Self Sabotage is Ego , Herd-Mentality , family oriented Fear-Trauma Driven

This was very hard , as my care-taking self stepped up

as my job required .. I had to accept that I may have been

over zealous in mapping my blue print , or grand design .

I dodged as much as possible being responsible for home

hearth and children due to not having been trained nor

educated , and for making every effort to be in Spirit ,

while Shadow predominated … in my not knowing .

I have always been detailed , observing without judgement

but implanted with critics , mostly feminine especially

in silent rejection … I had to know why… While there are

revelations to come , I did the work necessary to release me

from self sabotage, after listening to those shadow situations

and my reaction to others , aware of their truths , it was easier

to let go of them…

A harsh lesson has evaporated as I refused participation in

a feminine driven force of such judgement , coincided with

my authentic self , finally ready to shine , along with a new

friendship that was blocked by interference so blatant

and vulgar in a sisterhood , I had no choice but to put

resting bitch mask on for thus catalyzing my self review

along with others input , especially the every ready former

along with so many forced relocations , I had no

choice , but to retreat … it’s been a very good thing .

I am expressing myself openly .. I am acknowledging

my 14 month younger brother has subconsciously

submitted to his partners abuse of over 40 years

as he admits stage 5 kidney failure .. His rage , fear

anger locked away in his kidneys, ever silenced by

feeling not enough , serving a love that abused him ,working

in an industry that’s highly toxic ..

Being the light as much as possible in the worlds , holding

the toxic , disregarding overtures to help , having no

time for God ..

He deserves to leave , here lighter.. his rage towards me

does not allow contact .

Knowing self , knowing dark from light , driven towards

the light was treated like black magic , control , then

mental illness .

I am aware of who I am.. that’s all I need know .

I am aware of a few of my missions .. I will be my brothers

voice .. in unity and love ❤️, that binds us beyond his rage .

Author: GreatCosmicMothersUnited

I have joined with many parents affected with the surreal , yet accepted issue of child abuse via Pathogenic Parenting / Domestic abuse. As a survivor of Domestic Abuse, denial abounded that 3 sons were not affected. In my desire to be family to those who have found me lacking . As a survivor of psychiatric abuse, therapist who abused also and toxic prescribed medications took me to hell on earth with few moments of heaven. I will share my life, my experiences and my studies and research.. I will talk to small circles and I will council ; as targeted parents , grandparents , aunts , uncles etc. , are denied contact with a child for reasons that serve the abuser ...further abusing the child. I grasp the trauma and I have looked at the lost connection to a higher power.. I grasp when one is accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like discrimination.. Shame and affluence silences a lot of facts , truths that have been labeled "negative". It is about liberation of the soul from projections of a alienator , and abuser ..

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