Tag: Children

Natural Life

For nearly all of the time humans have been on the planet, regular conversations across the species border were an everyday natural part of life.

Sadly, this seems like a strange invitation in our world today; most people have difficulty initiating such a conversation. Perhaps this is because we’ve been taught from a very young age to perceive nature as separate, a life-less object, a commodity. This mistaken perception seems to be at the foundation of our cultural ills.

In The Lost World of the Kalahari, Laurens van der Post writes about living among the Bushmen of the Kalahari Desert and describes how shocked they were that he couldn’t hear the stars. At first they thought he must be joking or lying. When they realized he really couldn’t hear the stars, they concluded he must be very ill and expressed great sorrow. For the Bushmen knew anyone who can’t hear nature must have the gravest and deadliest sickness of all.

Humanity’s ability to perceive the sentience of Earth is critical to our survival and to all life on earth.

Longing to be in conversation with nature can catalyze us. And perhaps the natural world longs for this relationship with us too.

Longing is not acquiring, as the vulnerability of failure feels all too possible. Instead, longing incites us into feeling the love-ache of what we really value, and it matures us into becoming and creating that which matters most, like an embodied prayer that lays our life on the altar to serve what we love.

~ Rebecca Wildbear, the Animas Valley Institute: https://animas.org/books/bill-plotkins-soulcraft-musings/newsletter-archive/

[Art: Ruth Evans Art]

Childress on Gardner

Debate. I wanna debate someone sometime.

I don’t care who, I don’t care what it’s about. It can be about forensic psychology. It can be about Gardner’s PAS. It can be about AB-PA. It can be about the future of the family courts.

Forensic psychology is a failed experiment in service delivery that needs to end, and we need to return to clinical psychology – diagnosis and treatment – in the family courts.

Forensic psychology needs to end. It solves nothing and never has.

Gardner’s PAS is the worst model for a pathology ever developed in the history of humanity – the worst – in 2013 it had a full and complete review by the American Psychiatric Association and it was fully rejected as a diagnostic construct.

The Gardnerian PAS “experts” are a fringe group of mental health people (not professionals) who reject the diagnostic guidance of the American Psychiatric Association and the ethical guidance of the American Psychological Association.

Forensic psychology and Gardner’s PAS are both creations of the pathology designed to degrade the mental health response to the pathology. We need to return to clinical psychology.

We need to establish standards of practice to which ALL mental health people can be held accountable – this is the APA ethics code. Everyone – everyone – must apply exactly the same knowledge (the best) to reach exactly the same conclusions (accurate) and make exactly the same recommendations (effective).

Everyone must be held accountable to ethical standards of practice – ethical practice is not optional – it is required… mandatory… no exceptions because you think you’re “special” – everyone.

Do you want to argue that? Fine. Let’s debate. A 2-hour moderated online debate – Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

Topic: The Role of Forensic and Clinical Psychology in the Family Courts – Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

Topic: Does PAS Offer a Solution to Custody Conflict in the Family Courts? Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

Topic: Does AB-PA Offer a Solution to Custody Conflict in the Family Courts? Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

Topic: AB-PA vs. PAS as a Solution for the Family Courts – Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

Topic: Does “Parental Alienation” Exist? – Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

Topic: Are Forensic Psychology and PAS Creations of the Pathology? – Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

Topic: Anything You’d Like – Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

A 2-hour online moderated debate – Dr. Chidress vs. Anyone about anything. Pick the topic, pick the opponent, set the date and the platform, send me an invite… and let’s debate the issues.

Dr. Childress vs. Anyone about anything.

Bill Bernet? Jennifer Harman? Karen Woodall? Anyone?

Stahl or Simon? Susan Deutsch? Matthew Sullivan? Anyone?

Crickets is all I hear. The pathogen does not want to debate issues, it wants to hide in ignorance and apathy.

If there’s a debate… there’s clarity… and it remains online, up on the Internet for everyone to see. The pathogen does not want to be seen. They refuse to debate because they will be exposed for all to see.

I know that. They know that. I see the pathogen moving in minds that you don’t necessarily see… yet.

Forensic psychology and Gardner’s PAS are products of a pathogen – a trauma pathogen in the attachment networks – their purpose is to degrade the mental health response in the family courts.

Forensic psychology is the capture – PAS is the bait.

Find a forensic psychologist or PAS “expert” who disagrees – Debate – a 2-hour moderated online Debate: Is Forensic Psychology a Product of the Pathology it Seeks to Solve?

Find a Gardnerian “expert” who disagrees – Debate – a 2-hour moderated online Debate: Was PAS Created by the Pathology as Bait for Parents?

Topic: Is Forensic Psychology in Violation of Multiple Ethical Standards and Principles of the APA Ethics Code?

Affirmative – Dr. Childress
Negative – ? ? ? no one… because it’s true.

