The pathology in the family courts is fundamentally a spousal abuse pathology using the child as the weapon.
The absence of empathy is the capacity for human cruelty.
The narcissistic value of spousal abuse is that it’s okay to be cruel to someone if they “deserve” it – then the narcissistic-abusive personality decides who “deserves” their cruelty.
Abusive Spouse: “Yeah, of course I hit her, my dinner was cold. She deserved it.”
Abusive Spouse: “Yeah, of course I slapped her around. She was mouthing off and talking back. She deserved it.”
The narcissistic value is that their victim “deserves” their cruelty. No one deserves cruelty.
That someone “deserves” cruelty is the distorted value system of IPV spousal abuse (Intimate Partner Violence) created by the absence of empathy.
The true value system is that we are not nice to other people because of who they are, we are nice to them because of who we are.
No one deserves cruelty. Everyone merits compassion and kindness… because that’s who we are. Compassion and kindness are good things.
Cruelty is not. The absence of empathy is a symptom of only three pathologies – narcissistic personality – antisocial personality (psychopathic) – autism. Rule out autism as the cause and there are only two options left to explain the symptom of cruelty.
The absence of empathy from the involved forensic psychologists for the grief and suffering of the targeted parent is a professional abomination. To lose your child is to lose everything. The grief and suffering is immense.
Being mom and dad is self-identity itself. To have that ripped away, to have love ripped away, will cause immense grief at loss. Where is the empathy from the forensic mental health people for the immense grief and suffering of the parent?
There are two dangerous pathologies in the family courts that require a proper risk assessment, 1) possible Child Psychological Abuse by an allied parent creating a shared persecutory delusion with the child, and 2) possible Spouse or Partner Abuse, Psychological (DSM-5 V995.82) of the targeted parent by the allied parent using the child as the weapon.
ACS-11, that the targeted parent “deserves” to be rejected, is the spousal abuse ACS. In recent research from Greenham, Childress, & Pruter (2023), ACS-11 Deserves to be Rejected was evident in all 46 families in high-conflict custody litigation – a 100% prevalence rate.
At it’s core, this is a spousal abuse pathology using the child as the weapon – DSM-5 V995.82 Spouse or Partner Abuse, Psychological.
In weaponizing the child into the spousal conflict, the pathological narcissistic-borderline-dark personality parent creates such significant pathology in the child, that a child abuse diagnosis becomes warranted – DSM-5 V995.51 Child Psychological Abuse.
Diagnosis guides treatment. The treatment for cancer is different than the treatment for diabetes. In all cases of court-involved child custody conflict surrounding attachment pathology displayed by the child, a proper risk assessment on two counts needs to be conducted to the appropriate differential diagnosis for each parent.
Is there child abuse? Is there spousal emotional and psychological abuse using the child as the weapon? In all cases of possible dangerous pathology – suicide, homicide, abuse (child, spousal, elder) – a proper risk assessment needs to be conducted.
Craig Childress, Psy.D.
Clinical Psychologist, CA PSY 18857
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