Tag: abuse narcissistic behavior
Distorted :NPD
2nd Month Tested and ” Holding “
A very harsh lesson , still on going as I enter a 2nd month of no income except social security.
Indeed the wheeling and dealing was deeply embedded in shadow with intentions of divesting me completely, financially and intentions geared to digress me mentally, physically, financially and spiritually .
With holidaze and weather, further delaying forward movement , I can assure you all thats possible is being done .
Posing as a professional, the facts deny anything professional and though this energy is dank , I have 4 decades of experience and 20 plus pulling in pieces of the puzzle that are my present reality..Different entity..Same MO..
Finally at rest , with half a tank of gas , $10 cash and Thankful for food , I wait patiently for resolution.
Partnership that wasn’t…says much about the other who dwells in distorted energy .
Maintaining my balance as much as possible, grateful I’m present instead of medicated into submission as I was in past partnership of marriage so that business arrangements could be made to benefit the other .
Sensing the varied reasons for this current situation, I will not demure but will continue with my every effort to accomplish my goal of a home . Noting how much effort has been made to thwart my progress , the facts are present and I’m not concerned about the outcome for the other . Abusing my safety, my trust , my health and finances assures justice as Thy Will Be Done .
Snow is yet another challenge with more predicted in a few days . I refuse to live in fear or anger . Noting the severity of my situation of which I cannot detail at this time for legal reasons, I am aware of the opprotunity offered and denied , that have boomerangs , and no I cannot worry about the other’s side effects , for knowing , for enjoying my every trial if not support them in hopes I expire and their abuse kept secret .
Betrayal in Distorted energy is still abuse 💔especially when confidences have been shared and vulnerability exploited for greed and power .
Blessings & Peace
Dona Luna
A narcissist will use your wounds against you. And that’s it! They use the insecure or unhealed inner parts of you like bullets in their gun to fire at you.
A narcissist knows this. They’ve been practising this from a very, very early age.
And they know how to hit that person with those things to trigger them and get them to hand their power over.
As soon as you’re triggered, you’re pulled out of your powerful, innate self, your centre, and you regress back into childhood or past life traumas. Meaning those parts of you have now been activated, and they’ve come to the fore and feel powerless to protect you.
When you’re triggered into survival programs, you suffer from adrenaline and cortisol that activate the fight, fight, flee or freeze response. And this is where you have brain fog. You can’t think, you can’t get to solutions. You don’t know what to say.
The reason for that is everything shuts down. You’re back in your amygdala, which is triggering you into survival programs. You don’t have access to the cognitive solution, power, wisdom, or the logic to detach and know what to do. You just don’t have access.
It’s so important to understand what’s literally physiologically chemically going on within you so that you can accept that this is what happens. And when you look back through the times when you get triggered by a narcissist, if you’re honest with yourself, you know that’s what happens.
And you know that in those times, it’s like watching yourself by remote, and you can’t stop yourself reacting in a way that you know is not helping you, but it’s like, you feel powerless. You’re hijacked by it. That’s what’s going on.
For more on this, please take a look at these blogs –
The Answer To Narcissistic Abuse That No-one Is Talking About – Peptide Addiction – https://bit.ly/2Q4pGQ8
How Narcissists Draw You In By Identifying Your Gaps – https://bit.ly/3eb0CiC
Join me in the next free Healing Webinar, where I will explain how to seal your gaps and take your power back. You get to experience two healings that will start the Quantum Way to heal from abuse – https://bit.ly/3dn4w8S. You will be sent a replay link after the event has finished.
Much love xo ❤️
Ostracized/Targeted , same abuse
“Recovering from severe ostracism can be a challenge, because it affects a person on so many different levels. It impairs four basic human needs: belonging, control, self-esteem, and meaningful existence. It dramatically raises anxiety levels and causes depression and despondency. Physical pain often accompanies severe ostracism, since the part of the brain handling pain management is activated. When prolonged, ostracism causes many people to withdraw from social connection and activities that they previously enjoyed. Ostracized people feel isolated and lonely. They often become less active physically and emotionally. Meanwhile, the depth and the gravity of ostracism symptoms are usually not understood. There is a tendency to minimize and invalidate the pain of people experiencing ostracism. Occasionally, some ostracized people will act out in inappropriate ways to try to get those ostracizing them to notice them in any way they can, since even negative attention feels better than no attention. In the most extreme cases ostracism can lead to violence or suicide.”
