Tag: Shaming

Inner Child Wounds

From the lived experience of our personal reality, our inner child wounds certainly are real, as they reek havoc throughout our lives and relationships causing much pain.

Our minds disconnect these traumatic painful events which, during our formative years, we are unable to process in a healthy emotional way. They are pushed into our subconscious minds where they wait, causing disruption from behind the curtain, until we have the conscious awareness and emotional fortitude to re-engage and heal them.

Once we release the emotional blockages, and hence the emotional charge of these suppressed memories, we gain awareness that they have no real power over us unless we continue to ignore and suppress them.

Through healing, we liberate our souls from the shackles of these subconscious mind constructs. The fear, pain, guilt, shame, etc., dissolves as it is incorporated and integrated into our conscious awareness. Once this perspective is reached, and healing is achieved, the memories and emotions are realized as illusionary constructs of a subconscious mind that used them to fortify the ego, in its own bid for control over its own illusionary existence.

The ego, from the perspective of a higher consciousness, exists to create its own illusions of false beliefs to challenge our soul’s full expression, which ego sees as a threat. We believe these illusions are real until we shine the light of our conscious awareness into the darkness of our subconscious ego mind.

The darkness then dissolves as it is brought into the light, and we become whole.

🤍

-JMB

Don’t shame yourself

Don’t ever

shame yourself

for showing up,

admitting or sharing,

only to be shutdown

or even ghosted.

To want to reach out

and describe your struggle

and be understood

is better than holding

it all painfully inside

and to never be seen.

It’s all humanly real.

The risk to be

honest and open.

The exposure from

connecting outside

vulnerability.

The enormous courage

it takes to let your

truth be revealed.

And know in turn,

not everyone can respond

in the way you expect

and believe —

or perhaps at all,

sometimes.

But, don’t ever

shame yourself.

Don’t diminish

your light

for expressing

or become conditioned

to not ask for help

in your time

of great need.

~ ‘Don’t Shame Yourself’ by Susan Frybort from the book ‘Look to the Clearing’ Poems to Encourage, Susan Frybort

~ Art by Jeanie Tomanek

Heavy Hearts 😢❤️ /Charlie McCready

Parents whose children have been coerced and manipulated to reject them carry a heavy heart. The pain of being unjustly and cruelly alienated from one’s own children is an emotionally devastating and deeply challenging cross to bear. Carrying on means persevering through difficult circumstances, remaining resilient in the face of adversity, and prioritising your well-being and personal growth. It involves finding ways to cope with the emotional pain, and seeking support from trusted individuals. It means getting on with your life but hoping your child will regain clarity and autonomy. Ultimately, carrying on despite this heavy burden is an act of resilience, love, and hope. It is a testament to your strength and determination to navigate the challenges of parental alienation while keeping your heart open for the possibility of reconciliation and a renewed connection with your children. You are AMAZING.

#charliemccready

#parentalalienationcoach

#parentalalienation

#parentalalienationawareness

#alienatedparent

Defining Parental Alienation

There is some debate surrounding the term “parental alienation” that reflects broader complexities within the realms of mental health, legal practice, and social dynamics. Let’s break it down:⁠

⁠

Parental Alienation: This term is recognised chiefly by those who have experienced it for themselves, it is a way for us to find each other in what otherwise is an isolating, traumatic experience. The term itself refers to a situation where one parent deliberately manipulates their child’s perception of the other parent, often leading to the child’s unjustified rejection or hostility towards that parent where, before separation or divorce, there existed a good, loving bond.⁠

⁠

Some renowned experts in the field prefer the term “attachment disorder” or “attachment-based parental alienation” to describe the dynamics seen in what others might label as “parental alienation.” The argument is that focusing on attachment disorders provides a more nuanced understanding of the underlying psychological mechanisms. Others criticise the term “parental alienation”, claiming it to be ‘debunked’ ‘pseudoscience’ which is misused in legal contexts. Certain women’s advocacy groups argue that the term “parental alienation” can be weaponized by abusive individuals, particularly men, to deflect accountability and continue exerting control over their former partners.⁠

⁠

However, with all this debate, we are divided rather than united in combating the real problem, which is partner/spousal and child psychological abuse. The focus should not solely be on debating semantics or labels but rather on addressing the actual harm inflicted upon children and families when one parent uses them as pawns in their own conflicts. Whether termed “parental alienation” or viewed through the lens of attachment disorders, the fundamental issue is the manipulation and abuse of children for personal gain or vengeance. By prioritizing the well-being of children and holding accountable those who engage in such harmful behaviours, we can work towards fostering healthier familial relationships and protecting vulnerable individuals from further harm.⁠

#charliemccready #9StepProgram #parentalalienationcoach #parentalalienationawareness #parentalalienationisreal #parentalalieantionischildabuse #parentalalienation #highconflictcoparenting #coparenting #coparentingwithanarcissist #highconflictdivorce #divorce #familylaw #familycourt #childabuse #narcissisticfather #narcissisticmother #narcissisticparent #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissist #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticpersonalitydisorder #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissism #narcissismawareness #alienatedchild #alienatedmother #alienatedparent #alienatedfather #

#alienated

“Black Sheep”

The so-called black sheep of the family are, in fact, hunters born of paths of liberation into the family tree.

The members of a tree who do not conform to the norms or traditions of the family system, those who since childhood have constantly sought to revolutionise beliefs, going against the paths marked by family traditions, those criticised, judged and even rejected, these are usually called to free the tree of repetitive stories that frustrate entire generations.

The black sheep, those who do not adapt, those who cry rebelliously, play a basic role within each family system, they repair, pick up and create new and unfold branches in the family tree.

Thanks to these members, our trees renew their roots. Its rebellion is fertile soil, its madness is water that nourishes, its stubbornness is new air, its passion is fire that re-ignites the light of the heart of the ancestors.

Uncountable repressed desires, unfulfilled dreams, the frustrated talents of our ancestors are manifested in the rebelliousness of these black sheep seeking fulfilment. The genealogical tree, by inertia will want to continue to maintain the castrating and toxic course of its trunk, which makes the task of our sheep a difficult and conflicting work.

However, who would bring new flowers to our tree if it were not for them? Who would create new branches? Without them, the unfulfilled dreams of those who support the tree generations ago would die buried beneath their own roots.

Let no one cause you to doubt, take care of your rarity as the most precious flower of your tree.

You are the dream of all your ancestors.

– Bert Hellinger

Find his books, and books on Family Constellations, here: https://amzn.to/4dDJX49

art | Monica Fernandez

https://www.instagram.com/monicafernandezb/?hl=en

#midwivesofthesoul #berthellinger #monicafernandez #blacksheep