Self-worth and self-love are integral to our happiness. If we don’t get a sense of our own value when we’re children, during school years, or with our spouse/partners, we can potentially open ourselves up to experiences in our lives that reflect our low self-esteem/lack of self-love back at us, reinforcing the proverbial vicious cycle.
“You don’t attract what you want, you attract what you are.” Wayne Dyer
“Emancipate yourself from mental slavery, none but ourselves can free our minds” Bob Marley
I speak from experience. I have been through many dark nights of the soul over the years. Many. And always it comes back to the need for more self-love and worth. It starts with that.
You’ve heard it before, I’m sure, but we must love ourselves first and be our own best friends. We must love and care for ourselves as we love and care for others. Those people and experiences we’ve attracted into our lives, like those parental alienators, take advantage of kindness and generosity, love and compassion. Healthy relationships come from mental and emotional maturity and balance. Boundaries. Self-respect. Love is not conditional – attachment, promises, control, manipulation. We don’t need validation from others. We are enough We can let go of fear, anger, grief … I know, it’s hard, but it can be done. With time, kindness, and some conscious effort of course. We can start afresh every day. A clean slate. We are not victims. We can transform pain into power. The past is over. Our memories can’t hold us back forever.
“There is no coming to consciousness without pain. People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.” Carl Jung
Nobody else has the permission to tell us we are less, not good enough, unlovable … that stems from their own issues and fears. We should know better if only our minds would just give us a break and be our friend, not our prison guard. Today offers the gift of the present. We can be the saviour, the hero and the creator of our lives.
#parentalalienation #parentalalienationawareness #divorce #highconflictdivorce #childabuse #narcissisticchildabuse #narcissisticabuseawareness #narcissism #narcissist #narcissisticabusesurvivor #narcissisticabuserecovery #charliemccready #personalauthority #9StepProgram
I did allow his opinion, as well as his Moms to matter, and later I did care very much of our children’s opinions.
I did go through times when I devalued myself that I dishonored myself , but I was never suicidal . I was grieving that I had no one around me who authentically loved me , in my own home and cared enough to delve into my misdiagnosis, my physical illness(s) , in general my well being .
Or our kids …neglect was my reality and I know our children felt the same about themselves .
Many universal and man’s laws were abused , broken , mangled and it seems that was supported by the brotherhood of men in power .