1st person account of Mom abused via child abuse

Pain is the point of parental alienation. #Erased #
 It’s the whole point. It’s the reason parental alienation exists. You could say its parental alienation’s reason for being, because that’s exactly what it is. Intense pain aimed at parents like us who love our children more than anything in the world by turning our children against us … is the aim of the alienating parent. It has nothing to do with protecting our children from us or because we aren’t good parents or caring parents or loving parents. Instead, it’s because we are good, caring, and loving parents that our children are tricked into thinking we are evil, forced to reject us, and made to believe they are supposed to hate us. Making us suffer in the worst way possible is the entire mission of the alienating parent, and yet this would never be possible if we weren’t passionate about our children and didn’t have wonderful relationships with them. Poor parents, even mediocre parents, are seldom targets of parental alienation because they can’t be made to suffer enough to make it worth the time, trouble, or risk for the alienating parent to force such a sick twisting-of-mind onto trusting and loving children. You can’t make a child reject a parent they don’t like and you can’t make a parent suffer the loss of a child they don’t care about. And so, by definition, we are targeted parents because we are awesome parents and the pain we suffer from losing our children is precisely what the alienating parent wants. And that’s sick. When we lose a child to parental alienation; that is, when we lose a child to the heinous manipulating, pillaging, and plundering of an innocent mind for the sole purpose of causing us pain, to say our world “changes” doesn’t quite say it all. It doesn’t quite get at the experience of being dropped onto a different planet as different people with very, very different children. It can’t describe this experience because our world doesn’t change so much as it vanishes and the world we suddenly find ourselves in is nothing like the one we used to know. We’re cut off from that world and trapped in an eerily different one similar only in that it still holds echos of the children we used to know who lived in that world with us. But only echoes. Because, even though it may seem as though our children are still with us in our world, they’re not. They’re not the same children. Something has happened to them. Something terrible. And in a manner that can only be described as nightmarish and surreal, the children we cradled, read to, sat up with all night, walked to school, drove to games, and gave everything in our lives for so we could be part of everything in their lives are gone from our world, and we’re alone in a deserted and desolate world that seems to be growing more deserted and desolate each day. But only to us. Not to anyone else. No one else sees this nightmare we’re living. To the people around us nothing seems different or wrong or strange. Except us. And nothing we do seems to make any difference. The world of the targeted parent is a lonely and heartbroken world, which, while remaining lonely and heartbroken for us seems to remain unknown and invisible to almost everyone else. And this crisis we’re now living of being cut off from our children while also being cut off from the people we thought would help us through our crisis, becomes even more heartbreaking when it’s our own family that doesn’t get what’s happening in our lives – that doesn’t understand the hardship we’re facing of having to watch our children change before our eyes while falling away from our lives. And yet, as painful and as heartbreaking as this rejection seems to be it’s not an uncommon reaction from people who have never lost children to the heartbreak and rejection that are so much a part of parental alienation. Not at all. In fact it’s pretty much the norm, even if it’s family. The macabre reality of being rejected by our children while also being rejected and abandoned by those people closest to us – the people we call family – at a time when we need our family most, is an impossibly cruel reality to have to live with; and yet it’s an understandable one considering how difficult parental alienation is to understand, on the surface. Because on the surface it makes no sense that a loving child would reject a loving parent and that they would do this in such a shockingly short amount of time … and … that they would do this in the absence of anything that parent has done to cause this rejection. And it makes even less sense that this child could be manipulated or programmed to do this, as is claimed to be the case. And yet that’s exactly what’s happening, hard as that is to believe. Because that’s exactly what parental alienation is, hard as that is to understand. And so I get that this is a lot for people to accept, especially people who have never experienced the chaos and confusion that are so much a part of this family catastrophe. I get that it makes no sense that loving children would turn against loving parents almost overnight and leave their lives completely. And I get the skepticism and doubt surrounding the claim that something as severe as the loss of a child can be explained by something as simple as some overzealous character assassination or mean-spirited criticism. I get that none of this makes any sense because it didn’t make any sense to me either, at first, and for the longest time I too thought I had done something to my daughter to make her turn away from me so suddenly and leave my life so permanently. I too thought I had hurt her in some way and just couldn’t remember what it was I had done – which is a very unsettling thought to have to live with. And yet it was the only one that made sense to me, at the time. Because at the time I also believed that only something severe a parent had done to a child could make a child turn away from a parent in this way. And I had a difficult time imagining how anything less than this could account for a child hating a parent so viciously and rejecting that parent so callously. And yet, try as I may, I couldn’t think of what I had done to either of my kids, to cause them to act this way toward me. Instead, and as is the case with most alienated parents, just the opposite is true: I’ve always tried to be a good parent to my children, we’ve always had very open communication between us, and we’ve always been very, very close.And so this was all very, very puzzling and I was very, very confused and none of it was making any sense to me, at all. one day i was my daughter best friend and the next she doesnt have to do a thing i say, no respect is shown as before .. something begins to change .. sadly many parents mistake the early alienating behaviors and normal teenage rebellion until its too late .. parents get trapped into frustration n and at time respond in anger at the lack of respect toward them as their mom i had no idea what i could be doing that was so impossible to be forgiven it wasnt even worth the effort to try …. That is, until I read about parental alienation. And then it made sense. Exact sense. Feature-by-feature sense. Symptom-by-symptom exact sense as if the authors I was reading were writing about the life my daughter, son and I were leading. Because at that point our lives had become mirror images of the lives described by the parental alienation authors in the parental alienation books. In fact we fit the model exactly once you began looking under the surface Because under the surface … underneath what we normally understand as the dynamics of the parent-child bond was not the behavior of a child who had been hurt by a parent but was instead the behavior of a child who was made to believe their parent is worthy of hate. Which is something different. Something much worse. And something much less obvious. And the only way to get to these less-obvious explanations for an alienated child’s behavior is to get beyond settling for answers based on hunches and guesses and personal opinions and instead make a genuine effort to look beyond the surface for facts which accurately describe that behavior. Which is something we do anyway with things that are important to us, such as, say, an untreatable child illness that isn’t