Tag: family

Involuntary Commitment for Substance Use Leads to Relapse

Yep, it’s like jail, with nothing corrected , one returns to what one knows .

The system is broken, no checks , no balances .

Lots of mentally ill in jails and prisons , homeless , dumped due to lack of psychiatric hospitals , poverty , and incorrect treatments , toxic meds that adversely affect mind, body and socially…

So until we treat mind, body , spirit , nutritionally balance them, and give them as much support and faith as possible , we have failed

” mental health ” as we treat “behavioral” health .

A dehydrated individual , can present as ” crazy ” ..alcohol dehydrates , and one can appear drunk , when dehydrated . Thyroid can really throw out vibes of mental illness , and the very medications prescribed can induce what looks like mental illness .

Trauma can be the root cause of what’s labeled mental illness . And labeling can arise when a psychiatrist ignores these facts and laughs off side effects because his book of stats tells him it’s 4 out of a hundred that are adversely affected horrifically , leading to more professionals , more time, more money for treatments .. A pyramid…

It must end ..

It’s co joined twins , Big Pharma $$$$, AMA$$$$,and APA $$$$, and lots in between , termed The Industry of Death , destroying and erasing families, distorting realities , creating customers ..

It is ending ..

A new study found that patients involuntarily committed for substance use disorder relapsed within the first year after release.
— Read on www.madinamerica.com/2023/07/involuntary-commitment-for-substance-use-disorder-leads-to-poor-outcomes/

Intergenerational trauma: How to identify it and how to start healing – The Washington Post

The idea that trauma can be passed across generations can be a difficult to grasp. But just as trauma can be passed through generations, so can resilience.
— Read on www.washingtonpost.com/wellness/2023/06/12/generational-trauma-passed-healing/

Single Mom is better than Married Single Mom

Felt this a lot , and it got much worse

Omg, yes!! I would listen to friends who would be sad or complain when their husband’s were out of town. I didn’t have a paradigm for it. 🤷🏻‍♀️ My life was significantly EASIER when he was out of town. I enjoyed him being gone because I felt less anxiety and had so much less work to do. He didn’t add to my life. He just sucked the life out of me. Being single was SO much better.

Amused by your suffering – NPD

Sherri Campbell PhD

So much of how we cope in our emotionally dysfunctional family is to become absolutely dedicated to gathering the facts and details of our side of any problem. In gathering our facts, we trick ourselves into believing that we will be able to prove our side, speak our truth, and be heard.

What we need to learn is that emotional abusers purposely leave incriminating evidence in your life because they want to fight with you. They want you to try and prove yourself, your side, and your facts. They live for the chaos of this type of attention, drama, and conflict. Conflict makes them feel invigorated and alive. For them conflict is a source of pure satisfaction and entertainment.

The teaching to take is that a normal human being does not like to see other people, especially those closest to them, suffer. Sadly, emotional abusers view the suffering they cause to their victims as a source of pure amusement.

Taking care of Maya – Netflix movie in Child Psychological Abuse / Parental Alienation

Trigger warning, this story is now on Netflix. It’s about alienation, false allegations, and a system abusing authority.

It’s called …Taking Care of Maya.

Now the family is exposing the system and filed a lawsuit for Justice.

Clearing the past abuse , Child Psychological Abuse/ Parental Alienation

I made plenty of mistakes , medications played havoc with me on all levels .

I used to go through pictures , and as the family photographer, there were tons , and it broke my heart each time.

I kept hearing so much blame and hurt , that I divided up photos and gave each child a portion.

I still had photos , which have been stored for 14 months .

I have pictures and memories a plenty and no interest in healthier relationships , preferring to stay in the energy of negativity , which does not fit me and my personal effort of healing

When I was at rock bottom, I put away all photographs of my children that I had scattered around my house. It was incredibly hard, and sad, but almost a ritualistic thing, I felt I had to stop holding onto the past. Not only this but they were by then teenagers, and the photographs were from when they were much younger, happier days before alienation put a dreadful, painful, heartbreaking barrier between us. I didn’t realise it at the time because I hadn’t yet embarked upon a healing journey that would lead to me running my programme to help others, but this marked a new start, a clean slate, and the end of my longing for the past, and being stuck in grief. I packed up those photographs in a box which I put in my attic. Gone but not forgotten> Not a part of present life. A part of my life, but presently apart from each other. It was accepting and facing up to reality. My children returned of their own volition. They returned to a parent who wasn’t angry or stuck in the past, but instead living a happy, fulfilling life. I realised later, they would have been relieved not to have a parent making them feel guilty, ashamed, or sad. We could all move on. I know there’s a huge temptation to address the wrongs of the past, but we can’t change it. There might be an opportunity, but I always say it is a ‘handle with care’ situation. If you have the chance to have a new start with your alienated child/ren, don’t let the past overshadow it. Believe me, I made my mistakes, which I cover in my programme, easy-to-avoid mistakes. I do what I can now to help others fast-track to better relationships.

