In Japan, domestic violence survivors help victims – and abusers – CSMonitor.com

Domestic violence survivors are at the front of the charge to break women’s silence and end cycles of violence across Japan. They say compassion is their superpower.
— Read on www.csmonitor.com/World/Asia-Pacific/2023/1002/In-Japan-domestic-violence-survivors-help-victims-and-abusers

The bond between Narcissists, their Mom and their sisters

How many ways , I noted this and every attempt to discuss this unholy bond was pacified, often with ” well as a Christian” …

The children began to divorce , the youngest 1st , after a time of dating , then the eldest , which was a ” shit show ” and then I developed ” Bipolar ” , and with no support , nor intervention , 5 years into that toxic induction into the dank shadow , having hooked up with his twin , he left .

” I love you , but I’m not in love with you “, he walked away from our 3 children and me , never looking back,

Things got worse , and always he has had this connection with his sisters , his Mom deceased , his control, fading , his health is poor, and he keeps adding nails to his coffin, by perpetuating his hatred , his lies, projecting still it was all my fault.

He has poisoned so many folks against me and I have felt their hatred , and spite for decades..

It’s like he believes , he married down, from his level.. I sense I married out of my species .

With the abuse and alienation of our children and grandchildren, continuing, Divine has stepped in.. I sense he’s already feeling the ” side effects” of his actions , and there’s no intervention this time.

The cycle of control and dominance are over.. He can align himself with any one, anytime, on any level. 3 strikes and he’s out .

Pray our children wake , it’s totally up to them, however, I am moving on.. Grateful for having protection from the multi faceted cult that has prayed for my very death .

youtube.com/watch

Types of Flying Monkeys: The 2 Main Kinds of Narcissistic Enablers

Forward by Craig Childress , Psy D

Flying Monkeys & Social Distribution

The pathology in the family courts has many interesting and unique features. For one thing, the pathogen has motivation, it wants to create itself.

No other pathology has motivation to be the pathology. The autistic child doesn’t want to be autistic, ADHD doesn’t fight to remain ADHD, the person can’t help but produce the symptoms of the problem they’re having.

With this pathology, however, the pathology of the narcissistic-borderline-dark personality parent NEEDS to create the pathology in the child in order to create a false narrative – the trauma reenactment narrative – of a supposedly “abusive” targeted parent, the supposedly “victimized” child, and the supposedly “protective” allied parent.

But it’s all a false narrative created by the pathology in the narcissistic-borderline-dark personality parent, and it meets diagnostic criteria for both a shared persecutory delusion and a factitious (false) attachment pathology imposed on the child (FDIA).

Google factitious: artificially created or developed.

This is a false pathology. This is a pathology of lies.

If we try to alter what the pathological parents is seeking to do, i.e., if we try to change the false attachment pathology and promote bonding of the child to the targeted parent, the allied parent (and psychologically controlled child) will fight AGAINST treatment, seeking to keep the child’s pathology in place.

No other pathology (problem) fights AGAINST being solved, no other pathology wants to be the pathology. This pathology does.

As you examine in closer detail this unique and interesting motivational feature of this specific pathology, you’ll discover it’s because it’s ultimately an attachment trauma pathology that has crystallized into the personality disorder pathology of the parent – now being transferred to the child – the trans-generational transmission of attachment trauma.

The attachment system is a primary motivational system of the brain. Because this pathology is an attachment-trauma pathology, the damaged information structures in the person’s attachment networks (the pathogen) has access to the person’s motivational networks – it is a motivational pathology, a problem in the motivations for love-and-bonding (the attachment system).

Eating disorders also have this motivational feature, i.e., the motivation to remain eating disorders. Eating disorders are a pathology (problem) in another primary motivational system of the brain, the eating system. Eating disorders are a motivational pathology as well, just to a different primary motivational system.

The attachment system is a primary motivational system of the brain, the love-and-bonding motivational system. A child rejecting a parent is a problem in attachment bonding, it’s a motivational pathology surrounding love-and-bonding.

The pathology in the family courts has another unique and interesting feature – it’s shared between multiple people. It’s a shared delusional pathology. There’s no shared ADHD or shared autism, there’s not even a shared eating disorder – all the other pathologies are individual, the attachment system though, is a ‘shared’ relationship system.

Interestingly, it’s not simply shared between the pathological parent and the child. Once the false trauma reenactment narrative is established, other minds with the unresolved trauma seek to bond into the false narrative in the role of the “protective” other (in parallel to the pathological parent’s role as the “protective” parent).

These pathological people – extended family, mental health professionals, and random people – then become allies of the pathology in enacting the false narrative. In trauma-work this is called the “bystander” role.