The forensic psychologists are exploiting a “vulnerable population” (compromised autonomy in decision-making) for their own personal financial gain. Forensic psychology is in violation of Principle D Justice protections for equal-access and equal-quality of services. Forensic psychologists are routinely and consistently in violation of Standards 2.04, 9.01, 2.01, and 3.04 of the APA ethics code, and routinely in violation of the duty to protect obligations.

Debate – Dr. Childress vs. Anyone.

July, 2022… I wonder how long they can hide? The pathogen loves to hide. That’s it’s first defense. It’s second defense is to seek allies. Don’t agree… let’s debate it – anywhere – anytime – anyone.

The pathogen hides… not anymore.

Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, CA PSY 18857

Delusional Distorted Disorder ~ Childress

I have two questions for you:

Q1: What happens when you’re a sane person surrounded by people in a shared delusional disorder?

Q2: Am I talking about the family courts or our current political surround?

It’s called parallel process. It’s because they are both from the same pathology, the collapse of narcissistic personality pathology into persecutory delusions (Millon, 2011)

A show of hands, is my first question about the family courts or about our political surround? One… two… keep your hands up… three… Okay, wait, maybe this will be easier. All of you who think Q1 is about you in the family courts, go stand in that corner, and all of you who think it’s about our political surround, go stand over there, that’ll make it easier.

It’s called parallel process – if you have the eyes to see.

Forensic psychology and Gardner’s PAS were created by the pathology – they are symptom features of the pathology.

Take a deep breath, we’re going the next level in. There is a reason I refer to it as a pathogen. It operates like a virus of the mind. It’s in our attachment networks, from unresolved childhood trauma. The attachment system is a motivational system.

This pathogen (damaged information structures) has access to our motivational networks. It has motivational control of us.

You’re unique here. You have your own “special” psychologists just for you… who specifically do NOT diagnose or treat pathology. Curious.

You’re given a diagnosis to achieve by one man, a Richard Gardner back in 1985 – PAS – that’s not really an actual diagnosis, which has no treatment, and which has to be proven to a judge at trial – the hardest thing possible to do. Curious.

It’s a shared delusional disorder. Why don’t you simply diagnose the pathology with real diagnoses? Curious.

We are returning to the established scientific and professional knowledge of the discipline. We are going to accurately diagnose the pathology in the family courts, and we are going to fix the pathology in the family with effective treatment.

This is child abuse. If you believe the shared delusion, you become part of the shared delusion, you are part of the pathology. When that pathology is child abuse, you are part of the child abuse, you are the child abuser.

This was an attempted coup, the overthrow of American democracy. If you believe the shared delusion, you become part of the shared delusion, you become part of the overthrow of American democracy, you become a traitor to America.

Q1: What happens when your a sane person surrounded by people in a shared delusional disorder?

Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, CA PSY 18857

Dad takes his life due to legal and grief over his kids

CW-Suicide

This is the final photograph of Phillip Herron 34, crying in his car, literally minutes before he took his own life.

He was a single Dad of three young children, struggling with escalating debt of over $20,000 and was desperately waiting for a Payday lending payment he’d applied for. But it’s paid in arrears, with a 5 week wait time. That wait drove him even deeper into debt, and when he died he had $4.61 in his bank account and clearly couldn’t see any other way out.

Like a lot of people, especially men, he kept all of this to himself, nobody else knew how bad things were getting. The poor man even had to tell his children that Father Xmas wouldn’t come this year, and in his suicide note he wrote that they’d be better off if he wasn’t there any more.

And now he isn’t.

We need to talk more. We need to be kinder. And we need to be a country that helps people when they need it the most.

Boys learn to isolate or anger as toddlers . It’s too feminine to allow emotions , tears ???

Be a Big Boy 👦

My Little Man 👨

He’s a child and worthy of expression of his feelings in a way that is not anger or rage but expressed in communication that is received compassionately and doesn’t project or target the other person .

Children deserve truth per maturation/age etc because they do get curious and asking around in peer’s can mislead or pressure an opinion .

Boys can be harsh and very physically intimating on impressionable younger boys and so they deserve to have a foundation that allows them participating in open , factual discussions per age and readiness .

Too late I realized that younger kids who hung out with our sons but had over 5 years life experience ; had much trauma at a young age sexually and other ways . This did not become fact to me until later in life as did the competition as I had our 1st child . I did not pick up on jealously and that would extend to lust for what I had in partnership . It was very unbalanced and I have had moments of clarity about the negative influences early on towards our 3 children .

I have grieved deeply about this and baby sitters and relatives that had our children when we were not there to witness and protect them .

