Ascension Shock

It would seem I was induced into this state , ascension

shock, in 1989, profoundly …taken as mentally ill.

I note those out of alignment , or unbalanced …

As well as soooooo many heroically trying , for which

I am grateful , though silent as they surrender .

Unions don’t happen , Destiny and Divine Universal

Law, says sacred unions must have spiritually as their

foundation. I council and believe this after Karmic lessons

and much surrender .

I don’t fall for potential , or fixing someone, especially

Beloved .

Their light , their core , their joy and love does not

evade me .

Fear of the unknown , fear and shame are blockers

as are opinions vs “seeds “.

I have faith in empowered folks , watering , fertilizing

and giving love to their ” seeds ”

We are all seeds in gods hands …

©️ DonaLuna

🙏😘

www.youtube.com/watch

Borderline Personality – Craig Childress PsyD

Borderline pesonality disorder (BPD; although bipolar disorder is also called BPD), in this case we’re talking about what is called “borderline” personality disorder.

The whole field of personality disorders is highly problematic diagnostically because it was developed in the 1930s – 1960s, before we had a good understanding of what caused these types of characteristic “personality” patterns.
Beginning in the 1960s through to the 1990s we have come to learn that narcissistic and borderline “personality” pathologies are actually variants of the same underlying pathology, and both are the product of unresolved childhood attachment trauma, called complex trauma.
So the field of professional psychology in the 1990s and 2000s began to turn away from the “personality disorder” construct and began to anchor more fully into trauma, and unresolved trauma.
For borderline personality pathology, the unsolved trauma is often sexual abuse victimization as a child.  The other prominent source for developing the symptom pattern of “borderline” personality pathology is from being raised by a borderline mom (dads too, but women are more common for this type of symptom pattern, probably because women are more frequently victims of sexual abuse during childhood).
So for a large majority of the “borderline” pathology we may be looking at unresolved sexual abuse victimization in the childhood of the now-adult person.  If not sexual abuse, there is some other complex trauma in the background that is leading to the symptoms.
The symptoms are primarily a huge disturbance in self-concept, there’s a black hole of deep-insecurity and self-hatred that is extremely painful.  Its origins lay in the absence of parental love during childhood that would serve as the core to the child’s and then adult’s sense of fundamental self-value and self-worth.
The other primary symptom features is emotional dysregulation, particularly in intimate relationships, when the unresolved trauma from childhood creates such extreme anxiety that the person’s ability to regulate their emotions and behavior become disorganized.
One of the principle experts in borderline personality pathology is Dr. Marsha Linehan.  She was actually diagnosed as “borderline” in her young adulthood, and the field of professional psychology had zero understanding for what the pathology was and what to do about it.
So Marsha Linehan set about developing a treatment based on her personal path of recovery by combining CBT therapy (cognitive-behavioral therapy of skills instruction and development) with components of Eastern zen practice, particularly “mindfulness” practice that would release the person from certain elements of the complex trauma consequences.
Together, this Dialectic Behavior Therapy (DBT) helps the person process and resolve the otherwise unresolved trauma that disrupts their functioning.  DBT is considered evidenced-based practice, it is shown to be effective, and it is considered the standard of care for treatment of “borderline” personality disorder (unresolved complex trauma from childhood).
So I do not like the construct of “borderline” personality disorder. The DSM-5 tried to get rid of the personality disorder categories, but the Personality Disorder Subcommittee proposal was too radical for the general DSM-5 Committee, and it was rejected and placed as an Appendix in the DSM-5 for “further discussion.”
I use the construct because it has descriptive value, especially since it is a variant of the narcissistic personality pathology (unresolved childhood trauma with a different set of choices as to how the child coped).
I use them both to help organize people’s understanding of the pathogenic parenting, particularly… why we see five specific narcissistic personality traits in the child – they are the beliefs of the allied parent about the other… spouse… that are being transferred to the belief systems of the child (the shared persecutory delusion originating in the unresolved trauma anxiety of the parent triggered by the divorce; rejection and abandonment).
I would like to move away from those personality disorder diagnostic labels, and shift instead to discussing the trans-generational transmission of attachment trauma… but I’m facing such profound professional ignorance that I have to take them step-by-step into the established knowledge of professional psychology.
So if I’m talking about “personality disorders,” I’m using professional information sets from the 1960s to 1980s – nothing from the 1990s on.  I wish I could be talking from 2010s on, or even the 2000s. But I can’t.  These people in forensic psychology are simply too ignorant to have a professional conversation with them.
I have to first educate them before I can have a professional-level of discussion with them.  That should NOT be the case… but it is,
I apologize that my using information sets from the 1960s to 1980s will tend to misrepresent the complexity of the issues. I’ve worked trauma and foster care.  The people who are being identified as “borderline” are very often my sexually abused little girls that I treated in foster care through my clinic, who are now all grown up.
They are trauma survivors, and if not from childhood sexual abuse, then from some other form of complex trauma – relationship-based trauma – in childhood.  That childhood trauma is now rippling into the next generation… because it is not yet resolved.
We need to resolve the unresolved trauma in the family. That’s my focus, it’s time to end the trauma moving from generation to generation.  Moms are vital to the healthy development of their children. Dads are vital to the healthy emotional development of their children.  Let’s make that happen.
I agree with you.
Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, PSY 18857

