Family who view you as having no meaning in their life

Your toxic family members do not view you has holding ‘meaning’ in their life. They view you as someone who is or isn’t “useful” to their life. Love isn’t a consideration because love is not something severely character disordered people feel.

To only be valued for your usefulness sets you up to ‘earn’ love that should not have to be earned. Yet, ironically, your family members will not feel as if they have to earn your love. They feel entitled to your love

This hypocrisy is exactly what makes them poisonous.

Hold the mindset that it is not your job to become lovable through being useful. This idea sets you down a self-destructive path of learning to over-function to “earn your way” through life.

Over functioning is a form of self-neglect. A pattern that can be more easily overcome by setting the necessary boundaries on those who demand your usefulness.

Author: GreatCosmicMothersUnited

I have joined with many parents affected with the surreal , yet accepted issue of child abuse via Pathogenic Parenting / Domestic abuse. As a survivor of Domestic Abuse, denial abounded that 3 sons were not affected. In my desire to be family to those who have found me lacking . As a survivor of psychiatric abuse, therapist who abused also and toxic prescribed medications took me to hell on earth with few moments of heaven. I will share my life, my experiences and my studies and research.. I will talk to small circles and I will council ; as targeted parents , grandparents , aunts , uncles etc. , are denied contact with a child for reasons that serve the abuser ...further abusing the child. I grasp the trauma and I have looked at the lost connection to a higher power.. I grasp when one is accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like discrimination.. Shame and affluence silences a lot of facts , truths that have been labeled "negative". It is about liberation of the soul from projections of a alienator , and abuser ..

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