Tag: C-PTSD

This song describes in part my experience and that of many boomers

who retain faith and hope , in a better world for all. In a society of suicide

we may have been induced into that society , duped that it was entirely

up to the individual ..Addictions became common , unexplainable, and

the individual who was already targeted by abuse with the home to such

a degree , that many stones lay in the road.

Who has not been held accountable ? Chemical /Pharmaceutical Corps co joined

with the AMA and APA and therapist who stay in the induction state due to

the enormous profit ..

Same reason a partner seizes the induction of illness of any kind to plot

an escape that only physically proves an abuse and ego that takes years

to get in alignment with their plan.

That does not detract from the totally casual partnership , that has no truth

being built on a foundation of friendship , that includes infidelity, withholding

information , emotionally, spiritually , financially, in order to have a body in house

to do whatever is wanted or needed .

Silence became the norm , 3 months after I do, when blessed with child became

a burden , I had to step out of .. I gained 30 lbs over my norm , our son was over

due , with the blatant disregard , disconnect as he discussed this problem

5 days a week at work.. He became the victim .. I became it , as he’s prone to

state , he had to marry me .

Wed 3/4/77 a year of great astronomy/astronomy, his wounds became

more clear and pronounced in the mask or his truth showed up in the

year of Chiron the wounded healer planet was discovered .

Our 1st son , bore his name , though he protested , I did not understand

his reasoning for not IV ing , as time bore out . 3/11/78, 2 weeks late

put his expected time of arrival was 2/28/78, my non Leap Year

celebration .

His 🎂 birth even 2 weeks late , still bore out , his false assertion that

he had to marry me .

Yes he had to…I cooked , I cleaned , I cared , I looked presentable when we

went out , quickly pushing through the judgement and critical words of

his life long partner .. Yes , I belonged to him, and a child he did not mentally

or emotionally prepare for , refusing to take precaution for , lacking that

responsibility , showed up where it mattered most ..💰💰💰

Joy was not something I attach him to in those days ..

Mask of the corporate , secrets, family business , locked into place

he was more aware with our 2nd son, whose birth was stressful

and he was drunk, or hung over ..Back labor, was harsh and

he was indisposed until birth , decrying he always wanted a brother.

Our 3rd Son, was the unspoken , Well you know what you’re in for

as a single parent , stay at home Mom …

Yes , I began to know my place in his world , had no growth , no real

attachment , no foundation .. I had 3 sons to nurture , and I was allowed

and I tried to make that enough ..

I was not enough, I lived with that those last 5 years , as he searched for love

outside himself, still … I gave up on him…A desire to hold me in the same

possessive shadow in regards to our sons , who have no intimate connection

to me ..

As it appears , winner takes all..he cannot take what does not , and never did

belong to him..

Stones in the Road , were boulders that have been removed , as the facts are the

truth , long ago released from abuse that has continued beyond , beyond .

I am not the sledge hammer , I am the Mom who knows the light heals

and I can longer accept being a target that has resulted in our sons being

abused as well, their children , a tradition that can cease and desist .

©️

Blessings and Peace ,

Doña Luna 🥰🎉❤️

Doña Luna

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