Tag: abuse

The ‘don’ts of Woman

Be a lady they said. Your skirt is too short. Your shirt is too low. Your pants are too tight. Don’t show so much skin. Don’t show your thighs. Don’t show your breasts. Don’t show your midriff. Don’t show your cleavage. Don’t show your underwear. Don’t show your shoulders. Cover up. Leave something to the imagination. Dress modestly. Don’t be a temptress. Men can’t control themselves.

Men have needs. You look frumpy. Loosen up. Show some skin. Look sexy. Look hot. Don’t be so provocative. You’re asking for it. Wear black. Wear heels. You’re too dressed up. You’re too dressed down. Don’t wear those sweatpants; you look like you’ve let yourself go.

Be a lady they said. Don’t be too fat. Don’t be too thin. Don’t be too large. Don’t be too small. Eat up. Slim down. Stop eating so much. Don’t eat too fast. Order a salad. Don’t eat carbs. Skip dessert. You need to lose weight. Fit into that dress. Go on a diet. Watch what you eat. Eat celery. Chew gum. Drink lots of water. You have to fit into those jeans. God, you look like a skeleton. Why don’t you just eat? You look emaciated. You look sick. Eat a burger. Men like women with some meat on their bones. Be small. Be light. Be little. Be petite. Be feminine. Be a size zero. Be a double zero. Be nothing. Be less than nothing.

Be a lady they said. Remove your body hair. Shave your legs. Shave your armpits. Shave your bikini line. Wax your face. Wax your arms. Wax your eyebrows. Get rid of your mustache. Bleach this. Bleach that. Lighten your skin. Tan your skin. Eradicate your scars. Cover your stretch marks. Tighten your abs. Plump your lips. Botox your wrinkles. Lift your face. Tuck your tummy. Thin your thighs. Tone your calves. Perk up your boobs. Look natural. Be yourself. Be genuine. Be confident. You’re trying too hard. You look overdone. Men don’t like girls who try too hard.

Be a lady they said. Wear makeup. Prime your face. Conceal your blemishes. Contour your nose. Highlight your cheekbones. Line your lids. Fill in your brows. Lengthen your lashes. Color your lips. Powder, blush, bronze, highlight. Your hair is too short. Your hair is too long. Your ends are split. Highlight your hair. Your roots are showing. Dye your hair. Not blue, that looks unnatural. You’re going grey. You look so old. Look young. Look youthful. Look ageless. Don’t get old. Women don’t get old. Old is ugly. Men don’t like ugly.

Be a lady they said. Save yourself. Be pure. Be virginal. Don’t talk about sex. Don’t flirt. Don’t be a skank. Don’t be a whore. Don’t sleep around. Don’t lose your dignity. Don’t have sex with too many men. Don’t give yourself away. Men don’t like sluts. Don’t be a prude. Don’t be so up tight. Have a little fun. Smile more. Pleasure men. Be experienced. Be sexual. Be innocent. Be dirty. Be virginal. Be sexy. Be the cool girl. Don’t be like the other girls.

Be a lady they said. Don’t talk too loud. Don’t talk too much. Don’t take up space. Don’t sit like that. Don’t stand like that. Don’t be intimidating. Why are you so miserable? Don’t be a bitch. Don’t be so bossy. Don’t be assertive. Don’t overact. Don’t be so emotional. Don’t cry. Don’t yell. Don’t swear. Be passive. Be obedient. Endure the pain. Be pleasing. Don’t complain. Let him down easy. Boost his ego. Make him fall for you. Men want what they can’t have. Don’t give yourself away. Make him work for it. Men love the chase. Fold his clothes. Cook his dinner. Keep him happy. That’s a woman’s job. You’ll make a good wife some day. Take his last name. You hyphenated your name? Crazy feminist. Give him children. You don’t want children? You will some day. You’ll change your mind.

Be a lady they said. Don’t get raped. Protect yourself. Don’t drink too much. Don’t walk alone. Don’t go out too late. Don’t dress like that. Don’t show too much. Don’t get drunk. Don’t leave your drink. Have a buddy. Walk where it is well lit. Stay in the safe neighborhoods. Tell someone where you’re going. Bring pepper spray. Buy a rape whistle. Hold your keys like a weapon. Take a self-defense course. Check your trunk. Lock your doors. Don’t go out alone. Don’t make eye contact. Don’t bat your eyelashes. Don’t look easy. Don’t attract attention. Don’t work late. Don’t crack dirty jokes. Don’t smile at strangers. Don’t go out at night. Don’t trust anyone. Don’t say yes. Don’t say no.