http://ostracism-awareness.com/recovery/
Watch “Why Narcissist Devalues YOU (Hint: Wants YOU “Dead”) – Binary Narcissism” on YouTube
Profiling : NPD Scan Their targets
Narcissists scan you, study you when they initially meet you (even if you are born to a narcissistic parent) , then they reflect back behaviours that are everything you want to see in them to establish a relationship from the beginning!! … don’t be fooled that this will ever be a genuine relationship (it won’t be) .. narcissists are reading you like a book, scanning you so they take taking full advantage of your empathic/caring/humanitarian/kind personality type.. right from the very start of meeting you… ‘What many people fail to understand is that the narcissist abusive behaviour is intentional, sadistic, they are pathological predator and pre-meditated. When the narcissist begins manipulating and gaslighting your reality, that means they are implementing everything they studied about you initially when the relationship began to begin the covert destruction of your life under the radar of everyone else’s awareness inclusive of you, their unsuspecting victim … psychological, physical, financial, emotional and sexual abuse (lovebombing) will be delivered under the ‘guise of love’!!!
Eventually when a victim becomes aware they are dealing with a narcissist, a pathological predator inside their relationship.. it comes as a shock to learn just how dangerous this person you thought loved you actually is!!! The only way to escape narcissistic abuse is to get away safely from them and go #NoContact with them … #NoContact must be kept as a permanent self protective measure to keep invested in for the long term rest of your life!!
narcissisticabuseawareness
narcissisticmindgames
nocontact #NPD
Psychopathy #Sociopathy 🙏🏻#narcissist
How to Spot a Narcissist
Choosing the Scapegoat Child /Child Abuse
These days decry , demand getting off the fence , of owing your truth after factual discernment of all influences in your life .
It’s shocking, Traumatic and extremely lonely and fraught with fear and anxiety .
I did it my way , rightly or wrongly on my own .
I realize I was an emotional parent in the lives of two parents who loved each other passionately and weathered much , including infidelity and reunion. What they lacked in child rearing was highly influenced by Distortions in their own lives ,including Dad leaving home due to his Dad not buying his school books . He lived with an Aunt & Uncle as I’ve learned. Dad held many of his traumas deeply and I was proud to hold him in his shadow , his griefs, his long held feelings that he wasn’t enough ..he never made it . I knew his anger as pain , deep emotional pain and I had lessons , many only once , where he blew up , and I simply pointed out the results, or impact on me and found it unacceptable .
Mom was not an emotional communicater especially matters of the heart UNTIL my marriage, birthing our 1st year with a week to spare .. Past says ” had to marry ” excuse me ?!
Already highly sensitive , Mom’s “Twilight Sleep” RX for childbirth, added to her trauma as soon as she discovered she was pregnant in degrees she dismissed or lived with. Twilight Sleep prohibits bonding as the Mom has an outer body experience and “forgets ” her birthing experience . Handed her babu, she has no idea of who babu is …scary huh?
So I truly get it , and her and it’s been very difficult to heal past wounds of mother but forgiveness began with our 1st born son. Forgiveness came when I accepted she was too bound and scared to face her shadows of which I am aware of to a degree and as I became aware of facts , they meshed with memory and affirmed intuitively.
I trust my self after years of delving into memory , written, spoken, pictures , 1st person stories and emotions that I translate with what I see , hear and experience .
I am trusted in my intuition, and I council and am counciled with out much disturbed energy , my home is my haven , my solace, my peace …
The end of shaky ground in my home life , all the resistance is clarifying in reality .
I am at peace and in forward motion as I navigate very trying times , that have tested me hugely on many levels but I held the light , I rest , I eat as much and as well as possible .
I took charge , and dared to parent myself. Dad was the mother in a bonding that challenged Mom , because she had no soul or spiritual connection due to Twilight Sleep to me and my Pisces nature , her Sagittarius fire , it felt like a competition, and that leeched into the multifaceted scarcity of unity in our family..It was divisive and certainly not something I wanted for children I brought to earth .
I forgave myself for being in a place that accepted masked folks , trying my best to flow with many issues that insulted my soul and were compounded with a son , for who I wanted parents, siblings and enough of all good things , most of all love .
