My friend Erica nails it

By Erica Joy Olsen

Fellow Pisces

Very proud of and for her

My latest addition to my compassion toolbox. I have a new found appreciation for the masculine struggle. We live in a world where a concerted effort was made to replace the wild man with the savage man. Becoming civilized and christianized (I’m not talking about Jesus’ teachings. I’m talking about how it was manipulated to subjugate people), being told to blindly follow orders, to turn the other cheek, being told that in order to receive spiritual enlightenment one had to turn away from sensuality…. The women became evil temptresses…. Some men even castrated themselves.
Over the years boys stopped seeing their fathers working a trade with their hands that would be handed down to them. They saw their fathers distantly, exhausted from having to comply and work to make someone else rich.
As necessary as feminism was and still is, men were asked by women to tame themselves, but by other men to blindly follow orders, turning warriors into soldiers, making them capable of committing atrocities… but some fights are still worth fighting, yet it’s hard to tell which ones, and whatever you choose it can feel like damned if you do, damned if you don’t.
We were all separated from our ancestors, deprived of important initiations. Men’s left(Feminine) sides withered. Women’s right(masculine) sides withered. I mean, regardless of gender we weren’t even allowed to hold a pen in our left hands!
Men were ostracized for expressing feelings, necessary for them to make informed compassionate decisions that could actually protect and serve. Women were robbed of their ability to make decisions for themselves and became mere objects.
This isn’t a man vs woman issue to me anymore. This is an US issue. Because we are all imbalanced and need to reclaim what we lost! But i will say that men still have the upper hand in making these long overdue changes, in standing up against the abuse of patriarchy, and they need help from the feminine to do this.
Whatever issues you have with androgeny, gender fluidity, trans, my take is that it’s the necessary evolutionary response to what has become of us.
I could go on but let me finish by saying that I SEE YOU AND LOVE YOU!!!

Narcissist Discard Their Children

DO NARCISSISTS DISCARD THEIR CHILDREN?

Narcissists discard their children when they’ve been exposed for who they really are. In my experience outward appearances count for everything in the life of a narcissist. Narcissistic parents expect (in fact insist on) absolute loyalty from their children. A child may be well aware of his/her parents’ lying, cheating, and manipulative ways, but he/she is expected to remain “on side,” always. If the children dare to cross to the “other side,” and take a principled stand, they should be prepared for the inevitable outcome; alienation. A child will be treated with the same (or greater) contempt as anyone else outside the family who has dared to cross them. They will be made to suffer the consequences of exposure. After the perceived “injury,” narcissistic parents will set a deliberate course to rally as many “flying monkeys” as possible to their side, adeptly portraying themselves as victims of their children’s ungrateful, self-serving treatment of them. Their attempts to discredit their children to preserve their image will know no bounds. Accept that those who really know you will not be convinced, and those that don’t, simply don’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Supporting one another in our decision to go “no contact” with our parents has not only strengthened our relationship, but has also allowed us to heal together.

  • Joanne Hill, Hon B.A., B.Ed Psychology & Sociology (1984)

Lilith

Lilith embodies our sovereignty to declare our desires and do what must be done in order to live them out. According to Jewish folklore, Lilith was Adam’s first wife. She was created from the same earth as Adam. So when he expected her to be subservient to him, she refused. Lilith explained to Adam that they were equal– made by God. So when Adam insisted again on her submission, Lilith uttered the divine names and flew away. Supposedly,
Adam sent angels after her to force her to return. But she was with the Archangel Samael, and she desired to remain with him.

Ancient Jewish Midrash, or retellings of biblical stories, portray Lilith as a demon. But contemporary, feminist theologians like Judith Plascow have incorporated women’s experience and women’s voices into traditional texts with their own Midrash. Plascow transforms the fearsome, vilified Lilith into a wise, empowered woman. Lilith embodies the emotional and spiritual aspects of our unconscious or unrealized desires, sensuality, and unbridled sexuality. She owns her body and soul completely. For many women, Lilith is an icon of freedom. Lilith is the first woman. She is the woman who refused to be dominated or defined by anyone or anything outside of her.

When your soul selects her card:

Lilith asks, “What would happen if you leave everything behind?” She wonders what prevents you from getting to experience all that you desire. Is it you? Is it an idea of whom you have to be? Is it society’s definition of what it means to be a woman? Lilith asks the questions that sometimes never fully reach the light of consciousness.
Lilith is unclaimed. She is the ruler of her body and soul and she reminds us that we are too. And not only that, we have a sacred obligation to be the body’s fierce protector. If I am entirely equal to everyone else, to every man, and every angel (like Samael), what would I choose for my life? If I see myself as worthy, as the first woman ever created by the divine what more would I ask for? Am I living the life I desire? Am I actually fulfilled sexually in my current relationship? Are there aspects of my sexuality I haven’t been able to face and voice? Lilith refused to settle. She answered all these questions within her, and took action on the truth she uncovered. Lilith demanded that she meet
with what she really desired. And she’s here to demand that we all do the same. “

  • Excerpted from “The Divine Feminine Oracle “ byMeggan Watterson; Illustrated by Lisbeth Cheever-Gessaman

“Lilith”
Mixed Media
2018

Let Go

′′Let go the people who are not prepared to love you. This is the hardest thing you will have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having hard conversations with people who don’t want change.
Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it’s a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.
When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go of the people who aren’t ready to accompany you.

If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don’t do yourself a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is that you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.

That’s what makes it so special when you meet people who reciprocate love. You will know how precious you are.
The more time you spend trying to make yourself loved by someone who is unable to, the more time you waste depriving yourself of the possibility of this connection to someone else.
There are billions of people on this planet and many of them will meet with you at your level of interest and commitment.
The more you stay involved with people who use you as a pillow, a background option or a therapist for emotional healing, the longer you stay away from the community you want.
Maybe if you stop showing up, you won’t be wanted. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end. Maybe if you stop texting your phone will stay dark for weeks. That doesn’t mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing holding it back was the energy that only you gave to keep it. This is not love, it’s attachment. It’s wanting to give a chance to those who don’t deserve it. You deserve so much, there are people who should not be in your life.

The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy, and both are limited. When you give your time and energy, it will define your existence.
When you realize this, you begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, in activities, places or situations that don’t suit you and shouldn’t be around you, your energy is stolen.
You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and for everyone around you is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else. Make your life a safe haven, in which only ′′compatible′′ people are allowed.
You are not responsible for saving anyone. You are not responsible for convincing them to improve. It’s not your work to exist for people and give your life to them! If you feel bad, if you feel compelled, you will be the root of all your problems, fearing that they will not return the favours you have granted. It’s your only obligation to realize that you are the love of your destiny and accept the love you deserve.

Decide that you deserve true friendship, commitment, true and complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Then wait and see how much everything begins to change. Don’t waste time with people who are not worth it. Change will give you the love, the esteem, happiness and the protection you deserve.”
~ Brianna Wiest ~

Stop Rescuing in Love

This is where I’m at.

I’m learning where my caring, loving responsibility for another person ends.

I’m ride or die. Unwavering. Loyal like a MF’er.

But I’m not going down on your sinking ship. I’m not pulling you from your depths. If you want to heal, you will and I’m here for it. But YOU have to do your own work. I can’t do it for you.

I will hold space and witness, my light a beacon to show you the way out of the storm and darkness. It’s up to you and your free will what direction you move in, or not. Stay if you must. I’m not coming in after you though.