Just “be a lady” they said.

-Camille Rainville

Mental Health Professionals – Craig Childress Psy.D

Oh my goodness, your mental health people are so awful.

I don’t know how you put up with them. Whenever I talk to them, I wind up whacking ’em on their noggins because they make my head explode. Knuckleheads.

It’s their arrogance that triggers me. I have super-sensitive narcissistic pathology detectors obtained as a regulatory object child for a narcissistic mom.

My nervous system was formed as a regulatory object of exquisite sensitivity. I know when the pathology is present. Put me in contact with the pathology and it’s like a spidey-sense.

I trigger on their arrogance. They are sooo stupid, and yet so arrogant. And… they’re child abusers because they are ignorant and lazy and arrogant. I wanna beat them with a stick.

It’s a very distinctive feeling. “Oh, you must be a narcissist because I want to beat you with a stick for some reason.”

I’m going to have to re-regulate the set point on my narcissism detector now that I’m actually in contact with all your mental health people, dampen it down somehow.

I need to readjust my regulatory systems now that I’m embedded in such abundant narcissism from your mental health people. I can’t have it going off all the time – ring-ring-ring – another one.

I know, I know. They’re all over the place.

I’ll work out some sub-routine of “alternative behaviors” that I’ll go into whenever I trigger. When my spidey-sense tingles I’ll go into my patterned pre-programmed response and that’ll keep me from beating them with a stick for being so stupid.

Honest to god, I don’t know how you put up with them. I’m going after their licenses, but it took me a while to get here. You’ve been here this entire time. Why did you let them keep their licenses?

Oh… that’s right, it wasn’t you. It was those who came before. Okay, I remember the previous waves of divorced parents and exactly – exactly – the same pathology… and exactly the same ignorant and incompetent psychology people. The same people who are now destroying your lives.

The previous parents left them for you. First, the ignorant and incompetent mental health people destroyed their lives… and they didn’t do anything about it so now they’re destroying yours… and it just goes on and on and on.

I told you way-back early-on in some videos with Dorcy what the plan was. Two things, 1) we’re going after the licenses of the ignorant and incompetent mental health people, and 2) we’re going to activate the APA.

The reason I told you way back then was in case you could do anything with the information, because I knew it would be a few years before I was in the position to solve things.

You couldn’t do anything with the information. They couldn’t. That’s okay, now I’m here, so I’ll do it.

You, well not actually you but the other you-people before you, didn’t do anything with their power. Parents are looking for someone to rescue them (it’s a deep unconscious thing), not realizing you’ve had the ruby slippers the entire time.

But you’re a trauma victim, a spousal abuse victim, a brutal and savage form of spousal abuse using the child as the weapon. You’re not supposed to fix things. The doctors are supposed to know what’s going on, and the doctors are supposed to fix things.

And you have such awful doctors… and you accept that. Not you exactly, they did. the ones that left these exact same awful doctors for you.

That’s okay. If you’re waiting for me to solve everything… okay. I’m almost there. There’s just a little bit more I think and I will be able to solve everything – then I wanna be a goat, because, holy cow, if I single handedly fix the entire family court system – for everyone on the planet – all by myself… goat.

I’ll be dead. So make me a posthumous goat. A goat in the great beyond.

I’m doing some housekeeping now with the PASG professional organization (?), or perhaps it’s just a vanity club. Let’s find out.

But that’s not my focus. I’m going into the heart of darkness. I’m joining the AFCC. I’m taking the ring to Mordor. Wheee…

Hi, I’m Dr. Childress, glad to meet you. What do I do in the family courts? I’m a second opinion review of forensic custody evaluations for violations to ethical standards for competence regarding delusional thought disorders and attachment pathology, and for failure in their duty to protect obligations… what do you do?

Well howdy.

I’m a problem child. It’s called “protest behavior” and it’s designed to INCREASE attention – except in kids in the family courts. For some unexplained reason, the “protest behavior” of kids in the family courts is NOT designed to GET attention, it’s designed to sever parental attention… unlike every other child on the planet.

That’s not how protest behavior in a child works. It IS, however, how spousal anger works in an adult. Spousal anger is designed to sever bonds. Child protest behavior seeks to acquire bonds.

