive in a dangerous and life-destroying relationship.

If you don’t know how to deal with Stockholm syndrome in the aftermath of narcissistic abuse, it can paralyze you. It sure did me at the beginning of my own journey because I didn’t know how to handle it. But I do now, and I want to help you overcome this awful feeling, too.

Read the article here:

👉👉 https://bit.ly/OvercomingStockholmSyndrome

Always thinking of you,

Kim