Love is Love – Charlie McCready

Grief and loss are heavy, and we feel like we’re only half-alive, barely observing a world carrying on without us, as we’re without the ones we love. It’s an abyss, and incredibly hard to see anything good. The trouble with this is that it’s self-fulfilling and keeps us stuck. It’s more a prison than an abyss. There is an escape route, in fact, the door is open, we can leave whenever we choose. Sometimes we don’t want to leave, we want to stay in our grief. It feels like we’re keeping the love close, to feel the pain of the love that was close. But we can connect in a much better way. We can connect with good feelings. With alienation, the intention is to hurt us. Often (not always), these are hurt people hurting others. We deserve better than that. We are not victims, we have just been caught up in the pathology, as have our children. But we do ourselves a disservice to be stuck in the pathology (which was its intention) and our children too. To see us beaten and hurt doesn’t help them. In fact, it might make them feel worse – guilt, shame, anxiety. All these are negative feelings and no good for any of us. Breathe. Be calm. Focus on what is good in your life. Focus on happy memories if you must look back, but try to be present. There is still love. In small kindnesses from others, and from the kindness you give others. In so many ways. Life is a gift. You are in charge of how you feel. So, try to feel good today, and the next day, and the next. If you have angry thoughts about a situation or person, refocus your mind. Listen to some music that lifts your mood, watch a comedy sketch, call a friend, walk in nature … lift your mood. If you don’t feel that great about the future, make yourself a coffee and take a moment just enjoying that, clearing your mind. It’s a discipline, but it’s also self-love. Love is love. Choose love. Choose loving thoughts as much as possible. Then you open the door to a better frame of mind, a better day, a better life. One day at a time.

#charliemccready

#parentalalienationcoach

#healing

#overcomingadversity

Unknown's avatar

Author: GreatCosmicMothersUnited

I have joined with many parents affected with the surreal , yet accepted issue of child abuse via Pathogenic Parenting / Domestic abuse. As a survivor of Domestic Abuse, denial abounded that 3 sons were not affected. In my desire to be family to those who have found me lacking . As a survivor of psychiatric abuse, therapist who abused also and toxic prescribed medications took me to hell on earth with few moments of heaven. I will share my life, my experiences and my studies and research.. I will talk to small circles and I will council ; as targeted parents , grandparents , aunts , uncles etc. , are denied contact with a child for reasons that serve the abuser ...further abusing the child. I grasp the trauma and I have looked at the lost connection to a higher power.. I grasp when one is accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like discrimination.. Shame and affluence silences a lot of facts , truths that have been labeled "negative". It is about liberation of the soul from projections of a alienator , and abuser ..

Leave a comment