given a hopeful outcome. And in cases like this we don’t think twice about getting second opinions, doing more research, and looking further and deeper until we find the answers. And we don’t stop until we find them, especially when so much is at stake. And so it only makes sense that we would do the same thing with something as purposely deceiving as parental alienation, where a child’s well-being is also at stake, and where the parents who are losing their children are pleading with us to take a closer look at what’s happening to their family. Because what’s happening to their family is not what it looks like on the surface. And if there’s one thing we know about parental alienation it’s that it’s not what it looks like on the surface. In fact, much of the history of science is essentially a history of the pitfalls of embracing misconceptions and myths about the world and the successes of embracing facts and truth gathered from going beyond superficial observations and speculations in order to determine actual causes responsible for effects we’re witnessing. And once I began doing this – once I began looking at the facts and truth about parental alienation and was able to match the behaviors described in the literature to the behaviors I was witnessing in my children, I was finally able to understand what was causing their strange and irrational behavior toward me. And then things finally started to make sense. Which was very comforting and quite a relief, at first, to know I wasn’t losing my mind and that I didn’t have to keep grasping in the dark for answers. But it was frightening as well because the answers I found only predicted a dark outcome, especially for a family like ours which fit the parental alienation model perfectly. The cold hard facts about parental alienation are that a parent’s chances of ever reconciling with a child who has been brainwashed and manipulated as profoundly as severely alienated children have are very, very slim. In fact they’re worse than if the parent had actually done something to the child. Which is not a very comforting thing to hear if you’re a parent still trying to figure out why your child left you in the first place. And so, knowing this I almost wished I hadn’t found the answers, at least these answers, and that I was still in the dark like I had been and like my friends and family still were. Or I hoped the experts might be wrong or that my family might be an exception, or that maybe, just maybe, I could reconnect with my children despite the slim chances the experts gave of ever doing this. But these were simply not the case, and it was looking more and more like our family was instead a textbook case of the type of family were severe alienation could happen, most likely would happen, and by all measures was happening. We even fit the manner in how it was happening right down to the uncanny and frightening details: All eight manifestations of parental alienation were spot-on as were the warning signs that could lead to alienation such as a long and contentious custody battle and a history of one parent bad-mouthing the other parent in front of the children. All of which are definite dangerous warning signs as well as being definitely us. But what was even more us, and an even more dangerous warning sign, was that of a parent sharing custody with an ex-spouse who has undying passion to take your children away from you. And that we had in spades. Because – and like with most alienated parents – ever since our divorce, my ex has had nothing less than an insatiable quest to exclude me from my children’s lives no matter what it took, no matter who got in his way, and no matter whether he had grounds to make so many false claims about me. And even though he never had the grounds to do this or evidence to support such claims and was therefore never successful, it still never stopped him from trying. Or expressing the truth of these claims to our children . In fact, his need to control our children and control me , making sure it was known he was incharge that he would deside (a need which seemed to control his motivation to erase me from there lives ) by trying to control which parent our children should live with and which parent they should have in their lives how often they will see them and what they can or can not do with that parent, how often they can call or even think about the other parent , which parent they should be able to love, since our separation. And unfortunately for the kids and me we seemed to have gotten used to his demand for control and that it was easier to allow it and comply with his demands rather then deal with his punishment which was to deny access between the kids and myself mainly my son whom is now 12 . I let him have control in attempt to create peace for my children Which was a mistake – a big mistake. Because this warning sign was not only considered the one most likely to lead to alienation and not only did it seem to be lifted right out of our family, but it was also the one I had ignored all those years thinking nothing could ever come of it, because nothing could ever come between me and my children. Ever. It was unthinkable. I was sure of this. But then I was in denial. Even when the poisoning was so bad that my kids began hating me and wanting me out of their lives, and I began reading about parental alienation and studying the reasons for their hatred as well as seeing the overwhelming symptoms and undeniable similarities between our family and the casebook families, I still denied that parental alienation could be happening to us. that it was my fault that the times i reacted in anger was enough to cause such an extreme desire and certainty to remove me as thier motheri was completely shocked this doesnt happen to good parents that love thier children Maybe to other families, it could happen but not to us, was my thinking at the time. Because we were different, we were close. I was a good parent and my kids were good kids and this was absolutely impossible and completely unthinkable and could never ever happen to us. Right? Wrong. So very wrong. I was so wrong about this and I don’t today know how I could have been or how I could have ignored all these warning signs for so long, except for the fact that never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine something like this happening to my family. Ever. It was an impossible thing to imagine. how could a man that emotionally and physically abuse his family turn them on the one that did everything and still does everything they can to try and protect them to put there needs above my own … Which probably explains why parental alienation is so difficult to understand and why it happens so often and goes undetected almost always. Because, on the surface, it’s seldom obvious that something this sinister is happening to a family, and it’s almost impossible to imagine that it could be happening especially to parents who are so loving and caring and involved in their children’s lives. But then, that’s the point. thats why its hard to understand It’s because we are good, caring, and loving parents that we become targets of someone who is trying to hurt us in this way. Which is the great irony and therefore the great stumbling block for so many who are trying to understand this strange family dynamic. Parental alienation doesn’t happen to bad parents or even mediocre parents. It happens to the best parents. And you don’t have to do anything to cause it except be a good parent. Because good parents are the kind of parents who will suffer the most when their children are gone from their lives. Because turning our children against us by turning us into despicable monsters in their eyes and erasing us from their lives is guaranteed to cause us unthinkable amounts of pain. Which is the point, and which took me a while to grasp, and is still unthinkable to comprehend and impossible for my friends and family to make any sense of.or to fully realize how long it has really been going on. But mostly, it’s just plain horrible to have to live with every day. Because it’s not living. There’s no other way to say it: pain is the point of parental alienation. You could say it’s parental alienation’s reason for being. Because that’s exactly what it is. Pain in its cruelest form…

