Tag: parents

Psychosis Is an Expression of Early Childhood Trauma | Daniel Mackler – Mad In America

This is a perfect summation of trauma, born of abuses unspoken , ignored for decades , until life stressors bring it up for review and healing .

It was so with me, and I was powerless to prevent it , when medicated , I watched it going on with our sons..

With regards to myself and sons , the denial was and still is the foundation for Dad , as it has been his family code, and must be protected from exposure at all cost.

The signs have been there, and in trying to protect or get help , our family was erased and all the icky stuff , denied healing until it’s a monstrous mountain that’s impossible to surmount . Dodging the big stuff , only creates bigger stuff, and when everyone around you has unhealed trauma , denial etc , this becomes a normal set point .

We , as a family attended 1 family counseling session, and ex said he would not return.. not interested

Faith/church/religion was the same; NOT interested..

I came to know his lack of interest in me also, but I noted lack of interest in himself , and a very dark soul wound that drove his desire to be happy , elsewhere , creating a past that served his victim , survivor ” experience”

What makes psychosis confusing is that an eruption of infant trauma is expressing itself through the lens, the body, and the voice of someone who is now an adult.
— Read on www.madinamerica.com/2023/05/psychosis-is-an-expression-of-early-childhood-trauma-daniel-mackler/

The Medicalization of the American Mind – Mad In America

As I experienced the pathology of a diagnosis that was false; a cover up for Domestic, Spiritual,Emotional and financial abuse , I found myself loosing everything . Family destroyed, children ignored and after years of investment in the healing of children , I am surrendering to further investment in myself , with children who like their mother/father guide of 20 years plus , has a trauma bond , secrets, shame etc that’s predominate over healing . Ie : stuck, in denial, or desirous of my demise.

I have been toughened up enough to not show emotions , and not to invest my energies , where I’d prefer not to be any longer .

Watching on the sidelines, taking no interest in me whatsoever, living in distortions , and unforgiving . Knowing how their spirits and souls are affected , and not being heard , in any mode but shaming , blaming and disposal.

Our sons have been guided, by other mothers, wives and abusive relationships , that ” own ” them, and disallow that healing matters, due to the influence that healthy healing might have on their relationships.

Lashing out at me, years ago , requesting I commit suicide , not once but twice …setting me up to be illegally arrested …threatening me with exposure of sexual abuse , writing of these memories ,citing highly distorted experiences , 2 of 3 trying to buy my property , with no though to my future , deny the fact that healing is needed.

With knowledge and awareness of the destiny of actions and none actions , I have no choice but to release , forgive their actions/non actions , for a past , and present that is far from normal , far from love , that prefers secrets, disposal and non forgiveness , and I am assured and assuring that these shadow energies will not be my future.

My efforts to heal myself , will not be breached, of this I am sure , as everything I knew of love was attempted to be destroyed , but I held on .

My prayers for a life of spirit , of sharing experiences and wisdoms are at hand , after much effort , I know my worth , and pray for the deliverance of each child, and adult that lost their normal, natural path , due to a distorted, partner, addictive and abusive , debilitating drugging by psychiatry who have been instrumental in ” erasing families “.

Failure with my own children , who prefer status quo , has taught me well, as years of co council with young people their age , who favor me , and my wisdoms .

While that may not be my future , one on one for the drain on my energy , I will be writing , reading and moving forward unfettered by grievances, abuses etc …for that’s exactly what’s most desired ..that I give up and give in, which just isn’t realistic. Generational trauma and abuse has been resolved , I understand and respect free will, and release the painful , often horrific experiences of past , and disallow any repeats .

Dona Luna 🐸✌️😘❤️

One cause of fragility? Pathologizing our children with psychiatric diagnoses and focusing on a medical solution to life’s problems.
— Read on www.madinamerica.com/2023/05/medicalization-american-mind/

Parent : Forgive Yourself and Release your Adult Child whose unforgiving

This came in , just when I needed to hear this message the most …..

youtube.com/watch

Decline of independent children – Mad in America

Childhood anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts are on the rise as opportunities for children to be independent have dwindled, according to a new article in The Journal of Pediatrics. The research, led by psychologist Peter Gray from Boston College, used data on adolescent independence from multiple decades and countries to investigate the high incidence of mental health issues, like anxiety and depression, among today’s youth.

Gray and his co-authors observed that children in the 1970s or earlier had far more freedom to roam, play, and engage in activities without adult supervision than children today. They argue that the decline in opportunities for children to participate in independent activities has contributed to the rise in mental disorders. Independent activities can promote mental health by providing immediate satisfaction and building mental resilience to cope with life’s stresses.

