Tag: Children

Wounded Angel Child

The wounded child inside many males is a boy who, when he first spoke his truths, was silenced by paternal sadism, by a patriarchal world that did not want him to claim his true feelings. The wounded child inside many females is a girl who was taught from early childhood that she must become something other than herself, deny her true feelings, in order to attract and please others. When men and women punish each other for truth telling, we reinforce the notion that lies are better. To be loving we willingly hear the other’s truth, and most important, we affirm the value of truth telling. Lies may make people feel better, but they do not help them to know love. ~bell hooks

(Book: All About Love: New Visions https://amzn.to/4fRAXtX [ad])

(Art: ‘The Wounded Angel’, 1903 by Hugo Simberg)

The Bottomless Pit of learned ingratitude- Charlie McCready

Alienated parents often experience a painful dynamic where their children feel they have to “payback” for perceived shortcomings. This belief is instilled by the alienating parent, who paints (projects) a picture of the targeted parent as neglectful or selfish. The child, who has been led to believe these narratives, may come to expect constant compensation for the perceived wrongs.⁠

In reality, the alienated parent has been prevented from giving their love and support. Their attempts to provide for and connect with their child have been limited or entirely blocked. Despite their genuine efforts and desire to be involved, the child has been conditioned to see these efforts as inadequate.⁠

The alienated child often becomes complicit in this dynamic, unknowingly perpetuating the cycle of blame. They carry the belief that they have been short-changed by the targeted parent, even though the reality is that the alienated parent had so much more time and love to give. This disconnect creates a lasting sense of injustice and unresolved tension.⁠

Understanding this dynamic can help alienated parents find some solace in knowing that the problem is not rooted in their actions but in the manipulative influence of the alienating parent. It isn’t easy to be blamed so mistakenly when we know our children truly have been shortchanged – against our wishes and at the instigation of the alienating parent – and we have to, despite all adversity, triggers, injustice, grief …, maintain our patience, empathy, and continued efforts to rebuild trust and connection with their children.⁠

#charliemccready #9StepProgram #parentalalienationcoach #parentalalienation #parentalalienationawareness

Pathogen – Craig Childress PsyD

Where does the pathogen’s death line come from?

Hatred.

It knows the extent of its damage. It knows it is forever separated from us – from our love. That’s an immensely painful place – to be fundamentally unworthy of love.

At the same time, they remain motivated to be loved – the pathogen-person so desperately wants to be loved – but they’re fundamentally damaged and fundamentally unlovable.

That’s the world of the pathogen – it’s immensely painful with no escape. The only escape is to be loved – and they will never be loved because they’re fundamentally broken-damaged humans.

The suicide destructive urge (Thanatos) emerges from their self-hatred. The more evident and overt homicidal destructive urge comes from their hatred of us – because we have the capacity for love that they don’t have – because we love – and we’ll never love them.

They hate us without us even knowing it. We’re happy. They’re not. They want to destroy us and our happiness and love. That’s the origins of the homicidal side of the death line.

The pathogen is damage – it is a constellated set of damaged information structures in the attachment networks of the brain – damaged by trauma. The pathogen lives in a trauma-chemical bath in the brain of its host organism.

It needs that trauma-chemical bath to survive, if the person’s brain resolves the unresolved trauma within it… the pathogen dissolves – it dies.

It wants to survive – it needs to do what it does so it survives. The damage helped the person survive the trauma… that no longer exists… but the brain doesn’t know that.

The brain thinks the world remains the trauma that formed its trauma-response – the damaged set of information structures in the attachment networks – the love-and-bonding system of the brain.

The brain of the host organism recreates the trauma in the environment because that’s the brain-chemical environment the pathogen lives in. It lives in fear and hatred.

It dies in love. That’s its fundamental problem… the pathogen-host person can never be loved – they are fundamentally unlovable – which is the source of their immense pain… and hatred.

Self-hatred because they know they’re damaged and will never be loved. They hate us because we love… and we don’t love them… ever.

You’ll see that line on the family and friends splitting right now – blue humans are rejecting their red friends and family – the red friends and family are… unlovable.

The pathogen infected red-minds have created exactly – exactly – what the pathogen most fears, and fully understands. If we see who the person is… we won’t love the person… and we don’t.

And they hate us for that.

In lower-level outbreaks, such as in the family courts, the pathogen is motivated toward self-destruction. In open-systems of positive feedback loops, it becomes the Terrorist Mind that kills – us – themselves.

We’re split – that’s what the pathogen does – sides with no middle.

The split is along light and darkness – love and hatred – good and evil… with no middle. Time to choose.

You chose.

We’ll begin our descent when the New Year comes. In December, I’ll tell you about our Shadow for this last Christmas of light as we prepare to descend.

Don’t struggle. It’ll just make it worse. You do realize we’re in trauma world now, right? The pathogen replicates itself – in other brains – our brains – the ones that love still.

It creates the hatreds in us that it lives in. If you’re not a host for the pathogen… it will kill you (see Taliban – see Isis – see Nazis).

There’s something that lives in you that’s not you, but it is you. It makes you think and do things – bad things. Your deeper Self is exposing our Shadow to us so we can cleanse it from us – self-reflective insight.

We’ll be doing the bad things now that will lead to later insight… later… later…

For now… surrender, there is nothing you can do now. You gave a sadistic delusional Dark Tetrad absolute power and complete immunity for everything he does – to you.

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha… that was a stupid thing to do. Ha-ha-ha-ha… now, I get to watch your suffering – your self-destruction.

Perhaps we’ll find love again someday – but not for you. You deserve to suffer for the bad things you did to them.

So… suffer.

Craig Childress, Psy.D.

Clinical Psychologist,

WA 61538481 CA 18857

Child hugging Mom

When an adult child hugs their mom, it’s a hug that’s like traveling through a time portal. Suddenly, Mom sees you as three, sitting on her lap, kissing away boo-boos, and smelling delicious after a bath.

And when she holds you a little tighter and closer, it’s because “you’re going to miss this” held true for her—and she wants to keep the moment of three-year-old you alive just a little longer.

So, when you hug your mother, don’t give her a hug with gentle arms where there’s so much space to breathe between you. Give her strong arms, the kind where the world stops still on its axis.

Let her take a moment to cherish those beautiful memories.

Because she loves you more than anyone.

And you’d want your child to do the same.

✍️: @livingfullaftered (Danielle Sherman-Lazar)

📸: Art by Claudia Tremblay