Tag: abuse

Your truth , when you are ready

YOU DO NOT “ATTRACT” ABUSE

We may, through no fault of our own, have been conditioned to believe that we are basically inferior, flawed, wrong, bad, or broken at our core, and therefore we cannot trust our own internal guidance system.

We may, through no fault of our own, be somewhat out of touch with our own intuition, our deepest truth, the Knowing in our guts.

We may, therefore, through no fault of our own, be drawn to narcissistic, charismatic, manipulative beings—friends, partners, family members, spiritual teachers, therapists, leaders.

Why? Their treatment of us, and others, feels… so… familiar.

They feel close, like family.

Like mummy. Like daddy.

We ‘know’ them. Their manipulative patterns, however harmful, are known to us, predictable, ‘safe’.

Their ways feel like… home.

Their control and abuse feel like… love.

Or at least, what we sadly have come to expect of love.

We do not ‘attract’ abuse, no matter what the new-age spiritualities and pop psychologies tell us. Abuse and violence are never our fault, and we never deserve it. Nobody does.

But we may, through no fault of our own, ignore our deepest feelings, our boundaries, our authentic yearnings, our alarm bells and red flags, our authentic doubts and discernments, and suppress that wise, loving inner voice that says, “You deserve much, much better than this.”

Or even, “Get out.”

When we are disconnected from our deepest sense of self-worth and sovereignty, we may, in some cases, ‘allow’ others to treat us badly, overstep our boundaries, intrude, and objectify.

We may silence our NO. We may tolerate certain behaviors, not speak up or fight back (and I acknowledge that in some cases it is utterly impossible to fight back, and we are intelligent to keep ourselves safe in any way we can).

We are wired to stay with the “safety” of what we know, with the familiar, with the original ‘family’, and the original ‘sin’ (mythologically speaking).

Our nervous systems are literally trying to spare us from the perceived danger of change, of leaving the pack, and setting off on our own. We tend to cling to what we know, even if it’s harming us.

This is the legacy of trauma.

And then, one day, we begin to wake up. We finally begin to listen to that inner NO, and we forge ahead towards the true safety… of the Unknown and the Unexplored.

It takes immense courage to speak up. It takes immense courage to leave a guru, an abusive partner, a family member, or a cult. It takes immense courage to finally honor what our guts have been telling us for so long. To listen to our deepest inner guidance, and express our authentic anger. To listen to our loving inner parent, and to honour and protect our precious inner child.

We do not ‘attract’ abuse.

We are not, through any fault of our own, ‘manifesting’ maltreatment, or even ‘evil’, through negative vibrations or through our misaligned or wrong feelings or thoughts.

We may, however, be silencing the holy scream in our guts, the sacred rage of the inner child, the part of us that KNOWS. Therein lies our power and our healing. Whatever has been suppressed can be expressed again, and whatever has been shut down can blossom once more.

Break down some walls.
Offend some people.
Make a mess.
Speak your truth.

When you are ready.

And not a moment before.

  • Jeff Foster

Camille – Visionary , Died in a mental hospital

Born in 1864, died in 1943—forgotten by the world, left to languish in a mental hospital.

What was her story?

She came to Paris to study art at a time when the prestigious École des Beaux-Arts was open only to men. Undeterred, she joined studios that welcomed women. There, she met and became the lover of the celebrated sculptor Auguste Rodin. Their relationship was one of fiery passion and shared artistry—they created side by side, their collaborative genius preserved in works housed today in the Rodin Museum and Musée d’Orsay.

But Rodin, already entangled in a long-standing relationship with another woman, eventually left Camille. As his reputation soared, hers plummeted. She was scorned, shunned, and dismissed—not just as a lover but as an artist. Alone, distrusting, and out of favor, she struggled to sell her works.

Adding to her isolation, her brother, the renowned poet and diplomat Paul Claudel, played a pivotal role in her downfall. Camille, seen as “too modern” and a source of familial shame, was forcibly institutionalized by her family. For 30 years, she fought to explain the injustice of her confinement, writing anguished letters to friends and family, pleading for release. Her clarity and heartbreak resonate in these preserved writings.

On October 19, 1943, Camille Claudel died of malnutrition in a French hospital. No family members attended her funeral, and her body was buried in a common grave.

Decades later, the world has finally recognized her brilliance. Her legacy has been restored: her sculptures now stand proudly beside Rodin’s, and a museum near Paris is dedicated entirely to her work.

Camille Claudel is no longer forgotten. She is honored as the visionary she always was.

Narcissism

When you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, there will always be another secret life going on behind your back.

This is because these people are very empty, and they need stimulation from multiple sources just to face existence. They’ll be doing drugs or pornography. They’ll be stringing multiple partners through flirting and emotional affairs. They will be chasing financial intrigue that occasionally gets them into scams and trouble.

The reason they must flirt with other people is also because they’re seeking to move on to other people who don’t know the games they play.

They know they’ll get bored with you eventually, or you’ll learn to resist their shenanigans. And since being alone would kill them, they begin to groom possible replacements among anyone whom they can charm.

You’ll also notice this habit of making promises to you and then using those promises as a dangling carrot to get compliance from you. If you don’t do what they want, they’ll withdraw the promise.

Sometimes, they’ll deny having promised at all, or they postpone it until you give up. The truth is that they never intended to fulfill it in the first place.

Narcissists have lost all sense of right and wrong. Everything is about satisfying themselves.

When you finally leave, they’ll circle back to you, pretending to be checking on you when actually they’re checking if they still have access.

If you have a child with them, they would weaponise that child to torture you until you cut them off totally or you manage to enforce boundaries with the help of the law.

But the child will be scarred or wasted by the counter parenting and objectification from the narcissist.

Society knows very little about narcissists.

Sometimes, you stay because you fear the pain of letting go until you realize the pain you’re already taking for holding on.

Other times, you think you’re staying for the children until you realize that the narcissist is turning all of them into other small narcissists and broken empaths.

Your solution is to recognize that this person is incapable of peace. They’re only excellent at pretending and confusing you.

You will never have a life until you detach from them and direct your life towards wholeness and emotional stability.

Credit to original poster.

Inner Child Wounds

From the lived experience of our personal reality, our inner child wounds certainly are real, as they reek havoc throughout our lives and relationships causing much pain.

Our minds disconnect these traumatic painful events which, during our formative years, we are unable to process in a healthy emotional way. They are pushed into our subconscious minds where they wait, causing disruption from behind the curtain, until we have the conscious awareness and emotional fortitude to re-engage and heal them.

Once we release the emotional blockages, and hence the emotional charge of these suppressed memories, we gain awareness that they have no real power over us unless we continue to ignore and suppress them.

Through healing, we liberate our souls from the shackles of these subconscious mind constructs. The fear, pain, guilt, shame, etc., dissolves as it is incorporated and integrated into our conscious awareness. Once this perspective is reached, and healing is achieved, the memories and emotions are realized as illusionary constructs of a subconscious mind that used them to fortify the ego, in its own bid for control over its own illusionary existence.

The ego, from the perspective of a higher consciousness, exists to create its own illusions of false beliefs to challenge our soul’s full expression, which ego sees as a threat. We believe these illusions are real until we shine the light of our conscious awareness into the darkness of our subconscious ego mind.

The darkness then dissolves as it is brought into the light, and we become whole.

🤍

-JMB