Finally sitting to read my “woman’s world” magazine and this!!! One in three people are experiencing estrangement,we asked experts how to address this sense of loss and consider reconciliation….
Tag: Parental Alienation
Weaponized love / PA
PA ; disrupting the bond of parent/child
Boundaries – Charlie Mc Cready
Enforcing boundaries can be challenging for the targeted parent. The child may have been told you’re mean, so when you don’t buy that pony or new iPhone, they immediately reinforce those negative beliefs. And, of course, this is ridiculous, and the odds are unfairly stacked against us. Is the alienating parent buying that new pony or iPhone? No? But they’re not the ones getting judged. All eyes are on us. That is how the alienating parent has manipulated the situation.
The temptation to give in and buy the child their sweeties is strong. Make life easy. Avoid conflict. I truly understand this. I also realise that, having been denied time (a little or a lot), we want to make the most of it and have the best time possible. So maybe we do overinduldge, more than we normally would. This is not a normal situation. It’s so important to have boundaries still. If we keep buying them those ‘sweeties’, let’s say we could potentially be ‘feeding a monster’. I’m not saying our children are monsters. But they are in a monstrous situation. And we risk unintentionally empowering the child further in the process of parental alienation. By not setting boundaries, the child may continue to manipulate or exploit the situation, which can perpetuate the alienation dynamic.
Setting boundaries, even in the face of resistance or hostility from the alienating parent or the child, is crucial. It helps establish a sense of stability and consistency for the child, which can benefit their emotional well-being. It also communicates to the child that their behaviour has limits and expectations, even if they have been influenced to believe otherwise. By enforcing boundaries, the targeted parent maintains their own integrity and self-respect. It helps prevent further erosion of their relationship with the child and can allow the child to eventually see through the manipulations and realise the truth.
Boundaries are a means to protect both your well-being and the potential for healing and reconciliation with your child in the long run.
Alienation continues abuse
Christmas 🎄 and Family Estrangement
‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse …’ But for us, alienated parents, that silence isn’t peaceful—it’s unnatural. It’s not supposed to be this way. Our children have been unjustifiably, most cruelly, denied a relationship with us, and the quiet reminds us of their absence. The pain is real and heightened on nights like this. I know from personal experience that Christmas can be an extremely tough time for an alienated parent. The sense of loss is heightened, and you can easily get caught in an emotional loop. You have to deal with not seeing the children and maybe even having your presents rejected or returned. Whilst I cannot make your children come back during the festive season or cure the absence of their presence and laughter, I’m here to help you manage these feelings and find your inner strength. I help many parents, like you, cope far better with the challenges that we face. You can learn to re-frame the way that you experience alienation, changing the way you think, feel and act. I will be working on this with my current clients and anyone else who wants to join my program or coaching. You can shift your perspective and regain a sense of peace, not just for the holidays but moving forward. Reach out for support. If not me, then those close to you who can support you when you need it. Take care, Charlie.
#charliemccready
#parentalalienationcoach
#parentalalienation
#parentalalienationawareness
#healing
#divorce
#FathersMatter
#mothersmatter
Abandoned Parents
Just finished reading this book.
She delves into the chemical reactions in our bodies/brains to the trauma of estrangement . No wonder this is a particularly difficult time of year. I know this estrangement has forever changed me. This book nails our feelings and reactions to our children’s behavior. We are certainly thank God not alone in this battle for resilience. In many ways it has made me a stronger person..but that was up to me not my child. To be so invisible is brutal to say the least.
Craig Childress PsyD / Consulting
I’m settling into my daily tasks, and I had an inquiry regarding my possible involvement in a foreign matter.
I had previously spoken with the parent on a first of the month general public consult – now the parent was re-contacting me saying things were getting worse.
The parent wanted to know if I would consult with the involved mental health professional (of course I will, my scheduling assistant can get them onto my calendar for a consultation – have them email my assistant and me).
The parent also suggested possibly bringing me in as a second-opinion on document review (reports) surrounding the matter.
I wrote a response… as I was writing the response I thought, “other folks might find the information useful” – so here’s the information cut-n-paste (almost) from my email to the foreign parent,
__________________
I am available as a second opinion consultant to any interested mental health professional, or to the court through a document review and second-opinion on the information reported.
To establish a consultant agreement would involve a ‘scope of service’ agreement. Do you want me to consult with a mental health professional – or do you want me to provide a second-opinion on documents?
This is something you should discuss with your attorney – how might my involvement be most useful?
Individual Consultation to MH Professionals
If a mental health professional wishes my consultation on a matter, they can email Maggie to get onto my calendar. No scope of service is needed for individual consultation hours.
What is needed is the motivation of the mental health professional to seek consultation. I already have much informational material available on my Consulting Website as well as three articles on ResarchGate and multiple YouTube seminars on the pathology, it’s diagnosis, and treatment.
ResearchGate: Dark Personalities & Delusions in the Family Courts
Greenham & Childress, (ResearchGate): Darks & Delusions 1: Solving the Gordian Knot in the Family Courts
Greenham & Childress (ResearchGate). Darks & Delusions II: The Research Gap in the Family Courts
Greenham, Childress, Pruter (ResearchGate). Darks & Delusions III: The 12 Associated Clinical Signs in 46 Custody Cases.
YouTube Seminars: Dr. Childress YouTube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCV-OK9_OFd3BgBWgB0ccw4w
AFCC Symposium Theme Part 1 Assessing Child Abuse in the Family Courts
AFCC Symposium Theme Part 2: Assessing Child Abuse in the Family Courts
Bluesky: @drchildress.bsky.social
I also recommend that all involved mental health and legal professionals Follow me on Bluesky social media at: Dr. Craig Childress @drchildress.bsky.social
I am available for consultation to any mental health professional who wishes to consult (no scope of service agreement is needed for this task). If you would like me to review documents and provide a second opinion, we can set up a meeting for a scope of service agreement regarding the task.
Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist
WA 61538481 – CA 18857
The manipulated alienated child – Charlie Mc Cready
It’s painful for the alienated child when they realise they’d put their trust in a parent who didn’t entirely have their best interests in mind, they were mostly thinking of themselves. They were being childish, vengeful and selfish when as a parent they’d have been expected, and trusted to be emotionally mature, mentally balanced, nurturing, and unconditionally loving.
Coming to terms with being manipulated, lied to, and deprived of a relationship with a loving parent can be a challenging process for an alienated child. It often involves recognising and acknowledging what really happened, which can evoke feelings of anger, sadness, and betrayal. Healing and reconciliation requires support from people who understand parental alienation. They can gradually gain insight into the dynamics at play and develop a healthier perspective on the situation. It is essential for the child to separate their own identity and emotions from the alienating parent’s influence, allowing them to reclaim their autonomy and make informed decisions about their relationships. Ultimately, the healing process involves finding ways to rebuild trust, establish boundaries, and create a fulfilling life that includes a sense of love and connection with both parents, regardless of the alienating parent’s actions.
A significant amount of programming of false beliefs and fictions need to be untangled so they can move on with their life as a sovereign, happy, healthy-minded individual who is free to love who they choose, not only who their alienating parent allows them to love.
Alienated children need to be immensely brave and strong to break free, but they can and do. Some cut ties with the alienating parent; some find a way to have both parents in their lives, which was always the best situation for them.
#charliemccready
#parentalalienationcoach
#alienatedparent
#coercivecontrol
#narcissisticabuseawareness
#parentalalienationawareness
#parentalalienation
#childpsychologicalabuse
#mothersmatter
#FathersMatter
#FamilyCourt
#custody
GreatCosmicMothersUnite 