Detachment can be exhausting

Detachment is your ally. Detachment lets you shift from wanting to undo a wrong to just focusing on healing yourself. When your weaponised, indoctrinated, alienated child is rude, insulting, upsetting, angry, accusatory – and even if you wanted, you can’t defend yourself from something you didn’t do because you’re not given the airtime – it is not easy to deal with this. But not reacting, not fighting fire with fire, is a loving act. ⁠

Detachment allows us to disengage emotionally from the turmoil of the situation, providing a much-needed respite from the relentless onslaught of hurtful behaviours and manipulative tactics. Cultivating resilience and inner strength in these adversarial circumstances is paramount. ⁠

By accepting the reality of our situation, we create space for healing and transformation to unfold. As Kabat-Zinn eloquently puts it, “You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.” In other words, by relinquishing our attachment to outcomes and relinquishing the need to control, we empower ourselves to ride the waves. ⁠

The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu once observed, “Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” In this journey of parental alienation, may we find the strength to love ourselves deeply and the courage to extend that love to our alienated children, even in the face of the most difficult adversity.⁠

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Author: GreatCosmicMothersUnited

I have joined with many parents affected with the surreal , yet accepted issue of child abuse via Pathogenic Parenting / Domestic abuse. As a survivor of Domestic Abuse, denial abounded that 3 sons were not affected. In my desire to be family to those who have found me lacking . As a survivor of psychiatric abuse, therapist who abused also and toxic prescribed medications took me to hell on earth with few moments of heaven. I will share my life, my experiences and my studies and research.. I will talk to small circles and I will council ; as targeted parents , grandparents , aunts , uncles etc. , are denied contact with a child for reasons that serve the abuser ...further abusing the child. I grasp the trauma and I have looked at the lost connection to a higher power.. I grasp when one is accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like discrimination.. Shame and affluence silences a lot of facts , truths that have been labeled "negative". It is about liberation of the soul from projections of a alienator , and abuser ..

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