Trump’s separation of families constitutes torture, doctors find | US news | The Guardian

I can testify to this , and am doing my best to get these facts out there .

#Torture&Trauma

Evaluations of 26 people by Physicians for Human Rights provides first in-depth look at policy’s psychological impact
— Read on www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/feb/25/trump-family-separations-children-torture-psychology

Erasing Families : Holiday Message 😘🎄🥳

All of the volunteers at Erasing Family wish Everyone a Safe and blessed holiday! We encourage you to send a thoughtful note and invitation to your child; underneath their pain your children still love you. For children who have been erased, your parents love you. No matter how long it has been, it’s never too late to start fresh. We know how painful it is for kids to miss a parent and their family; and for parents to miss their children. It’s time to heal! Join us in shining light and solutions to awaken the world. Everyone needs more love and children need the love of both parents; let’s do this!❤️🙏❤️

F*ck Minimalism. F*ck Modern. Give me Joyously Cluttered, Antique, Upcycled, Repurposed. | elephant journal

In my many moves , lots of paperwork has been involved

as I move an office and a house it has been arduous, costly

and draining ..At some point I can burn these legal papers

and research , as years of documents are saved can be utilized

and deleted ..

I am not spartan , I enjoy my things , but certainly can downsize

or replace things , I’m not invested in . My home feels like home

and usually takes 18 months or longer to settle into.

Thus I always have projects .. The homes I have rented

require attention , challenges that slow me down or impede

forward movement and are totally avoidable .

It’s repetitive, and closing/clearing , very similar to the shaky

ground of past …

I give things to folks and don’t hold tight to many things .

Having had the experience of 2 or 3 adults , go through my

things and decide what to keep , and what to allow me .

Including our sons ….

