Tag: distorted energy

Over it, long ago; the legacy of NPD , the Never Ending Pain

You can do all the research in the world to understand the inner workings of the narcissist’s mind, but it will do nothing to influence the outcome of the relationship.⁠
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Narcissists don’t think like most people. You can try to appeal to their seemingly ‘hurt’ inner child, be the most devoted partner or family member, and do everything they ask of you, but it will not change a thing.⁠
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Ever.⁠
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Narcissists are not interested in stable, loving, reciprocal connections. The idea of meeting your emotional needs repulses them to the core. The only positive leanings they have about your love and devotion are that they can use your sentimental feelings against you for their own benefit.⁠
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Here’s one thing I know to be absolutely true – when it comes to narcissists, we all want to believe we’ll be the exception to the rule, but none of us ever are.⁠
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There simply is not a way to “make things work” with a narcissist that doesn’t involve erasing your own identity, emotions, and needs.⁠
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You cannot set boundaries with them (none that they’ll honor, anyway)⁠
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You can’t reason with them.⁠
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You can’t get them to stop lying, cheating, betraying, etc.⁠
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You cannot have a loving, reciprocal, healthy relationship if you’re the only one interested in having it.⁠
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And this is the last thing on the narcissist’s mind, even if they try to convince you otherwise. Pay attention to patterns, because patterns never lie.⁠

Don’t forget to claim your free healing roadmap. It’s been downloaded tens of thousands of times and has helped people across the globe to begin their recovery in gentle and encouraging ways:

https://bit.ly/BeginnersRoadmap

⁠

selfhealers #toxicrelationshipcheck #doesntworklikethat ⁠

( #📷 @kim.saeed )

Watch “What would make a narcissist increase their aggressiveness?” on YouTube

Varied ways

Court / Legal

Annulment of Marriage

Embezzled income

Character Assignation

Delight In Living Death of Targeted parent / kid

Tagging ex partner with every negative , taking no responsibility for anything .

Never ever giving up in upholding the distortion , manipulation, continued intimate partner violence.

Ignoring the emotional and physical health of ex and children .

Ignoring the legacy of abuse.

Watch “Do Narcissists Know They Hurt You? [MUST WATCH!]” on YouTube

Do they care ?

Yes if it’s in their best interest to

care .

Far too many examples of huge lack of compassion , empathy .

Bet its my fault 😀, like everything else

Choosing the Scapegoat Child /Child Abuse

These days decry , demand getting off the fence , of owing your truth after factual discernment of all influences in your life .

It’s shocking, Traumatic and extremely lonely and fraught with fear and anxiety .

I did it my way , rightly or wrongly on my own .

I realize I was an emotional parent in the lives of two parents who loved each other passionately and weathered much , including infidelity and reunion. What they lacked in child rearing was highly influenced by Distortions in their own lives ,including Dad leaving home due to his Dad not buying his school books . He lived with an Aunt & Uncle as I’ve learned. Dad held many of his traumas deeply and I was proud to hold him in his shadow , his griefs, his long held feelings that he wasn’t enough ..he never made it . I knew his anger as pain , deep emotional pain and I had lessons , many only once , where he blew up , and I simply pointed out the results, or impact on me and found it unacceptable .

Mom was not an emotional communicater especially matters of the heart UNTIL my marriage, birthing our 1st year with a week to spare .. Past says ” had to marry ” excuse me ?!

Already highly sensitive , Mom’s “Twilight Sleep” RX for childbirth, added to her trauma as soon as she discovered she was pregnant in degrees she dismissed or lived with. Twilight Sleep prohibits bonding as the Mom has an outer body experience and “forgets ” her birthing experience . Handed her babu, she has no idea of who babu is …scary huh?

So I truly get it , and her and it’s been very difficult to heal past wounds of mother but forgiveness began with our 1st born son. Forgiveness came when I accepted she was too bound and scared to face her shadows of which I am aware of to a degree and as I became aware of facts , they meshed with memory and affirmed intuitively.

I trust my self after years of delving into memory , written, spoken, pictures , 1st person stories and emotions that I translate with what I see , hear and experience .

I am trusted in my intuition, and I council and am counciled with out much disturbed energy , my home is my haven , my solace, my peace …

The end of shaky ground in my home life , all the resistance is clarifying in reality .

I am at peace and in forward motion as I navigate very trying times , that have tested me hugely on many levels but I held the light , I rest , I eat as much and as well as possible .

I took charge , and dared to parent myself. Dad was the mother in a bonding that challenged Mom , because she had no soul or spiritual connection due to Twilight Sleep to me and my Pisces nature , her Sagittarius fire , it felt like a competition, and that leeched into the multifaceted scarcity of unity in our family..It was divisive and certainly not something I wanted for children I brought to earth .

I forgave myself for being in a place that accepted masked folks , trying my best to flow with many issues that insulted my soul and were compounded with a son , for who I wanted parents, siblings and enough of all good things , most of all love .

His trauma has been abused and supported in hatred and fear as rage seeps , accusations repeat and retreating and silence is granted him and I enshrouded in death , muted , forgotten , past

This legacy is not healthy, wealthy or wise and that’s why all that should be considered is revealed and the options of healing intensified or ignored are a matter of free will and destiny .

