Discovery

I’m in a ” discovery ” phase as I unpack the load retrieved from storage ( 80 plus mile , round trip ) that I drove for the 1st time . With an excellent helper with who I flow well with , we entered the unit with no problem but with no real idea where things were except the cloths that A. R. pulled out for me last trip .

So it was a Blessing to find my boots , foods and spices and more supplements that are needed !

I have been challenged this past week with lower back issues and for 36 hours have nursed myself 👍🙏❤️

And it’s much better with lots of heat , sweat and Tiger Balm !

So I pulled out a few items that I was able to pick up from yet another storage and saw a big bulge in my cloth ice cooler . It was A.R. and it was what is pictured below 👇!

Both are needed !

So all my stored stuff is A.R. packed ( heavily ; he’s very strong and has moved me singlehanded!) Several times …

I did not see a disconnect, and sadly it comes yet again at a critical time , which is why it’s ended .

I have declined to mother single Dads kids , younger friends who ask me to help out and I did with a very chill 11 year old even going to lunch at her school. It was very enlightening to set a table with her female class mates . We took pictures and talked but I don’t share those .

An invitation on a holiday , was ignored and I feel it was known that was a boundary .

I don’t allow , knowingly allow children to be used in competitive power games . It’s abuse …

I have not heard from A.R. since 9/12. I sense something is off balance .

I have had to make other arrangements that , I regret for his sake . A beautiful young man , of honor and a inquisitive human being like me .

Like a teacher/student connection for both of us , most of the time . However as time as revealed , he’s more and more needed at the family home where he’s able to do from A to Z !

And that is where I must take alternative measures as I prepare for winter , and strive to have all my things under 1 roof , as I wait for my house .

My 98 4Runner is seeming to always need repair and that’s dicey because parts are scant and often require fabrication .

I purchased brake shoes and it seemed doable for A.R. , then it wasn’t . And yes something has to be fabricated to augment the brake shoes .

LED lights required new lenses that are back ordered and $400

A decision was made to replace the LED with halogen and align then. Mine have needed adjusting and it’s very difficult to see at night .

I have a chip monk nest in my AC which is interesting 🤨.

I’m Thankful for all that he is . I was patient , sometimes extremely patient , but the communication ended .

His journey of spirit is his to direct , his acceptance of adulthood within himself ; I am very proud to have known him and had him in my life for he has been an honorable young man , compassionate and made me feel safe .

There were times when that was ” off ” and I began to understand his responsibilities which left little ” me ” time and pushing the envelope, with his time . Lack of sleep , self medicating …… it’s hard work !

I sense a break through ; praying it’s not a break down .

This young man is so worthy , so awesome and unique and though I miss him ; I am surrendered to the wisdom of Divine 🙏❤️

Blessings & Much Peace ☮️

Dona Luna ❤️

Author: GreatCosmicMothersUnited

I have joined with many parents affected with the surreal , yet accepted issue of child abuse via Pathogenic Parenting / Domestic abuse. As a survivor of Domestic Abuse, denial abounded that 3 sons were not affected. In my desire to be family to those who have found me lacking . As a survivor of psychiatric abuse, therapist who abused also and toxic prescribed medications took me to hell on earth with few moments of heaven. I will share my life, my experiences and my studies and research.. I will talk to small circles and I will council ; as targeted parents , grandparents , aunts , uncles etc. , are denied contact with a child for reasons that serve the abuser ...further abusing the child. I grasp the trauma and I have looked at the lost connection to a higher power.. I grasp when one is accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like discrimination.. Shame and affluence silences a lot of facts , truths that have been labeled "negative". It is about liberation of the soul from projections of a alienator , and abuser ..

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