This Dad could not take anymore . I’m not suicidal and I’ve had decades to surrender to the horrific cost of distorted alienating that is a living death when one has no contact with one’s children as punishment that continues Domestic Abuse/ Malignant/ High Conflict / Intimate Partner Violence that is non gender specific and is Child Abuse

Trauma Bonds& Children

Did you know that we’re not the only ones who experience trauma-bonding in toxic relationships?

If you have a narcissist in your home with your children (as their parent or otherwise), they will become trauma-bonded, too.

This partly explains why many children, regardless of age, seem to “side” with the narcissistic parent. There are other reasons for this, but trauma bonding is one of the primary ones. They can’t help themselves.

I wrote an article about the damage narcissists does to children. You can read it here:

👉 https://bit.ly/NarcissistsDevastateChildren

Just as you have a hard time analyzing why you dislike the narcissist, but can’t seem to leave them, children are even less equipped to handle trauma-bonding and the other symptoms that arise from narcissistic abuse.

Many of the same dynamics that you experience in your relationship with the narcissist, your children are also experiencing, no matter how much you may try to shield them.

For example, if the narcissist is your partner and they constantly cheat on you, your children experience the backlash from this, as well. And not only from the narcissist, unfortunately. Think about it…if you’re constantly cheated on by the narcissist, how many hours do you spend playing detective, checking out social media for proof, researching narcissism, having meltdowns in your bedroom, and chatting in the forums?

What often happens is that children are not only ignored and neglected by the narcissist, but you can’t be present with them, either, when you are constantly devastated by repeated infidelities and other relationship dramas.

But aside from that, your children become trauma-bonded to the very person you’re trying to protect them from. There’s really no way to shield them from this if there is a narcissist in the home.

Just as you become euphoric over relationship crumbs, so do children.

Just as you become devastated by the lies, so do children.

We want to believe that children are emotionally resilient, but we are now seeing the devastating effects of this old belief. Just as with us, the trauma they experience becomes deeply embedded and affects them their whole lives…often leading them into their own toxic relationships as they mature and become adults.

When there is a narcissist in the home, children cannot learn what healthy love is and many of their own needs are overlooked or unnoticed. There isn’t a magical bubble that protects them from the dysfunctional dynamics of toxic relationships with dysfunctional people.

+++++++++++++

Ready to put up an electric fence? Then (if you haven’t already), make sure you watch my free workshop on severing trauma bonds.

🖥️ https://bit.ly/7StepsBreaktheNarcissisticSpell

Always thinking of you. Xo

Kim

Cosmic Mother

”But patriarchy must maintain, by force, an unnatural system. Since the supreme creator is a male, woman must be redefined as “male property,” i.e., as “wife.” In fact the very idea of a male Creator God carries within itself the necessity for some kind of tightly controlled class-caste society. Because it is only through the creation of life through human mothers, now passive and powerless, that the male God can claim glory for himself. He cannot, he does not go through the dangerous episode of childbirth in his own person. He uses women to do it for him. Then, contrary to the truth, he claims that he is the all-mighty creator. The woman, at best, is patronized for her role as “divine housewife.” –Monica Sjoo & Barbara Mor, The Great Cosmic Mother

Cosmic Mother Birthing by Melissa Shemanna

Human Rights /Women’s Rights

Pro-Lifer: Well, the mother should just give the baby up for adoption if she doesn’t want the baby…

Me: So, who will adopt the baby?

PL: I don’t know there’s lots of couples who want to adopt

Me: Do you know any couple who is waiting to adopt?

PL: Um well not personally but like I know there’s lots of people waiting to adopt.

Me: Do you know what a domestic adoption cost?

PL: I don’t know. $15,000 maybe?

Me: The average cost of domestic adoption in the United States is $70,000 if you go through a private agency.

PL: Oh, I didn’t realize it was that much

Me: Yep, it’s really expensive. It can be more if you want a newborn straight from the hospital. Up to $120,000.

PL: Well, all life is precious.

Me: it really is. I’ve adopted through foster care and am currently a licensed foster parent. Would you be interested in becoming a foster parent yourself?

PL: Oh no I couldn’t do it.

Me: Why not?

PL: It would just be too much for me right now.

Me: Why is that?

PL: It would be too hard to handle all the issues that came with it. I’ve heard horror stories.

Me: Yep, it can be extremely difficult. But what if I told you that you were required by law to become a foster parent?

PL: what?

Me: what if you had to become a foster parent by law?

PL: they would never do that. That would never happen.

Me: Well, if a woman is forced to bear a child she doesn’t want, and she goes ahead and has that child, someone has to care for the child either through adoption or foster care. You have to do one of those two things.

PL: But I don’t want any more kids.

Me: So, you don’t want someone forcing you to have a child in your home that you don’t want or aren’t able to care for?

PL: no, that’s not my job to raise someone else’s child.

There it is folks. Have the baby, but we don’t want anything to do with it afterwards.

But let’s ban abortion…