There are four roles in child abuse: abusive parent, victimized child, protective parent, bystander.

The pathological bystanders attach as supposedly “protective” others to the false trauma reenactment narrative created by the pathological parent in order to work-through the unresolved attachment trauma of the bystander person.

In psychoanalytic terms, this is called their “counter-transference”.

This pathology seeks allies. No other pathology seeks and acquires allies who work to create and maintain the pathology. This pathology has a social distribution feature – it spreads from brain to brain and creates a shared thought disorder, a shared delusion.

Another important feature of this particular pathology is that it’s the abuse pathology – narcissistic personality pathology is the abuse pathology; child abuse and spousal abuse. It’s from the absence of empathy characteristic of the narcissistic personality. The absence of empathy is the capacity for cruelty (Baron-Cohen).

This pathology is immensely dangerous. This is the most dangerous pathogen on the planet – narcissistic-borderline-dark personalities are extremely dangerous people if you try to stop what they need to do – if you try to interfere with what their damaged motivational networks are requiring them to do.

If you try to stop the pathology of the narcissistic-borderline-dark personality human… they will attack you with great viciousness.

We can see all of these features displayed in the social surround in parallel process – same pathology. This isn’t politics, it’s pathology. I’m using the pathology’s display in the social surround to educate (those who can see) in the features of the pathology.

If you have the eyes to see, it can be helpful to understanding to see the pathology’s multiple features writ large across the public display.

There are allies like Lindsey Graham, Mitch McConnell, Kevin McCarthy, and Fox who work to enable the pathology to be enacted. Without their support, the Big Lie (the false narrative of persecution) would not exist and survive.

Then there’s another layer of ally. These are the dangerous stray humans who attach to the false narrative for their own darkly malevolent and sadistic purposes. These are the Proud Boys spectrum of allies – these are the SA of Nazi Germany – these are the flying monkey spectrum of allies.

They swarm around and abuse anyone who is trying to alter the enactment of the pathology. They seek to destroy the person professionally and personally through slander, false allegations, and lies.

I first encountered the flying monkey phenomenon surrounding Dorcy Pruter. The pathology and its flying monkey allies have been inflicting abuse on Dorcy for year-and-years. She’s been abused with slander, hostility, and lies her entire time in the family courts because she successfully fixes the breached attachment bond.

The pathogen hates Dorcy… for a reason. She sees it. She fixes it.

Despite all the abuse Dorcy’s endured for the sake of the children and their parents, she’s still standing, which says a lot about the quality of person she is – and – she’s not only still standing, she’s successful.

Stupid pathogen.

When I first recognized that Dorcy had the solution in her hip-pocket with the High Road workshop, and the extent of the flying monkey abuse she endured as a result, I tried to give her all the professional protection I could from my degree-status.

If the flying monkeys wanted to destroy her, they had to get through Dr. Childress first, that provided some layer of protection, but not nearly enough. No one should have to endure the abuse that the professionals seeking to solve the pathology in the family courts have to endure.

We know what the pathology is. We know about flying monkeys. We know that narcissistic-borderline-dark personality pathology is the most dangerous pathology on the planet. We need the APA to get over here. Clinical psychology needs to return to court-involved custody conflict.

But they won’t come, they will refuse because it is too dangerous to their licenses, and after 40 years of being absent from the family courts, none of the clinical psychologists are competent in this court involved factitious attachment and delusional thought disorder pathology created by a narcissistic-borderline-dark personality parent.

With this pathology, it’s not enough to simply identify the pathology, we must also identify – by name – its allies who are supporting and enabling the pathology to exist. The doctors need to be doctors and clearly identify (diagnose) the child abuse and spousal abuse involved… and the doctors will need protection from retaliation.

How do we protect the doctors? Professional psychology tried an experiment with you, they gave you your own “sub-discipline” of psychologists called “forensic” psychologists and then gave them authority to do whatever they wanted to protect themselves.

The forensic psychologists protect themselves from retaliation by exempting themselves from all ethical standards of practice and accountability. The forensic psychologists are allowed by licensing boards to self-review their own… and they all do the same thing.

They cover-up for the unethical malpractice of other forensic psychologists… because they all do the same thing. The licensing boards are corrupted by the influence of the forensic psychologists. How do you think things got so bad here?

No oversight – no meaningful scrutiny (NY Blue Ribbon Commission on Forensic Custody Evaluations).

It’s a mess, and it’s immensely dangerous for any clinical psychologist – or anyone – to try to help you. We need to substantially elevate the standards of practice for psychologists practicing in the family courts – and we need to protect them.

