Tag: relationships

Worth the wait ❤️💯

Wait for someone who lets you know from the very beginning, if they have genuine intentions with you.

Wait for someone who genuinely wants to be part of your life , and proves it to you with every single day that passes.

Wait for someone who is giving, and does not keep tabs of the things they do for you, because they expect something from you in the near future.

Wait for someone who texts you throughout the day to check in on you because they care about your well-being.

Wait for someone who wants to authentically learn who you are as a person.

Wait for someone who respects you and your children as well.

Wait for someone who shows you the true definition of effort.

Wait for someone who makeprotecting your heart a number one priority.

Wait for someone who motivates you to do better in life because relationships are more than just falling in love. It’s about inspiring each other to become better versions of yourselves day in and day out.

Wait for someone who is patient with you and are guided by morals and reasoning.

Wait for someone who knows the smallest little details about you …. like the way you like your coffee in the mornings, your favorite smell or what movies make you cry.

Wait for someone who doesn’t make permanent decisions based on their temporary emotions.

Wait for someone who understands it’s not about giving you the world, it’s about making you feel like you’re the only one in it.

Take my advice and wait for someone who touches your heart in ways you never thought were imaginable.

~ Cody Bret

Ending a relationship

Ending a Relationship with a certain individual is not like a regular breakup.

People always ask victims and survivors of abuse the same questions.

“Why can’t you just move on?”

“Why can’t you get over it?”

“Why are you still thinking about this person who treated you so bad?”

And what alot of people don’t understand is……you can’t verbalize why, because you don’t even know where to start.

The fact that you fell in love with someone that never existed and now you have to mourn the loss of them.

The fact that they conditioned you to be someone that you don’t even recognize in the mirror anymore.

The fact that you can’t explain the guilt that you feel for letting go of this person that made you feel like it was your only job on earth to save them.

The fact that you can’t explain the anxiety and loneliness that you feel from not having them there because they were the person that soothed you after they abused you.

The fact that you can’t explain that even though they lied to you and fed you empty promise after empty promise, that you still had a fraction of hope in your head that maybe they can change.

Or maybe it’s the fact that you can’t explain the anger that you have towards them because you can’t let go of knowing that you were manipulated by them since day one.

Ending a relationship with this person is traumatizing to say the least, but you’re very capable of recovering from such an unfortunate chain of events.

You have to accept the reality that this narcissistic person never loved you.

They used you to fuel their admiration, and they needed you to reflect their magnificence because they never truly felt it about themselves.

You also have to realize it’s not that you’re unlovable, but it was the person you were with, that was incapable of loving anyone including themselves.

Take my advice and remember…. if you’re in a relationship that makes you question your own value, you need to reconsider the appraisers in your life.

~ Cody Bret

Mental health issues in Alienator

It’s often the case that the alienating parent may exhibit untreated mental health issues. These issues can range from personality disorders like narcissism or borderline personality disorder to unresolved trauma or attachment issues. However, rather than addressing these issues, the pathogenic parent tends to project their own shortcomings onto the targeted parent. This projection serves as a defence mechanism, allowing the pathogenic parent to avoid taking responsibility for their behaviour and deflecting attention away from their own mental health challenges. Instead, they attribute all wrongdoing to the targeted parent, painting them as the sole source of problems within the family dynamic.

Often, the ‘target’ parent has done what they can to encourage the pathogenic parent to seek help but is met with resistance or denial. As a result, the alienated parent is often seeking help to help them cope with an ex who refuses to admit they need help! They may undergo therapy or counselling to help them navigate the complexities of parental alienation and develop coping strategies to protect their well-being and maintain a healthy relationship with their child despite the obstacles posed by the pathogenic parent.

I look forward to the day when there’s a wider public understanding of what we call ‘parental alienation’ (child psychological abuse) and support, interventions, education, and a focus on encouraging the pathogenic parent to seek professional help.

Meanwhle, every day, these posts go out, hoping to help you feel less alone, hoping to help you understand the pathology, so it lightens your load a little. I know I felt so incredibly isolated (over 20 years ago when I first started on this road) myself. Stay strong. Don’t ever lose hope. My children returned. It took a while, but make sure you live your life and don’t get overcome with grief and anger. Do what you can to let that go, and strive to be happy. Reach out if you want to know more about how I can help more with my program and coaching.

#charliemccready

#parentalalienationcoach

#narcissisticabuseawareness

#familycourts