In the book, The Light Between Oceans by M.L. Stedman which was turned into a film starring Alicia Vikanda and Michael Fassbender, a couple on an isolated island, unable to have children, are blessed with the miracle ‘gift from God’ delivery of baby washed up in a boat with a dead man. The wife implores her husband not to report this as he would like to as is his job as a lighthouse keeper. Against his better judgement, they keep the baby. ‘We’re not doing anything wrong,’ she says. What’s interesting with regard to parental alienation is that the film throws some light on the immorality of keeping a child away from a loving, living parent. The main character feels it is her right to keep the child after all she’s suffered, even when she discovers the mother is grieving her lost child (and husband). There’s a happy ending in this film with the stolen child returned to her rightful mother, albeit this mother is from a rich family and has the means to press charges. If she was impoverished it would be a different story. This is what is so dreadfully wrong with alienation. A parent shouldn’t have to pay (a small fortune) to have access to their child which is then often not honoured by the alienating parent anyway. “You only have to forgive once. To resent, you have to do it all day, every day,” says the birth mother in her decision to forgive the couple, even though her child hardly knew her with all the difficulties that would entail.

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Adult Survivors of Child Psychological Abuse

“Through my own healing I’ve learned that “bad behavior“ of a child in a toxic family system is more than likely a healthy, natural reaction to antagonistic emotional games. Unfortunately, when you were a child there was no way for you to conceptualize this. In toxic family systems, emotional games are used in lieu of the time, love, attention, parenting, or bonding required to make children feel healthy and secure. Because of this deep insecurity, you leave childhood inexperienced in love, highly experienced in fear, and feeling deeply ashamed of who you are, with no understanding as to why. It is essential to understand the whys of the person you have become.

Healing core wounds starts with your efforts to rewire the way you think and feel about yourself.

Deprogramming psychological abuse is a critical step in your healing. Brush past this step, and the lies you have been told about who you are will continue to hold you hostage to your feelings of insecurity long after you have separated from your abusers. Deprogramming involves unpacking the trauma that created your core wounds. You must identify your abusers and examine the lies that they programmed you to believe about yourself so you can start telling yourself a more honest narrative.” – Sherrie Campbell, PhD

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Tools of the toxic family

Sherrie Campbell PhD

A favorite manipulative tool
toxic family members use is to create holy-hell for us one day, and move on the next as if nothing happened.

They will stonewall, yell, and disregard our existence one moment, and in the next moment criticize us for having a “bad attitude.” When our family members create this type of chaos, nothing ever gets resolved. We quickly learn that when they move on as if nothing happened it is better to move on with them because confronting them only stands to rob us of even more of peace.

Sadly, the more we suppress our feelings the unhealthier we become, yet, it is not worth it to confront. It simply doesn’t work.

The healthiest move we can make is to remove these familial chaos-creators from our life by slowly but consistently, and with commitment, distancing ourselves from them, until there is no longer a connection.

Sons & Fathers

“Boys don’t hunger for fathers who will model traditional mores of masculinity. They hunger for fathers who will rescue them from it. They need fathers who have themselves emerged from the gauntlet of their own socialization with some degree of emotional intactness.

Sons don’t want their father’s ‘balls,’ they want their hearts. And, for many, the heart of a father is a difficult item to come by. The key component of a boy’s healthy relationship to his father is affection, not ‘masculinity.’ The boys who fare poorly in their psychological adjustment are not those without fathers, but those with abusive or neglectful fathers.

Contrary to the traditional stereotype, a sweet man in an apron who helps out with the housework may be just the nurturant kind of father a boy most needs.”

~Terrence Real, I Don’t Want To Talk About It:

Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression

Art: William Roby

https://williamroby.pixels.com/

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