Children who Reject a Parent

“Sometimes the pain of being rejected by our own adult children and being rendered completely invisible to our grandchildren cuts so deep that we loose sight of the fact that what our estranged/alienated adult children are truly rejecting is parts of themselves and their own children.
That’s the part of all this emotional cut-off / no-contact madness that is the most tragic. We’ve got a whole lot of adult sized humans running around pretending as if their own parents don’t exist, and, a whole many more adult humans trudging through life as if they have been buried alive. Then as a result we’ve got all these young humans being raised by parents who have come to believe the illusion that if they just emotionally cut-off and ignore the existence of their children’s grandparents they will somehow succeed in “parenting” the grandparents out of those children.” ~Anue Nue
โ€œif you show someone the sun in your bones and they reject you you must remember. they hurt themselves this very same way. โ€“ unableโ€ โ€• Nayyirah Waheed, Salt

Grandchildren used as leverage ,cycle continues

“Parents who try to punnish or coerce grandparents by witholding visitation defeat thier own child. Whenever there is a conflict between parents and grandparents, the child in the middle is likely to lose.

Some parents and grandparents get it wrong. It is not the parents’ or grandparents’ right over a child, it is a child’s right (and need) to have the love and access to both sets of grandparents without fear, guilt or conflict of loyalty.

A child must not be put in the position of taking sides. A major conflict between parents and grandparents teaches a child wrong lessons about parent-child relationships of grownups. Such a situation might have future repercussions for the quality of relationship the child might have with his parents or his or her own children in the future.” ~ Vijai Sharma, PhD

Watch “All We Are Saying is Give Peace a Chance (lyrics) – John Lennon” on YouTube

I realized my ” super power ” is my vulnerable state

and how deeply I bond with those “different ” folks

and deeply whom I share my ” super power”

while transversing humanity …

The massive labeling of our children , then races ,

women and children.

As the daughter of a compliant LPN who popped

those magic pills of pharmaceutical death , which

cost her her life after 5 years of agony , followed by

her 1st born daughter’s horrific death . Neither

necessary , and I have learned both Grandmothers died

with Valium addiction , depleting their strength,

physically , emotionally and spiritually .

I had the awareness magnified, of the drain and possible

demise resulting of holding emotions in, of non

communication, of not healing trauma ..of course not

knowing the term trauma , as a child , but certainly

holding my own , and being a problem child .

No one , NO one acknowledged my oral rape in

family but Dad. At a time when their marriage had

taken a huge nose dive , both had affairs , after a time

reuniting , ignoring the devastation showing up

in ” adverse” behaviors.

I was very nervous internally, chewing the inside of

my mouth down to popping out a nerve . In addition

to poor nutrition , lack of instruction in a home

of no structure, I hid in my room for privacy and to

avoid being put to work..or watching behaviors I

found uncomfortable .

No peace , no privacy , no space inside I was in my

room or outside or at a friend’s.

I note that in council as well, the deepest hurt , the

hardest to look at , our fractured families, shadow

and light , that ultimately demands strong boundaries

which comes with self worth as one takes charge

and ” mothers ” oneself as the mother longed for ..

I fill that spot for some , even if for that one talk .

As well as adults , after 4 hours of talking to a very

intelligent, single man, he said he has no one to talk

to that has the info I have ..I gave him my card but

I have not heard from him.

I am aquetely aware that indivually peace with in

and peace within our homes is vital to our planet .

It is as vital to Mother Earth ๐ŸŒŽ โค.

A shift is occurring and I am very happy to be

acknowledged as such , as I conclude business , legal

left undone and in shambles, many unpleasant truths

await , as I take it day by day , every effort to solidify

my foundation and thus leave some legacy and honor

for our family with facts that helped healed me …

Our children seek mentors , wisdoms , acceptance

and our truths are vital in being heard , we have hope

and faith to begin to release old hurts , often stepping

out of the family dynamic that does not resonate

until we gain strength in all ways required.

It was vital to my recovery, and thus to be there for Dad

as well as our sons who still reject me…I understand

but again , my awareness of how vital this is , has

brought me to this point , of surrender to Thy Will

allowing all to flow ..

I am striving for every ounce of strength to set up my

office as 3 months later , much has delayed my ability

to get my things in storage.., As a result I am depleted

and in constant need of rest . However , I am Blessed

indeed to have helpers , angels without wings , from

Landlord to my 2 bestest ๐Ÿ’–, who treat me very well.

Its a very healthy , intelligent exchange full of respect

and love and we ” glow ” hours into working together

we know peace , and union ..

Peace with in , the mutual exchange of love and respect

without one bit of negatives , is a Blessing .

This , along with many more over the years , as long

as I can remember , I have had awareness that I totally

accept , and I accept that some don’t hear me and I don’t

matter , but I cannot allow that energy to defeat me .

I have dental issues , gut issues , that I am determined

to heal, and so I discern better ….Peace within and

without as our children require and deserve is

impartive.

All that should be is returned to you , as I am learning

each and every day .

We return to ourselves, and its not always possible

to hold old energies that have nothing to support you .

Its scary , and holds much power, liberated to be…who

we are , who we are meant to be ..escaping the eternal

box or shroud of families who desire us to hold trauma

in fear of change .

Light attracts light , and shadow test us , in our efforts

to reach for more light, calm and peace .

Blessings & Peace ,

Dona Luna