Tag: targeted

Alienated Child – Charlie McCready

The alienated child unconsciously aligns with the parent who is presenting themselves as being good, loving, protective, ‘the only one’. The child then consciously rejects the apparently ‘bad’ parent. Despite how it might appear, this is agonising, traumatic, confusing, and upsetting to them, and yet all the anger and negativity induced is projected onto the ‘target’ parent. It’s quite easy to manipulate this alienation (denigration, judgement, emotional cut-off and/or actual no contact) when that child only hears only one side of the story, over and over again. It’s a horror story, a fiction they come to believe is real. The triangulation/alienation keeps the truth out of bounds and censored, and the ‘target’ parent becomes the monster in the story, a creation of the alienating parent’s imagination and disordered pathology. , The rejection of a loving parent by the alienating child is a coping mechanism. They ‘split’ – good, bad – and think they hate the ‘bad’ parent, and love the ‘good’ parent. This child is terrified of being abandoned by the parent who has inflicted forced compliance and shared persecutory delusions on their child, telling the child they’re the only parent … it’s trauma bonding, similar to Stockholm syndrome, and it is, of course, emotional and psychological abuse. To re-establish any relationship with the rejected parent, that child basically needs to find the courage (because of induced shame, guilt, fear, confusion, anger … the whole parental alienator’s toxic pathology) to hear the other side of the story. In many cases, it might be a story that the target parent is unable to tell if it causes more pain to that child. Often it is better to close the book on the past. It depends on the child and situation. You have to ‘read’ them to see how much they would benefit from hearing anything from previous chapters. It’s painful for any of us – our alienated children being no exception – to find out we’ve been duped, controlled, manipulated, emotionally abused deprived of the love and nurture of a loving, available parent, and believing them to be something they are not. If and when your alienated child reaches out, keep your words in the present tense, and loving, turning the page on the past, and focussing on creating a better future moving forwards.

#charliemccready

#parentalalienationcoach

#alienatedparent

#traumabonding

#coparentingwithanarcissist

Charlie McCready Kids with 1 parent

An alienated child will often discard presents bought by the ‘target’ parent. They will post photos on social media of their aligned parent but never the alienated parent. It is as if they only have one parent and it is excruciating for the ‘target’ parent to see this. Much as they want to see what’s going on with their child, and they want to see them happy, their non-existence is painful. I know from personal experience. These behaviours can become learned. Even a child who has reunited with a previously rejected parent, will be wary of showing evidence of a good relationship (with both parents). They may still have lingering fears, conditioned responses, or a sense of loyalty towards the alienating parent. These emotions and behaviours can persist even after reconciliation, as the alienation process often creates deep-seated trauma bonds and conflicting emotions within the child. Years later, the child/adult may inherently fear upsetting or angering the alienating parent. They know that showcasing a relationship with the previously rejected parent is going to trigger the alienating parent. They may worry about potential repercussions, such as further manipulation, guilt trips, or even retaliation from the alienating parent. Additionally, the child may feel a sense of obligation or loyalty towards the alienating parent, leading them to prioritise that relationship on social media while keeping the relationship with the previously alienated parent private.

It’s essential to understand that healing from parental alienation is a complex and ongoing process. Even if the child or young adult has reconnected with the previously alienated parent, the psychological impact of the alienation may still be present. I speak from personal experience of this, and picking my battles, in fact, choosing to focus on gratitude for my children being in my life again, after a very long time, I let this one go, I see the previously alienating parent is given a lot of coverage on social media … I let it go (except for sharing this with you).

Overcoming fear, guilt, and loyalty conflicts can take time and a supportive environment. A previously alienated parent should respect the child’s boundaries and emotional needs, allowing them to navigate their healing journey and find their voice in their own time.

#charliemccready

#parentalalienationcoach

#parentalalienation

#parentalalienationisreal

#parentalalienationawareness

#FathersMatter

#mothersmatter

#FamilyCourt

#custody

#childcustody

#divorce

Famly of “womb mates”

The eldest , long dark hair never knew her bio Dad . She was a very young child when uncle began his sex implantation /abuse which continued thru her adult life , regardless of status .

Trauma Bond

It is my belief that each of us were affected by her experience or initiation.

No boundaries as far a partners which has been a theme for siblings .

I did not buy into it and avoided all engagement in entaglents even as a child , to be corrupted by the sexual trauma bonds .

I had many close calls .

I had no memory of my own oral rape and effort to initiate me into this shadow .

For this , knowledge and my truths , I hold in a place of distortion , or witchery in their minds and hearts to blasphemy me for not accepting sex as a weapon or tool or addiction .

It was this that fed , my past experience within the distorted masculine I married and had 3 sons with .

Not only sexually fed , taking of my property , allowing my financial support …a sister stated that she was going to help me IF I did as told….

Dad had seen the same energy as I experienced and it adversely affected Mom and Dad’s marriage .

Mom ignored a lot and allowed infighting, power plays etc

It shows , up in adults .

Nothing was acknowledged by Mom for her brother’s rape of 2 of her daughters .

It seems all 5 children were sexually molested outside of our home and carried on the abuse within and without our home without my knowledge or comprehension until 2005ish

Taking charge of Dads estate after his years of widowed existence , was a power play for brothers who Stockholmed Dad as he mentally declined .

The estate suffered from their devilish deeds , I was given a 1/3 of what I should have received.

I’m quite sure Dad would not have set a will up that had 2 brothers deciding how to carry out his wishes .

Dad had Dementia and after his accident without oxygen , with COPD , he developed Hypoxia, the brain cells died .

He had end stage COPD

He had end stage heart disease .

I did not know, nor was I told any of this .

In caring for him , I had no support and lost in my effort to keep him safe and at peace in his own home to die .

Mom died at home due to a very high profile nursing home neglecting her urgent care needs .

Dad brought her home and she passed within days .

I have not had funds to take this matter before court.

Just as ex has controlled my income , for nefarious , self provoked greed , covering up their misdeeds, family caste me out , after he did totally and demure I am the witch , but they love me !

Eldest passed horribly , never healing trauma or seeking absolution or forgiveness.

She seldom crosses my mind , sadly , her behaviors had many shadow effects on me and I understand and released her long ago . No attempts were made on her part , after I responded to her effort to have me disconnect from Dad and share my inheritance in 2004.

A lot of devil energy exist in siblings , I totally separated from after buried Dad in Jan of 2013.

She passed within months .

Family Fail strengthened my resolve to know and do better .

Remaining sister offers help as with my eviction , then spirals into shadow that has allowed me harm , so after 2020 , I am in no contact.

My failure was in ignoring Intuitive messages and signs , falling for the mask that devil/shadow energy and trauma unhealed that is not my place nor desire to heal for anyone beyond my facts and truths offering .

Blessings & Peace

Dona Luna