Anxiety denotes the awakening of spirit .
My anxiety born of abuse was medicated with Xanax .
Xanax allowed me to become an addict very quickly due
to my extreme sensitivity ..
5 per day for 2 weeks created a chemically induced
nervous breakdown.
On that day in April , and in my incarceration in a mental
ward( Hell on earth for 17 days ) , I was shown signs of spirit .
*The nurse who rushed a fellow patient who was going
to choke me , whispering in my ear ” honey you don’t belong
here”!
My eventual Christian room mate who had such peace
that helped me to calm down enough to know I had to
go home , to Mother our sons , for there was nothing to
heal me me there .. I knew the truth of who I was married
to and how vicious he’d be in a divorce , and so I surrendered
to trying to work things out .
I am not discounting my behaviors , The betrayal of many years
was suspected , behaviors were abusive and horrific , when
the mask was fully revealed 3 months in 24 legal years
of marriage to a stranger ..My concern and compassion
my fears and tears and love were not enough , and I understand
that fully now.
Narcissist are Dark Angels , Survivors Of Trauma ; unhealed .
I have been trying to step out of this shadow , and spiritually
have deepened my faith…in myself …in my efforts and so many
who strive to push through Domestic Abuse/ChildAbuse .
Some find my journey inspiring , Some back off as if it’s catching,
Some are triggered and catalyzed to heal their own families.
Some are fearful of actions they are not sorry for , only
sorry to be found out..exposed . Part of why I had the
negative experience , a partner who wasn’t …
Others are overwhelmed with my varied negative experiences
and my ability to continue to move forward …That does get
more difficult in repeated attempts to impede my progress
and guidance tells me , more positive energy awaits , and
I may have to endure abuse to get there .
Thy Will Is Done
©️
Blessings & Peace ,
Doña Luna 🎄🎁