“Those of us old enough to have been children in the 1970s or earlier know from experience that children then had far more freedom to roam, play, and engage in various activities independently of adults than do children today. Research has confirmed that our memories are not distorted,” the authors write.

“Our thesis is that a primary cause of the rise in mental disorders is a decline over decades in opportunities for children and teens to play, roam, and engage in other activities independent of direct oversight and control by adults. Such independent activities may promote mental well-being through both immediate effects, as a direct source of satisfaction, and long-term effects, by building mental characteristics that provide a foundation for dealing effectively with the stresses of life.”

The Decline of Independence and Its Toll on Kids’ Mental Health

www.madinamerica.com/2023/05/the-decline-of-independence-and-its-toll-on-kids-mental-health/

Adultifcation – Role Reversal of parent/ child

Adultification (or parentification) happens as a result of a parent expecting or needing a child to become a ‘grown up’, exposing them to an adult world prematurely. This robs that child of an innocent, carefree childhood. The child feels pressured to take on responsibilities or worries that the parent has burdened them with by their selfish oversharing and they’re denied the space to develop a separate and autonomous life. There’s instrumental parentification when a child takes on physical tasks like caring for an unwell family member or working to provide more money, things that would usually be done by the parent. Emotional parentification is especially common in parental alienation. The parent’s negative projection (onto the target parent) is enforced and indoctrinated on the child. Even though it’s good for a child to learn responsibilities, care for others, and altruism – the child may end up working in mental health – but in the extreme, adultification involves maladaptive narcissistic parenting.

#parentalalienation #parentalalienationawareness #charliemccready #9StepProgram #coparentingwithanarcissist #coparenting #childabuse #highconflictdivorce #divorce #narcissisticchildabuse #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissism #narcissist

Manipulation of children via parent

Self-worth and self-love are integral to our happiness. If we don’t get a sense of our own value when we’re children, during school years, or with our spouse/partners, we can potentially open ourselves up to experiences in our lives that reflect our low self-esteem/lack of self-love back at us, reinforcing the proverbial vicious cycle.

“You don’t attract what you want, you attract what you are.” Wayne Dyer

“Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds” Bob Marley

I speak from experience. I have been through many dark nights of the soul over the years. Many. And always it comes back to the need for more self-love and worth. It starts with that.

You’ve heard it before, I’m sure, but we must love ourselves first and be our own best friends. We must love and care for ourselves as we love and care for others. Those people and experiences we’ve attracted into our lives, like those parental alienators, take advantage of kindness and generosity, love and compassion. Healthy relationships come from mental and emotional maturity and balance. Boundaries. Self-respect. Love is not conditional – attachment, promises, control, manipulation. We don’t need validation from others. We are enough We can let go of fear, anger, grief … I know, it’s hard, but it can be done. With time, kindness, and some conscious effort of course. We can start afresh every day. A clean slate. We are not victims. We can transform pain into power. The past is over. Our memories can’t hold us back forever.

“There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” Carl Jung

Nobody else has the permission to tell us we are less, not good enough, unlovable … that stems from their own issues and fears. We should know better if only our minds would just give us a break and be our friend, not our prison guard. Today offers the gift of the present. We can be the saviour, the hero and the creator of our lives.

#parentalalienation #parentalalienationawareness #divorce #highconflictdivorce #childabuse #narcissisticchildabuse #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissism #narcissist #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissisticabuserecovery #charliemccready #personalauthority #9StepProgram

Exits

A Soul of 98 years , passed April 22/23 exiting this real in peaceful sleep. She was a widow of 16 years .

She grew peonies , and gave starts to me and many others in the family that I married . She was a force that only recently renewed her drivers license!

Her passing contributes to the change upon us ; clearing of the past and ending cycles .

🌈

This is my photo , and it’s not of her gifted start, but I had folks stop as I worked in my flower bed , to tell me I had a beautiful garden as a young Mom . Her gift for flowers was known in her area and she provided flower arrangements for her church and others . She created all the floral arrangements for our wedding and reception , giving her only son the best she could and it was pretty awesome . I gave her free reign to pick music out too!

She had done so with her two daughters and I wasn’t really into a wedding so lavish . She paid too , as a divorce’ with a very low paying job and parents who still had 2 kids in house , I was not going to come up with money for this event !

She paid for the reception and it was a blur of changing cloths , and picture taking . Those pictures were by the best photographer in her town and 1 was blown up and put in a frame for the front window !!!

May there be fields and fields endless flowers , near an ocean where you join your Beloved Mr .

Dona Luna 🐸