Ending a Relationship with a certain individual is not like a regular breakup.
People always ask victims and survivors of abuse the same questions.
“Why can’t you just move on?”
“Why can’t you get over it?”
“Why are you still thinking about this person who treated you so bad?”
And what alot of people don’t understand is……you can’t verbalize why, because you don’t even know where to start.
The fact that you fell in love with someone that never existed and now you have to mourn the loss of them.
The fact that they conditioned you to be someone that you don’t even recognize in the mirror anymore.
The fact that you can’t explain the guilt that you feel for letting go of this person that made you feel like it was your only job on earth to save them.
The fact that you can’t explain the anxiety and loneliness that you feel from not having them there because they were the person that soothed you after they abused you.
The fact that you can’t explain that even though they lied to you and fed you empty promise after empty promise, that you still had a fraction of hope in your head that maybe they can change.
Or maybe it’s the fact that you can’t explain the anger that you have towards them because you can’t let go of knowing that you were manipulated by them since day one.
Ending a relationship with this person is traumatizing to say the least, but you’re very capable of recovering from such an unfortunate chain of events.
You have to accept the reality that this narcissistic person never loved you.
They used you to fuel their admiration, and they needed you to reflect their magnificence because they never truly felt it about themselves.
You also have to realize it’s not that you’re unlovable, but it was the person you were with, that was incapable of loving anyone including themselves.
Take my advice and remember…. if you’re in a relationship that makes you question your own value, you need to reconsider the appraisers in your life.
~ Cody Bret
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