I believe in abundance , sharing as much as possible , receiving

support and blessings from many sources , as I surrendered

to my life purpose …I AM HOME 🏠🌈🌝☮️🎁🎅🏼🤶🏼❤️🎄 ©️

Blessings & Peace ,

Doña Luna

Every 2 year moves , mainly for reasons of personal health

and safety

I am not a minimalist. I don’t value empty rooms. I don’t like clutter, either. I like a cozy, spacious, bright, cheerful home. I do not care for the modern fad
— Read on www.elephantjournal.com/2019/09/fck-modern-in-defense-of-antique/

Parental Alienation…it should be a crime | Insiders | tullahomanews.com

I strongly envision legal codes/law , enacted in the United

States , as it is in the United Kingdom .. Mim Of 5 years .

Non gender specific .

I plan to stand for this legislation in my home state of Virginia .

Parental alienation has been defined as the process and the end result of psychological manipulation of a child into showing, unwarranted fear, disrespect, hostility and even hatred towards a parent,
— Read on www.tullahomanews.com/content/tncms/live/

Why psychopaths can’t love their children, according to a psychologist – Business Insider

Weaponized Children , can and does #eraseFamiles , in the competing

of winner take all, secrets , lies , financial issues and adultery normalized

until now ..

Children deserve much better ..

Narcissists see their children as possessions rather than people, according to a psychologist.
— Read on www.businessinsider.com/narcissists-cannot-love-their-children-2017-7

State hospital employee accused of beating mentally ill patient

Human Rights Violations Abuses Ignorance Denial

is common in Mental Wards , where employee are

overworked, undereducated , working in poor

to degrading conditions , underpaid , and trauma

draining of life’s essences .. Certainly no healing

to be had .. Equal to jail , which my experience

as an induced mental patient , I endured mental

wards in 2 local hospitals , and an overnight in

jail, in a judgement, induced by a Domestic Abuser

exhibiting Narcissist Personality Disorder .

Council years ongoing allows me knowledge the

induced mental patient is prevalent in society

to a degree that does not allow its continuation

in our New Earth.. I do what I can to lend my

voice , that the horrific results of Psychology

Psychiatric,Chemical/Big Pharma and a Culture

Of Suicide have had an effect on human kind

that Spirit is transforming . I had no choice

but to survive what erased my voice , as a mental

patient I had no credibility , no rights , and

thus disadvantaged , I was unfit by my partner

who wishes my permanent silence , death

that he can hold secrets of abuses on many

levels , but on high , is demanding loyalty

to him only , separation of mother/child ..

Who I became , upon the evocative PTSD

of addictive RX and Abuses secreted from

childhood , flipping to all manner of fractured

parts , tainted and traumatized 3 I was entrusted

to vessel here .. it’s my job to give them as

much truth as possible , as I am well aware

is worthy of sharing , not as an example

perhaps , as a warning..

Much Better Days than not , I stand still for

preventative care, honoring individuals ,

being conscious …☮️🙏🏼😘

©️

Blessings & Peace ,

Doña Luna

by sons

5 Investigates has learned that six staff members have been placed on leave while the Department of Mental Health investigates.
— Read on www.wcvb.com/article/shattuck-hospital-employee-accused-of-beating-mentally-ill-patient-in-care-of-department-of-mental-health/28765587

Childress -Pruter Presents Paper to APA Convention 🤩VIP !

www.drcachildress.org/asp/admin/getFile.asp

Yesterday was a travel day for me back from the APA convention. Always a delight to see Dorcy. The paper presentation to the APA; Empathy, the Family, and the Core of Social Justice (Childress & Pruter, 2019), represents a major step forward on the path to solution.

APA: Social Justice Paper (Childress & Pruter)

http://www.drcachildress.org/asp/admin/getFile.asp?RID=239&TID=6&FN=pdf

APA: Powerpoint of APA Presentation

http://www.drcachildress.org/asp/admin/getFile.asp?RID=240&TID=6&FN=pdf

In 2017, Dr. Childress and Dorcy Pruter presented to the national convention of the AFCC in Boston:

AFCC: Powerpoint of AFCC Presesentation

http://www.drcachildress.org/asp/admin/getFile.asp?RID=227&TID=6&FN=pdf

We have spoken to the AFCC and to the APA.

I post here to the Alliance Facebook group as the current edge of movement. I post to my blog for more lasting documentation purposes.

We are on a path. There are milestones along that path.

The paper presentation to the APA of Empathy, the Family, and the Core of Social Justice (Childress & Pruter, 2019) represents one of these milestone markers.

We have shifted into a new phase.