I’m surrendered , Thy Will Being Done .

Blessings & Peace

Dona Luna

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/tech-support/202104/how-toxic-families-choose-child-scapegoat

Enhanced by Psychiatric RX : use of which was totally supported by ex

If you’ve found yourself in a narcissistically abusive relationship, your discernment is likely skewed owing to long-term gaslighting and the narcissist’s use of cognitive empathy.⁠
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But, there’s still a part of you that understands how toxic your relationship is. ⁠
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With normal relationship conflicts, the couple comes back together as a team while feeling emotionally safe.⁠
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With narcissistic relationships, you find yourself begging for their forgiveness even when you’ve done nothing wrong. The thought of not having their approval makes you feel unwell, both mentally and physically.⁠
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In toxic relationships, there’s an unspoken awareness that the narcissist is somehow superior to you, even if you have far more accomplishments than they do. You can’t explain it, it’s like a psychic agreement between the two of you.⁠
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You might fool yourself into believing you’ve stood up to them by arguing, storming out, or making it clear they’ve crossed a boundary…but in the end, you realize how useless all of that is as you find yourself remaining in the relationship – much to the narcissist’s delight.⁠
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All of these things are telling in and of themselves, but one of the chief indicators that you’re being narcissistically abused is that you’ve found yourself in a psychological prison. Although you are an adult with the means to break away, you are met with psychological bars that hold you inside.⁠
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This psychological prison is learned helplessness. It occurs when a person unremittingly faces a negative, uncontrollable situation and stops trying to change their circumstances, even when they could do so.⁠
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Learned helplessness is difficult to overcome, but it’s possible. ⁠
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If you’d like to learn how to begin defeating learned helplessness, Google ‘Kim Saeed Learned Helplessness’, and don’t forget to grab your free Beginner’s Healing Journey Roadmap.

❤❤❤ https://bit.ly/BeginnersRoadmap

And I did disconnect from this energy which has not pleased those distorted and ever in past lacking any humanity, compassion, forgiveness , which I cannot ignore any longer .

Many I held as ” family ” , children ..year after year , upholding the trauma and shadow secrets , unhealed and targeting me still , avoiding the horrible truths that do allow light and love and healing

DM and Feminine can hold distorted Feminine Energy begging to heal and balance

Guidance, expressed the speed within the transformation

of Divine Masculine has been so well supported in his

efforts to rise that the process has accelerated !

With R. Kelly , media , a whole other can of worms

was opened and it took me back to the music men types

of time, who gave the ladies favors of ” 🐝” Yellow Jackets

as reward..Pot was a given, cocaine was a thing .

Partner friends in the 80’s rented lemo’s , rented lover’s

apartments , and ” former ” wanted to swing..in our

home with our sons , upstairs in their space. Party and drinking

was all that was life for him..

I realize many influences that split a personality , trauma does

that. I considered him very wounded , and have no idea what true

love looks like to him.. listening to the abusive nature of RKelly

and the trauma still in his victims , hearing charges will be filed

for sex with a 14 year, knowing with each survivor is now lifted

supported , and is way much lighter …

Past lives says I was masculine in a life cycle, I was a black bag

Country Dr ..Past life says I have killed defending my family,

myself. Past life says a man has given birth; has mothered .

And trauma can split, fracture you into pieces , you forget exist .

Trauma, can nudge you, to wake, as can repeated negative , unhappy

relationships , fear of ” collapsing ” within , of never retrieving your

self even if in a place of misery , it’s often a choice made ..the unknown

is very scary , as is change, surrender , loosing control.

There is guidance , that will allow for a safer healing , and supported

as has born out is united , in an effort to establish the Art Of 💕Love.

And it’s working grandly; I could not be more proud of each of us.

It was horrific to witness the digression of former , as he became

more successful, busy and continued the night life/ highlife , and

witnessed couples interactions , the burden of living a lie , kept

me low, drained, unbalanced because I never knew what he’d do

next..His 3rd person self tales utilized a friend’s name , he was

always covered..A gal told my friend , she could have him, and she

did.. Sacred unions were blaze’ , mocked at being family men,

rather be friends with their kids.. Empty , shallow Hal’s , whose

wives mourned a partner , feeling oppressed and depressed to

discover a halted arrested emotional development .

I understand that so much better, regrettably it took so long ,

It is inner work that’s required and with feminine support

and current fallen angels predominating , a massive amount

of masculines are rising , ascending to join in lighting

this planet 🌎up , lifting it so all are risen , and as much darkness

is muted , with the knowledge this does not ever have to cycle

ever again…Never Ever😜

All planets in retrograde have gone direct.

New Year energy and creativity are uber high.

Try visualization of Beloved’s fulfillment of their

hottest dream / desire , for 5 minutes.

Then your own, for 5 minutes as he would wish

for you.

Pick a theme for 2019. Pick a song that will be your

signature song for 2019.

See the big picture, in grand scale ..then break it down

to doable, daily achievements , and reward yourself

Nothing but self love, which is the