How do we protect them? We need an agreed upon diagnostic assessment and treatment protocol of the highest caliber that accurately diagnoses the pathology for treatment and the court.

This is active child a abuse – DSM-5 V995.51 Child Psychological Abuse. This is active spousal abuse using the child as the weapon – DSM-5 V995.82 Spouse or Partner Abuse, Psychological. The doctors need to return an accurate diagnosis 100% of the time so we can protect the children and their parents.

We have obligations.

How do the psychologists protect themselves? By making an accurate and supported diagnosis that can be verified by second-opinion. We should be generating second opinion (or even third opinion) consultations are all child abuse diagnoses returned in the family courts.

We have the Internet – tele-health consultation is easily available. We, the psychologists, need to go in as pairs. Consultation always improves the quality of healthcare services received.

This is the most dangerous pathogen on the planet. It’s in the family courts. It is cruel and abusive – it is narcissistic, psychopathic, manipulative, delusional, retaliatory, and sadistic…

…and it is currently undiagnosed and untreated.

We need focused attention paid to the family courts from professional psychology – from the APA – we have obligations. We are failing our obligations to the court, to the parents, and to the children.

Children, parents, and professionals are being abused daily surrounding the pathology in the family courts, and it is not being addressed. This is active child abuse. This is active spousal abuse. This is active professional abuse.

And no one is stopping it… yet.

Accountability is coming for the enabling allies. Many of the Jan 6 flying monkeys have been sentenced to jail. We need accountability in the family courts – we need to hold the forensic psychologists accountable for their unethical malpractice, and clinical psychology accountable for their abandonment of these children and parents.

We need to fix things. We can do that, we just need the motivation. This is a motivational pathology.

Craig Childress, Psy.D.

Clinical Psychologist, CA PSY 18857

A flying monkey is someone who enables a narcissists campaign of abuse. Here are the two main types of flying monkey and how to spot them.
— Read on www.narcissisticabuserehab.com/types-of-flying-monkeys/

Incompetent and Unethical – Craig Childress, PsyD

I think I’m going to talk about your surrounding mental health professionals this Sunday over Coffee & Crumpets w/ Dr. Childress here on Facebook Live.

What do you do about the involved mental health people surrounding you? They might be custody evaluators (I hope not), they might be “reunification therapists” (there’s no such thing), they might be individual child therapists who are colluding and participating in the psychological abuse of the child.

What do you do about them? I should talk about that this Sunday over coffee.

You want documentation of their diagnosis and treatment plan. They don’t have one and they will resist telling you what their diagnosis and treatment plan is – BUT – you will want to challenge their diagnosis as a misdiagnosis and you will want a second opinion.

Think healthcare – think medical doctors. If the doctor says you have cancer and you don’t think so, what do you do? You get a second opinion. That’s what you want to do, you want a second opinion on their diagnosis because you believe they have misdiagnosed (misidentified) the pathology (problem) in your family.

And they have. The pathology in the family courts is a shared (induced) persecutory delusion and false (factitious) attachment pathology imposed on the child by a pathological narcissistic-borderline- dark personality parent.

Did the involved mental health professionals conduct a proper risk assessment for possible child abuse to the appropriate differential diagnosis for each parent?

No they did not.

Did the involved mental health professionals conduct a proper assessment for a possible shared (induced) persecutory delusion?

No they did not.

Did the involved mental health professionals misdiagnose (misidentify) the pathology (problem) in the family?

Yes, they did.

Was it a negligent misdiagnosis?

Google negligent: failing to take proper care in doing something.

The allied parent is accusing the targeted parent of abusive-range parenting that is creating the child’s attachment pathology toward the targeted parent – a two-person attribution of causality.

The targeted parent is accusing the allied parent of psychologically abusing the child by creating a shared (induced) persecutory delusion and factitious attachment pathology in the child for secondary gain to the pathological allied parent – a three-person triangle attribution of causality.

A proper risk assessment for possible child abuse needs to be conducted to the appropriate differential diagnosis for each parent. Was a proper risk assessment conducted by the involved mental health professionals?

No. You will want to begin the process of exposing their negligent misdiagnosis resulting from their practice beyond the boundaries of their competence in 1) the diagnostic assessment of delusional thought disorders, 2) their diagnostic assessment and treatment of attachment pathology, and 3) their diagnostic assessment and treatment of family systems pathology.

All ethics codes for all professionals have Standards prohibiting practice beyond the boundaries of competence based on their education, training, and experience.

The assessment for a possible persecutory thought disorder is a Mental Status Exam of thought and perception – Martin, 1990 – they are dead in the water.

Mental Status Exam
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK320/

Their additional absence of competence in attachment pathology and family systems layers on additional violations to ethical standards of practice.