His trauma has been abused and supported in hatred and fear as rage seeps , accusations repeat and retreating and silence is granted him and I enshrouded in death , muted , forgotten , past
This legacy is not healthy, wealthy or wise and that’s why all that should be considered is revealed and the options of healing intensified or ignored are a matter of free will and destiny .
I’m surrendered , Thy Will Being Done .
Blessings & Peace
Dona Luna
Enhanced by Psychiatric RX : use of which was totally supported by ex
If you’ve found yourself in a narcissistically abusive relationship, your discernment is likely skewed owing to long-term gaslighting and the narcissist’s use of cognitive empathy.
But, there’s still a part of you that understands how toxic your relationship is.
With normal relationship conflicts, the couple comes back together as a team while feeling emotionally safe.
With narcissistic relationships, you find yourself begging for their forgiveness even when you’ve done nothing wrong. The thought of not having their approval makes you feel unwell, both mentally and physically.
In toxic relationships, there’s an unspoken awareness that the narcissist is somehow superior to you, even if you have far more accomplishments than they do. You can’t explain it, it’s like a psychic agreement between the two of you.
You might fool yourself into believing you’ve stood up to them by arguing, storming out, or making it clear they’ve crossed a boundary…but in the end, you realize how useless all of that is as you find yourself remaining in the relationship – much to the narcissist’s delight.
All of these things are telling in and of themselves, but one of the chief indicators that you’re being narcissistically abused is that you’ve found yourself in a psychological prison. Although you are an adult with the means to break away, you are met with psychological bars that hold you inside.
This psychological prison is learned helplessness. It occurs when a person unremittingly faces a negative, uncontrollable situation and stops trying to change their circumstances, even when they could do so.
Learned helplessness is difficult to overcome, but it’s possible.
If you’d like to learn how to begin defeating learned helplessness, Google ‘Kim Saeed Learned Helplessness’, and don’t forget to grab your free Beginner’s Healing Journey Roadmap.
❤❤❤ https://bit.ly/BeginnersRoadmap
And I did disconnect from this energy which has not pleased those distorted and ever in past lacking any humanity, compassion, forgiveness , which I cannot ignore any longer .
Many I held as ” family ” , children ..year after year , upholding the trauma and shadow secrets , unhealed and targeting me still , avoiding the horrible truths that do allow light and love and healing
Never Ever Better or Authentic or Reality Based
Not healthy nor wise in any way shape or form to hold faith of healing change .
Releasing all that distorted life , all contracts created to serve ONE …
Most accounts that teach about narcissistic abuse recovery are straightforward about the impossibility of repairing a relationship with a narcissist.
But, there are other accounts, some led by popular teachers and psychologists, that insist there is hope.
I’m here to spread the news that this is false.
You cannot heal your relationship with a narcissist because in order for that to happen, the narcissist would need to WANT it to happen.
The narcissist would need to develop empathy, which isn’t possible. Narcissists cannot be taught empathy. All they can do is pretend.
No amount of “trauma-informed” therapy will make a lick of difference to a narcissist.
You cannot heal a narcissist’s avoidant attachment style. They will not put in the effort to make that happen. They do not WANT to bond healthily with one person (including their own children).
Narcissists do not want stable relationships with one partner. The very idea of being in a normal relationship with one person bores them to tears and frightens them to their core.
Narcissists thrive on instability, drama, chaos, manipulation, and infidelity. These are the things that are exciting to narcissists. These are the things narcissists NEED.
And before you go thinking that you can offer these things to them, know that they don’t want one player in their game. They want multiple players who are positioned against each other.
They want different people fighting over them.
They enjoy it when people get to their breaking point.
They are pleased when they’re able to hurt people emotionally.
Narcissism is part of the dark triad. It’s a close second to psychopathy. Anyone who would lead you to believe there are “safe” levels of narcissism or that narcissists on the so-called “low end” of the spectrum can have healthy relationships is either disillusioned or straight-up lying.
Most therapists and teachers know full well that you can’t make things work with a narcissist. Other folks are trying to set themselves apart by appealing to the dream that there IS a way to make it work, exploiting your deepest vulnerabilities and exposing you to further trauma.
Holding you in my heart. Xo
Kim
GreatCosmicMothersUnite 