His Hero Instinct And Why It Matters – Feeling Butterflies

I’m a seed planter , Dream Weaver, a woman of deep

faith , who sadly finds my efforts dormant in masculine

energy that sees need as a form of control.

I don’t ask for favors , and now have resources to locate

what I need for a specific issue. That’s less and less.

In my youth, the masculine had no chores , nothing but free

time. I was unable to discern the trauma of my brother

who was Casper around our house. His freedom was wide

open , gifts were noticeably focused on that , and I was

a very reluctant caretaker. I say reluctant , due to Mom’s

just do it example , and siblings resistance to my ineptitude

or my correctness, setting up a no win foundation on shaky


I went into my 1st at age 17 , with a boy who had many secrets

like brother..I had no idea how profoundly and deeply these secrets

pointed to trauma. It was hard to acknowledge , as I ended contact

with 1st after 9 months of not so wedded bliss.

A soul mate had major issues with fidelity , did not want to loose

me , and to break the soul mate connection , I married a 2nd time

exiting after 3 weeks , upon the realization of I was expected to

take the role of breadwinner , sex kitten…umm no.

Of course the hologram, that describes ” former” champions

secrets , in a mind -soul game he still thinks works.. Truth is

definitely not his forte’, and that is light to me. The official

moment of commitment , a shift began that I allowed was

a comfortable easy feeling. That, ended as our 1 st year brought

us our 1st child , leaving no doubt of his holding such shadow

that induced me to cleave into my child and domestic duties .

However , I rebelled or stood up , listened to his 3rd person

stories and slowly lost respect for his inability to rise over

the Peter Pan lifestyle ..Staying in C-PTSD with children

to raise , convincing myself I was in love to get through

things , compliant and hopeful in his self growth.. Sadly,

that hasn’t happened, and having based his future on a faked

past is the revelation that sets our family free .

I don’t have great expectations beyond that…it would be foolish

to consider all negatives ended , or wounds healed . Letting

go , surrendering this is not something that has ever been offered

me in fact , in truth , in forgiveness or love.. I will be willing

certainly to be part of healing reconciliation, when it is

important to the other party , whose over the blame and shame

cycle .

Secrets are deadly, and those whose way of life chooses this

path , don’t trust ..anything or anybody.. it’s very unbalanced .

My hero instinct is very real, I am not shy about saying .

How that’s received is variable, however without asking

in discussion , my needs are side stepped, ignored or deferred,

has been normalized in masculines around me ; as a strong

woman, I have or will have it covered …Complementing

and holding space , for imbalances to correct themselves

so masculine’s needs are met , he’s feeling supported and

not uneasy , or controlled ..

Transforming this is most welcome .. certainly it shall

aide in losing shame and projection of shame and blame.

His Hero Instinct And Why It Matters – Feeling Butterflies
— Read on feelingbutterflies.com/his-hero-instinct-and-why-it-matters-85/

Of 27 Deadliest Mass Shooters, 26 of Them Were Fatherless | RealClearPolitics

Note this statistic

Of 27 Deadliest Mass Shooters, 26 of Them Were Fatherless | RealClearPolitics
— Read on www.realclearpolitics.com/2018/02/27/of_27_deadliest_mass_shooters_26_of_them_were_fatherless_435596.html

When the kind parent is the targeted scapegoat

Tears flowed freely reading this , so much has been

evoked, and still each stands as is, not one true act

of family..quite the opposite …still.. Self revealing

and bound , with holding in secrets that uphold lies

and abuses sanctioned and supported in a corruption

of souls that decided I should be targeted .

Judges and critics , mentored children to dispose of me

and their survival required my living death . It’s very

hard to ignore , as my finances have been adversely affected

and still he threatens .

Adult Children with Cluster B personalities tend to use and abuse loving parents. Learn how to help them and yourself by setting healthy lifestyle boundaries.
— Read on flyingmonkeysdenied.com/2016/04/15/when-the-kind-parent-is-the-targeted-scapegoat/

How Narcissistic Parents Infantilize Kids | Psychology Today

This perfectly explains the dynamics I have been

aware of since Mid year 1978 , after sharing our joy

and witnessing the immaturity , and projected

blame of a man who had known this dynamic for

his entire life.

Typically saving the storied that solidified a lifestyle

that afforded a connection to call and a resolution

to all acceptance of responsibility. As our children

were abused in GM’s care, I have no doubt of physical

and mental abuse that was supported by money as

a god. I was , along with our sons were considered a

drain , financially , and slowly that combined with

drink , and sex addictions, with adverse parenting that

was more ” uncle” that dad. Partnership was with the

mother, never me, nor the ” replacement” , and of course

neither were ” liked” by mom , only tolerated until

shredding the completion .

Affluence, memberships, religious afflictions , secrets abound

with the constant projection of blame at any target . Our sons

and DIL have been ” targeted ” as well, depending on what’s

going on at the time. Vampires, emotionally , spiritually

who choose to remain ignorant and defensive of any

and all responsibility , considering my demise completed

old history .. Hero’s , the mom and son, who ” saved ” our

children by killing me alive , to save their abuse secrets

lies, begetting more lies..

Very comfortable that money and connections are their

constant out, which has been supported by professionals

who choose to do that in a network of dank dark shadow.

Narcissists as parents create children who themselves can develop their own problems. New research shows how infantilization plays out when those children grow up.
— Read on www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201810/how-narcissistic-parents-infantilize-kids

Parental Alienation = Emotional Child Abuse …As an Intuitive it’s Soul Snatching


The Lack of Gentle Platonic Touch in Men’s Lives is a Killer – The Good Men Project

I see it, I feel it, it resonates , please read 🦉🤓

Mark Greene explores how in American culture, men avoid all contact rather than risk even the hint of causing unwanted sexual touch.
— Read on goodmenproject.com/featured-content/megasahd-the-lack-of-gentle-platonic-touch-in-mens-lives-is-a-killer/

MIA Survey: Ex-patients Tell of Force, Trauma and Sexual Abuse in America’s Mental Hospitals – Mad In America

Nightmare come to life for me, patients

robbing a wealthy patient of her precious

jewlery , dental patients who had all teeth

removed at once .

A diabetic who had both legs amputated.

An El-Vira co patient on watch , who attempted

to choke me to death 1st night in..

Not a healing place

Added trauma , Added Abuse , I went home

changed and rearranged , knowing how

unsupported I was , owing my abuse , I

took my fragmented self home, to

” comply” as a wife, and to mother our sons.

Complying meant being away from sons

in order to support partner .. 5 years later

I complied with psychiatry that I was mentally

ill, instead of abused , surrogated , lied to

and cheated on.

5 years later , I as well as our sons where abandoned

for his happiness .

In a MIA survey of former patients in mental hospitals, nearly 500 respondents told of an experience that was traumatic and involved force and abuse.
— Read on www.madinamerica.com/2018/12/mia-survey-force-trauma-sexual-abuse-mental-hospitals/