Ending Toxic Relationships : Anger /Self-Abandonment

Self-abandonment never leads to a positive outcome.

Not only does it teach people that they matter more than you do, it teaches your subconscious mind and wounded inner child that, as well.

Self-abandonment can look different for each individual, but here are some common examples:

  • Caving after that 11th hoover when you know how things will turn out
  • Modifying your own family dynamics to cater to someone you barely know
  • Believing someone when they say they’ll do better and be better when they’ve already proven to you that they’re a liar
  • Doing that uncomfortable thing in the bedroom and instead of securing the person you did it for, you learn it was all in vain
  • Canceling plans with friends and family for a flaky person who’s already bailed on you numerous times
  • Saying you like something when you don’t
  • Forgiving someone over and over after they’ve already shown you they don’t deserve forgiveness
  • You constantly give more than you receive
  • You repeatedly try to control a person or an outcome and give away all your energy and time in the process
  • You try to raise an adult when you already have minor children in the home
  • You constantly ignore your intuition or internal GPS

Healthy relationships don’t require you or ask you to abandon yourself. If you feel like this is something you need to do, it’s time to re-analyze your relationships and level of self-love.

Always thinking of you. Xo

Self Sabotage is Ego , Herd-Mentality , family oriented Fear-Trauma Driven

This was very hard , as my care-taking self stepped up

as my job required .. I had to accept that I may have been

over zealous in mapping my blue print , or grand design .

I dodged as much as possible being responsible for home

hearth and children due to not having been trained nor

educated , and for making every effort to be in Spirit ,

while Shadow predominated … in my not knowing .

I have always been detailed , observing without judgement

but implanted with critics , mostly feminine especially

in silent rejection … I had to know why… While there are

revelations to come , I did the work necessary to release me

from self sabotage, after listening to those shadow situations

and my reaction to others , aware of their truths , it was easier

to let go of them…

A harsh lesson has evaporated as I refused participation in

a feminine driven force of such judgement , coincided with

my authentic self , finally ready to shine , along with a new

friendship that was blocked by interference so blatant

and vulgar in a sisterhood , I had no choice but to put

resting bitch mask on for thus catalyzing my self review

along with others input , especially the every ready former

along with so many forced relocations , I had no

choice , but to retreat … it’s been a very good thing .

I am expressing myself openly .. I am acknowledging

my 14 month younger brother has subconsciously

submitted to his partners abuse of over 40 years

as he admits stage 5 kidney failure .. His rage , fear

anger locked away in his kidneys, ever silenced by

feeling not enough , serving a love that abused him ,working

in an industry that’s highly toxic ..

Being the light as much as possible in the worlds , holding

the toxic , disregarding overtures to help , having no

time for God ..

He deserves to leave , here lighter.. his rage towards me

does not allow contact .

Knowing self , knowing dark from light , driven towards

the light was treated like black magic , control , then

mental illness .

I am aware of who I am.. that’s all I need know .

I am aware of a few of my missions .. I will be my brothers

voice .. in unity and love ❤️, that binds us beyond his rage .