Boundary Violation

Dr. Annie Kaszina has this to say about forgiveness of your abuser:

Notice, this is all about self-forgiveness. Those people who tell you that you need to forgive the people who hurt and abused you, might well not be considering your feelings in all of this.

Your feelings are what matter.

Toxic people who hurt you quite deliberately don’t need your forgiveness. They won’t do anything good with it. If and when you actually want to forgive them, feel free. But do think what that forgiveness means to you.

It can just mean cutting the cords of resentment – but still holding people accountable for their behavior. In your own mind, at least.

It doesn’t mean exposing yourself to further abuse.

The person who needs your forgiveness is you. Clearly, your life suffered as a result of choices you did or didn’t- could or couldn’t – make.

Even if the choices were wrong, your intention was likely honorable. So, forgive yourself for your mistakes and allow yourself to start to rebuild.

Lyme Info

I have failed 2 test for Lyme

A former friend tried to say

I had it , perhaps he wished

it so.

I do feel that there are

overlapping symptoms

few doctors are knowledgeable

I have been celibate by choice

for 12 years and have no

regrets if this is fact , about

sexual transmission .

I pray for an end to these

diseases that I feel are

engineered for profit and

economic growth for an

industry of medicine .

I’m into preventative , natural

alternatives , due to that harm

done by modern medicine

that omits mind, body & spirit .

Nark Parent

Anything and everything has been done and said to disqualify me as a parent . As a person

Money is a super power , thus I should not have money to buy a house , a new vehicle, to pay for health,dental treatments, much less travel or invest .

So entitled, he has negotiated leasing contracts , and I receive varied amounts of income per year in a 5 year contract period .

For 20 years !!!

Believing your own lies and expecting me to.

My social security was affected by his 1 check from check company which looked like higher income and thus he paid taxes on it .

With credit & family companies and connections plus his creative abilities allowed him to annul our marriage with a request and large donation!

Nothing he won’t do to save his reputation EXCEPT doing the right thing . Doing as he wrote , promising .

He loves ” his ” kids ….

Truth Tellers

As a child I was treated like a snitch for being honest . I recall telling Dad that Mom was smoking when she told him she was not .

I was young and may not have understood the dynamics but I did not lie or ignore what I saw . Not to say that I was validated rather I was not treated well for refusing the shadow of lies

Leaving A Narcissist

Unfortunately psychiatric “care” by an alumni of his reduced me physically and mentally , spiritually depleted with absolutely no one who had an awareness and supported me .

It was a wasteland ; and in that space he went for the juggler as his ” non interest ” was exhibited with his new supply were giddy with new love .

Showing me that I had no place at the table as it were , he walked out and I knew I’d be in peril due to ALL being his .

Being so medicated as to render me indefensible and secretive information that received years later bear out his strategy of complete alienation of anything healthy , joyful or equatable .

Winner take all ,and yes he tried

The one message I have for you today is this…⁣⁣⁣⁠


If the person who’s causing you pain had any plans to stop hurting you, they would have done it by now.⁣⁣⁣⁠


If you are dealing with a narcissist, never, ever give credence to their words. Always pay attention to their actions.⁣⁣⁣⁠


And they don’t get credit for “being good” for a few days if they go back to being abusive. Even Hitler had his moments of seeming kindness.⁣⁣⁣⁠


Some people are excellent actors, reading you the script you want to hear that feeds into the fantasy that things will get better…soon, one day, if only you hang in there.⁣⁣⁣⁠


On the flip side, a person might not be generous with kind words, but you know from their actions that they care about you …because they SHOW it.⁣⁣⁣⁠


Lip service does not lead to happiness. Take a long hard look at the patterns and draw your conclusions from there.⁣⁣⁣⁠


And if you need support, check out the resources in my link.

There’s something in there for everyone.⁣⁣⁣:






#newlife #nocontact #spiritual #healing #lifebeginsafternocontact #narcissisticabuserecovery⁣

Isolation Abuse of Narcissism

Her words blew me away as the experiences I have had are part of the entirety of the dark shadow that never sees the light .

I seemed to have known for decades after event after event , stagnant growth that deteriorated in a lack of consciousness and connection with God and he must have known .

Loosing respect , trust and love as you fear for your children while in a ” chemical straightjacket ” and under his control , unable to find legal representation for this ongoing high conflict , malignant war he remains in .

In a time of rising consciousness , those who continue to abuse , use and target another are exposing themselves in the equation .

Across the board , the highest on high in our world to the lowest of the low , we choose our destiny after hardships that defy anything close to normal , or safe .

On my own is absolutely the right place for me 🙏

Child Abuse

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The parent-child relationship is one of the strongest human bonds and it is totally heartbreaking when a parent and a child are no longer in contact. Two reasons for this can be parental alienation or estrangement. Two sides of the same coin. Both involve grief, regret, torment, and heartbreaking separation, but are also different as I shall try to explain below.

In the Journal of Forensic Science, the difference between parental alienation and realistic estrangement was defined this way: Parental alienation is the rejection of a parent without legitimate justification and realistic estrangement is the rejection of a parent for a good reason.

Parental alienation: When the relationship was previously loving, and in the absence of emotional or physical abuse, parental alienation is seldom initiated by the child. This pathological behaviour is born of a false or illogical belief fostered by the alienating parent, out of hatred, fear, envy, or disrespect, usually during and after a high conflict divorce, though alienation behaviours might have started while the parents were living together under the same roof. The alienating parent will use the child as a weapon by undermining their previously happy, loving relationship with the mentally healthy parent. With parental alienation, the child treats the parents as good and bad, right and wrong. They take on the alienating parent’s beliefs, justifications, fears, anger, language … they become loyal defenders of the ‘good’ parent because that parent has worked on them. Some liken it to a cult leader and their followers, or to brainwashing. The child aligns with the aggressor (please see my post on this).

Estrangement: Although this is also traumatic and heartbreaking, it is different to parental alienation. It doesn’t stem from the other parent doing all they can to destroy the parent/child loving relationship, but instead from the child’s independent-minded decision. The child puts up a boundary to prevent unwanted behaviour from his/her parent. This can include a great many things, including family conflict, disparaging behaviour, disagreements over life choices, violence, and abusive language .. … It is sadly fairly common for a parent who is estranged from his/her children to blame the other parent of parental alienation. It is easier to blame others than to take on any blame and responsibility themselves. The parent’s behaviour could be driving a child away, but their lawyer blames it on alienation. This is a travesty of justice, and courts must be more aware of these false accusations. It is important to evidence everything.

Whether you are going through estrangement or parental alienation, it is essential to get the emotional support you need. If you are reunited with your child, you can also try family counselling to help repair the relationship. I advocate Conscious Parenting. Whatever you choose, never hesitate to reach out for help. If the reconnection isn’t yet happening, or it’s been a long time since you’ve experienced separation, make sure you are looking after yourself, to get beyond grief and rage, and try to accept the situation, best you can. You deserve to be happy.