Entitled- Alienated children feel the targeted parent owes them

If and when we see a child who has been alienated, it can feel as if they’re doing us a favour. Or doing their duty. Or they think there should be something in it for them – a treat, a nice meal, an apology, hard cash … This sense of entitlement stems, of course, from the alienating parent. They feel we owe them too. We abandoned them, or we betrayed them, or we didn’t do right by them, or it’s all our fault. Whatever the scenario, it basically boils down to the same thing: the alienating parent, and therefore the indoctrinated child too, feels that we owe them. We should pay/be punished. We should pay – emotionally, and financially. That’s why it’s quite easy, given our situation to play along with this too and be so grateful to be given an audience, we do roll out the metaphorical red carpet. We don’t behave as we would normally because the time we have (if any) is so precious. It’s like the most unimaginably wonderful gift – better than anything that can be wrapped up at Christmastime with a pretty bow on top – to spend time with our alienated child. Alienation has turned everything upside down and inside out. It’s given the child the upper hand because we LOVE them so much. Because it is exactly our love for them that’s being played here. Teenagers might do this anyway, trying to get what they can from parents, but the alienated child has learned all the manipulative ways of the alienating parent. What it is hard, but nevertheless, worthwhile trying to do is not roll out that red carpet but just behave as we would as if the alienation had never happened. Plus this situation might have left us short-changed (emotionally and financially), rather than them. The alienated child doesn’t need a red carpet, they just need love.

#charliemccready #9StepProgram #parentalalienation #parentalalienationawareness #coparentingwithanarcissist #coparenting #divorce #highconflictdivorce #narcissisticchildabuse #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissisticabuserecovery #narcissism #narcissist #childabuse

Author: GreatCosmicMothersUnited

I have joined with many parents affected with the surreal , yet accepted issue of child abuse via Pathogenic Parenting / Domestic abuse. As a survivor of Domestic Abuse, denial abounded that 3 sons were not affected. In my desire to be family to those who have found me lacking . As a survivor of psychiatric abuse, therapist who abused also and toxic prescribed medications took me to hell on earth with few moments of heaven. I will share my life, my experiences and my studies and research.. I will talk to small circles and I will council ; as targeted parents , grandparents , aunts , uncles etc. , are denied contact with a child for reasons that serve the abuser ...further abusing the child. I grasp the trauma and I have looked at the lost connection to a higher power.. I grasp when one is accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like discrimination.. Shame and affluence silences a lot of facts , truths that have been labeled "negative". It is about liberation of the soul from projections of a alienator , and abuser .. View all posts by GreatCosmicMothersUnited