Tag: abuse narcissistic behavior

Narcissistic “ Splitting “

NARCISSISTS ENGAGE IN “SPLITTING”, EVEN WITH THEIR OWN CHILDREN…splitting means the narc sees things as all bad or all good, and other similar extremes.

With two or more children, they make one the “golden child” and the other the scapegoat.

The golden child’s burden is that they must live up to the narcissist’s “mini me” expectations, and is expected to reflect well on the narc. The expectations can be extremely burdensome for the golden child, and this carries out into adulthood. If the golden child fails to make the narc look good, or ever sees the narc for what they are, there’s hell to pay.

The scapegoat is the opposite. While the golden child is favored and can do no wrong, the scapegoat child is constantly blamed and shamed by the narcissist. While the golden child is given so many good things and treated like gold, the scapegoat treated as virtually worthless and a shame on the narcissist.

As a result, children often report very different childhood experiences. The scapegoat child will often report serious abuse and neglect, while the golden child may report that the narc was a nearly perfect parent, and may turn on the scapegoat child and be a flying monkey for the narc, and abuse the scapegoat child for speaking out about the abuse.

Healing begins within : Focus on You 🙌💯

Heal First.. Do your shadow work.. Focus on YOU. Then you will align with your person and your souls purpose. This goes for ALL of us, we all must heal from our traumas and work towards finding our higher self. 💙🙌✨️ 💫

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Men with a mother wound often leave women emotionally wrecked. Their inner conflict—craving love but rejecting it—pulls women in, only to push them away, leaving the women holding the weight of wounds they didn’t create and cannot heal.

These women end up feeling confused, inadequate, and deeply hurt, questioning what they could’ve done differently. But the truth is, they were never meant to “fix” him. His pain isn’t their responsibility, yet they pay the price: abandonment, rejection, and emotional chaos.

When you try to save him, you sacrifice yourself. You pour your love into a bottomless pit, hoping it will be enough. It never is. Because the healing he needs can only come from within—through his willingness to face his wounds, not through your endless efforts to soothe them.

The hardest truth to accept is this: You can love him deeply, but you cannot save him. Loving him at the expense of yourself isn’t love—it’s self-abandonment. And while you’re busy trying to save him, you’re losing the very woman he needs: the whole, healed version of you.

Ask yourself: Is your love for him worth losing yourself? Because the cost of staying isn’t just heartbreak—it’s forgetting your worth in the process. The only way forward is to release the belief that it’s your job to fix him and reclaim your power. Only then can you stop the cycle and heal from the wreckage he left behind.

Healing starts with you choosing yourself. Let him choose to heal—or not—but don’t carry his pain as your own.