Hmmm, curious. Why would a child display spousal attachment behavior rather than child attachment behavior? Such a puzzlement.

I used to be a cooperative person. Do you know who taught me about protest behavior? Three year olds. When I went early childhood my focus was on preschoolers, 3 and 4 year olds.

I love the 3-year-olds, they’re psychotic. There’s just enough mind there to be present, but not enough regulation yet to control their presence. They can get wild, and holy cow are they good at protest behavior.

Truthfully, I haven’t found more masterful protest behavior than that from 3-year-olds. Very committed.

Protest behavior is designed to call attention to a problem – ow – stop it. Protest behavior is the “stop it” after the “ow”.

Protest behavior is SUPPOSED to be annoying because it’s supposed to get attention and annoying gets attention. The MORE annoying the protest behavior is, the better… because that’s the purpose of protest behavior, to annoy other people to get attention to an issue.

So. Little dude. What’s your problem? Why are you rolling around on the floor like that screaming that horrible blood-curdling scream? “Well, you see Dr. Childress, Billy has my favorite dinosaur and he won’t give it to me. So I’m angry.” Oh, okay. got it.

Except my little-bud doesn’t say it like that, that’s too human-speak and he barely speaks much human. They still speak a lot of monkey-speak, they speak in the language of behavior.

Once I learned to speak three-year-old monkey-speak, they taught me all about being annoying and protest behavior – boy, they can be annoying when they wanna be. Wow, little dude, that’s excellent. So… what’s your problem?

So when I join the AFCC, I wanna make friends and be part of the club. Do you think they’ll like me? But I suspect I’ll be annoying because, well, there’s a problem that needs fixing. That’s the function of protest behavior, to get the needed attention to the problem… and… protest behavior is SUPPOSED to be annoying to do that.

Did Gandhi annoy the British? See.

You can be annoying without becoming a savage human and drinking beer from their skull. I can’t it seems, but you can. You be kind… and be annoying, and kind. Like Gandhi.

I’d recommend you not leave the ignorant mental health people for the next family and next, like the ignorance was left for you. Pick up after yourself. Get yourself a little forensic psychologist scooper picker-upper and clean up the forensic psychologists on your lawn.

Don’t leave the mess just sitting there or else the next parent might step in the same forensic psychologist pile of problems that you did.

Or you can wait.

I’ll be solving things in a while. You can wait. Hey, I’m joining the AFCC. That’s a Cairn, remember? Don’t you remember what happens next? Oh, oh, oh, that’s right, I forgot. You’re traveling the other direction.

That’s okay. I’ll wait. But soon… well, never mind, you’ll see, and then you’ll go “Oh, I see.”

Craig Childress, Psy.D.

Clinical Psychologist, CA PSY 18857

Delusions – Craig Childress PsyD

To diagnose a delusion… you MUST identify what actual reality is.

A delusion is a fixed and – false – belief. To diagnose a delusional disorder REQUIRES establishing that one reality is true, and one reality is false.

When two realities are too discrepant, both realities cannot be true. One reality is true. One reality is false.

Trump vs Cohen. One of them is telling the truth, and the other one is lying. There is no middle ground of some sort of “misperception” – nope – one is telling the truth and one is lying.

You’re job as the diagnostician of delusional disorders is to identify actual reality from the lies. Can you do it with Trump and Cohen? Which one do you think it telling the truth and which one do you think is lying?

It’s one way or the other, there is no grey in the middle. One reality is true. One reality is a lie.

In the family courts – one reality is correct – the other reality is a lie. Either the child is being authentically abused by the targeted parent, or the child is being psychologically abused by the allied parent.

There is no grey “misperception” – one reality is true – one reality is a lie told to deceive.

If you are going to be a court-involved clinical psychologist, it is your obligation to make the diagnosis of truth and lie – of reality and delusion. That’s your job.

Because that’s required to make a diagnosis of a potential delusional thought disorder, and the pathology of concern is a potential delusional thought disorder.

So should one person decide what’s truth and what’s a lie?

Get a second opinion. Get a third opinion. Get all your second-opinions right at the start – put your combined heads together and decide – which is the truth and which is the lie.

We can make an accurate diagnosis when there’s the motivation to make an accurate diagnosis. They’re not motivated to make an accurate diagnosis.

I wonder why that is?

Craig Childress, Psy.D.

Clinical Psychologist, CA PSY 18857