Intimate Partner Violence

Let me address our relationship with women’s spousal abuse protection advocates and treatment providers (“domestic violence”), sometimes referred to as feminist philosophy. First, I am fully familiar with feminist philosophy and feminist therapy, it is one of the therapies in the Post-Modern social constructionist school, along with cultural therapy, solution-focused therapy, and narrative therapy. I understand “feminist philosophy” and I agree with it, and I support it. As for the spousal abuse protection advocates, I agree with them, and I support them. I’ve worked trauma and foster care, I’ve worked with IPV spousal abuse, I’ve helped develop and implement escape plans, and I’ve provided child and family therapy at rescue shelters. Dogs exist, and cats exist. The existence of one does not negate the existence of the other. This is fundamentally a form of IPV spousal abuse using the child as the weapon. Spousal abuse protection advocates are our ally, not the opposition

I am not sure who wrote this excellent piece

Dating your shadow

..Dating Your Shadow 
While we often use the word “partner,” this doesn’t require to you identify the person in question as the love of your life.   
….. This is because—from one crazy, cosmic, perspective—you are only and always and forever and indissolubly in relationship with your soulmate.   
If you’re single and dating, or merely rifling through Tinder on occasion, or scoping out people on the street—consider the fact that every single person you encounter, and especially in the context of dating, is revealing some aspect of your soulmate—precisely because they are revealing some aspect of you.  Especially if you consider them to be “definitely wrong for me in some way,” or massively triggering.  In fact, the more you get down with the people you consider bad, wrong, shameful, and totally dysfunctional to like, the more rapid this process tends to be.   
Basically, you can think of this process as “dating your shadow,” or “dating your own unconscious,” or “getting to know all the parts of yourself and your soulmate that your ego would rather not be.” 
The more deeply, powerfully, and effectively you learn to love all the “wrong” people, the sooner your “right” person is likely to reveal themselves —often hiding in plain sight, in our experience at least.   
And when they do, you will be super glad you practiced loving all the wrong people, because this insanely fabulous magical person of your dreams is, inevitably, going to appear as someone totally wrong and unlovable and your worst nightmare, on occasion—that is, the love of your life will also be a perfect match for your shadow.   
Thus, the more you’ve practiced radically, joyfully, ecstatically loving all the wrong people, in whatever way you choose, the better equipped you’ll be to transform those nightmare moments instantaneously into bliss.  Really. .
Carolyn Elliot and Carolyn Burns (both PhDs)

Lawyer helping as best he can, requesting more info

Here is a huge issue that I think needs to be addressed from family law attorney who represent this vulnerable population:

I don’t believe people lose their kids in family court for being bad parents. I think they lose their kids because an attorney has either financially drained them or they never had money for representation in the first place. 

Why don’t they have money? Because of how attorneys bill. So what is the solution. I started letting clients pay a fix small monthly rate they can afford that doesn’t affect my aggressiveness. I hardly make money as an attorney because of this. I do it because I believe in helping these people. 

The problem with legal aid and they might give free legal assistance but they have so many clients it’s hard to be aggressive with everyone’s case.

Being aggressive in these cases is imperative to train and give consequences to the alienating parent. 

So what  is the solution ? It seems the alienator will only comply when a consequence from the court is imposed….

I think we need reform in how family law attorneys bill?

I have idea and am trying to make it take off, I think I have some solutions…

Please offer ideas that involve immediate action, not just a complaint, an actual solution?

Sent from my iPad

Lawyers Deserve Correct FL info , especially in cases of PA

I am a family law attorney and new to this group. I have dealt with all types of custody situations and I joined mostly to listen and learn from people who are in difficult custody situations.  I ask the following question simply for information and not to anger or to start a big argument. I thank you in advance for your information. 
My understanding of parental alienation does not include difficult custodial parents who don’t communicate or keep the children from the other parent, but involves the custodial parent who engages in a course of conduct to convince the child the other parent is abusive (or whatever) such that the child hates the other parent and does not want to see him or her.  Is this the thinking of this group or is the group about broader difficult custody matters? 
I am not minimizing any difficult custody issues. I simply want to know the thinking of group members and whether all of the posts are about the more narrow issue or the broader problem. Thank you.
**Just to clarify about reading some comments – I know what parental alienation is, I simply want to know if that is the scope of this group or if the group addresses broader custody issues.

Childress On Legal Contact for Consultation

Any suggestions? No, I’m not a legal professional.
With that being said, If you write me a consultation letter briefly explaining your situation, like a hypothetical – assume these facts to be true – I can offer an opinion from clinical psychology – if the facts presented are true… I would be concerned about…
The issue for the court to decide is whether the facts presented in your consultation request from me are consistent with the facts in the case.
The issue is child psychological abuse. That is not a clearly defined or recognized pathology, although it is a recognized DSM-5 child abuse pathology by the American Psychiatric Association.
Child abuse is not something we should delay on.  We need clarity sooner rather than later.
The reason you are consulting me is because of my specialized expertise in child abuse pathology (Clinical Director for a three-university assessment and treatment center for kids in foster care) AND specifically in child psychological abuse.  You’d be hard-pressed to find a more advanced expert in child psychological abuse.
You sound concerned for your client that the severity of the child psychological abuse in this matter is not being properly identified (diagnosed is the psychology-word).  You are reaching out for additional consultation with a clinical psychologist expert in child psychological abuse – use my vitae for support.
Frame the – assume these facts to be true – for me.  I cannot make any statement out the actual family. I have not interviewed them.  I can provide you, as an attorney, with applied information from established clinical psychology surrounding your matter – assuming that what you tell me is true.
If you want, that would be my suggestion – pro bono – save the kid some money on their college education. drcraigchildress@gmail.com
I cannot render an opinion on a legal matter or legal strategy. I can apply the established knowledge of clinical psychology to a set of facts – assuming those facts are true.
If I personally conduct the assessment, I don’t need to assume anything.  I see the pathology directly.
Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, PSY 18857