I have posted a blog of importance, a phase marker along the path of change. It provides a review the prior phases toward solution, and a look ahead to the coming phase emerging now.

Phases of Immediate Solution

Phases of Immediate Solution

Change is coming, the world is changing… because we are changing it.

It needs to change. I didn’t like the rabbit hole of trauma, it’s too crazy there. I’ll bet you didn’t like it there either. Let’s leave.

It’s time to climb out from the rabbit hole, and reestablish ourselves on the foundational ground knowledge of professional psychology.

We’re like a colony of relentless ants, building a chain out, a collaborative chain out of the tunnels and dark holes of abuse and trauma, and back into the world of sunlight and solid ground, foundations to stand on.

We are an alliance, you are an alliance. Your voice is the power, your united voice coming together into a single relentless voice for change.

The publication of Foundations in 2015, the Petition to the APA signed by 20,000 parents in 2018, the presentations of Dr. Childress and Dorcy Pruter to the AFCC and APA in 2017 and 2019, we are relentlessly creating change.

Because your children need us to, because you need us to. We’re leaving Wonderland and returning to reality, where truth exists and professionals are held to the highest standards of professional practice with children and families, and with the court.

With the paper presentation by Dr. Childress and Dorcy Pruter to the American Psychological Association Division 24, Theoretical and Philosophical Psychology, the earth shifted on its foundations. We are entering a new phase.

The solution is available immediately. Right now. The moment we apply knowledge. Like the magical ruby slippers in Oz, you’ve always had the ability to go home, just apply knowledge, just apply knowledge, just apply knowledge; Bowlby, Minuchin, Beck.

My next phase is writing. I’ll be collaborating with Dorcy who will be leading some change processes with mental health and legal professionals in the days ahead.

We are relentless. We will recover your authentic wonderful children.

Craig Childress, Psy.D.

Clinical Psychologist, PSY 18857

‘Obscenely high’: how family court costs are destroying parents and their children | Australia news | The Guardian

Justice Robert Benjamin says a culture of bitter, adversarial and highly aggressive family law litigation ‘must stop’
— Read on www.theguardian.com/australia-news/2017/dec/20/obscenely-high-how-family-court-costs-are-destroying-parents-and-their-children

Legally Kidnapped: ‘Foster dad begged for custody of girl, 7, he said was in danger then raped her’

The matrix of abuses of children has been revealing more

and more of these cases , and I try to focus on the best possible

outcome for the child(ren) who in reality have no rights …

Getting worse before it gets better is upon us ..

Our New Earth 🌏 will not allow these impactful abuses

that can be life long trauma ..

As a parent , as a Mom , witnessing , and the intuitive

knowing , yet not knowing these years of separation

that’s been the weapon utilized , the results of which

are child abuse , with legacies for survivors that are

as if sexually abused .

The circus and the monkeys that assist, encourage , profit

and abuse is extinct .. Facts are facts , and the truth is going

to liberate a lot of folks from the side effects of societies

who were misled , and induced into the culture of suicide

that’s conscious and awake , and transforming a horrific

span of time ..

Of this I am 110% sure , and doing my best despite adversities

that include knowing my death is the goal, forgiveness is

not a character trait , certainly not for himself , which is were

fear , trauma, dis ease , shame , etc keep one stuck.

Deserving to step out of that matrix , staying with what has

worked in the past , denial of facts , is more difficult

when lying became easier , long ago.

As exampled by this post, purging these toxic abuses , for

awareness of what it is …it is epidemic

Having been educated in so many ways , it is my job

to share as much as possible of what I am in Awareness

of , in large part , Faith that I would be shown the truths

and light would dispel the darkness… that our children

matter , that I matter .. To end this malignant , High Conflict

20 plus year effort to target , abuse , exposure with legitimate

facts , which are the unfortunate experience for many families

as many in number come together we are heard ..

This is unfolding , with variable offerings , which can be

extremely expensive at present … As the truth is revealed

education , and training , will include much easier , simpler

modalities , of which I lean into holistically as possible

that allow the empowerment of survivors.

We want the best possible outcome , including the healing

of the deep trauma of the abuser , as we step out of shadow

and into the light … it is not our job to fix anyone …

Just to assure that the best interest of a child , in each of us

to be empowered to survive and thrive in all ways of

mind, body and spirit .

©️

Blessings & Peace ,

Doña Luna

Legally Kidnapped: ‘Foster dad begged for custody of girl, 7, he said was in danger then raped her’
— Read on legallykidnapped.blogspot.com/2019/07/foster-dad-begged-for-custody-of-girl-7.html