Because they are incompetent, they have misdiagnosed the pathology in the family and are treating cancer with insulin… and the patient is dying because of their negligent (failure to take proper care) misdiagnosis.

You will want to begin collecting your documentation to challenge their diagnosis and subsequent “treatment” plan by obtaining their diagnosis and treatment plan… in writing.

They will resist. They must disclose their diagnosis and treatment plan. Ask for a Treatment Progress Update report, then watch them avoid providing one.

You will need to become familiar with the laws in your state regarding disclosure of information – if you share consent rights for the child’s treatment, then you have the right to know what the child’s diagnosis and treatment plan are.

Think healthcare – think medical problems. If your child has a medical problem, you have the right to know what the diagnosis and treatment plan is. Same exact thing, you don’t need to prove something to someone, you just need them to do their job.

What is their diagnosis and treatment plan? Get that in writing. Then challenge it as a misdiagnosis because they failed to conduct a proper risk assessment to the appropriate differential diagnosis for each parent.

Understand this… if they believe a shared delusion, they become PART of the shared delusion, they become part of the pathology. When that pathology is child abuse, they become PART of the child abuse – they – the involved mental health people become participants in the psychological abuse of the child…

…because they are practicing beyond the boundaries of their competence in violation of ethical standards of practice for their profession.

I should talk about that this Sunday over coffee, what do you do about your involved mental health people?

You have rights. They have obligations.

A patient should NEVER have to explain the pathology to the doctor, they should already know. If you have to explain the pathology, document that you are explaining it to them – learn Letter to a Stranger.

WrightsLaw Letter to a Stranger
https://www.wrightslaw.com/advoc/articles/Letter_to_Stranger.html

You’re not writing to the involved mental health person, you’re documenting them into the record for the magistrate who will hear their malpractice lawsuit, or board complaint, or court testimony.

Plan ahead. The pathogen can’t. Stop being now-reactive. You’re the healthier parent. We need your leadership for the family. You need support. Let’s get you the support you need.

We’ll start by getting rid of the incompetent and unethical child abusing mental health people that surround you. The mental health professional should NEVER be a participant in the psychological abuse of their client-child… but they are.

They deserve to lose their licenses for practice beyond the boundaries of competence in violation of ethical standards, resulting in their collusive participation in the psychological abuse of the child… and the spousal psychological abuse of the targeted parent.

You have rights. They have obligations. We’ll talk more on Sunday over coffee here on Facebook Live at 8:00 Pacific.

Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, CA PSY 18857

Got Flowers today

Got Flowers Today

I got flowers today. It wasn’t my birthday or any other special day. We had our first argument last night. He said a lot of cruel things that really hurt me. I know he was sorry and didn’t mean the things he said. Because I got flowers today.

I got flowers today. It wasn’t our anniversary or any other special day. Last night, he threw me into a wall and started to choke me. It seemed like a nightmare. I couldn’t believe it was real. I woke up this morning sore and bruised all over. I know he must be sorry Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today. It wasn’t Mother’s Day or any other special day. Last night, he beat me up again. And it was much worse than all other times. If I leave him, what will I do? How will I take care of my kids? What about money? I’ m afraid of him and scared to leave. But I know he must be sorry Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today. Today was a very special day. It was the day of my funeral. Last night he finally killed me. He beat me to death.

If only I had gathered enough courage and strength to leave him, I would not have gotten flowers today.

This poem is dedicated to all the victims and survivors of Domestic Violence.

You ask, why didn’t she leave?

I ask, why did he hit?

Communication with a Narcissist

After recent business conversations , including meetings , I have decided no contact is a must …

TO US, LANGUAGE IS A TOOL OF COMMUNICATION….to a narc, language is a tool of deception, abuse, manipulation, and control. That’s why you have to listen carefully and decode what a narc says. (He or She)

Annie Kaszina says: “Narcissists win you with their – lying, falsely loving – words and then destroy you with their – abusive – words.

That doesn’t happen by chance. They are master manipulators. Whether they are academically bright or educationally challenged, they use language, quite deliberately, to make you fear and obey them.

Often they say that they are not good with language. They use that and other similar ploys because they know how easy it is to dupe you.

They know that you will be slow to believe who they truly are – not least because you don’t want to believe that people like that not only exist but share your home and your bed.

You have to listen to What a Narcissist says and get confident about translating it correctly so that you discern their true agenda.

Whatever they say to you is only ever about safeguarding their best interests at your expense.

When did you realize what the narcissist was saying was manipulation?

For me, the light bulb first went on when I saw the Narcissist planning what he would say to the couples’ counselor… and what a fabulous victim story that was.”