Narcissists teach us many things, most of which are harmful and soul-crushing.
These are things that are difficult to accept if you’ve always wanted to see the good in people and give them the benefit of the doubt.
But, to survive in the world today, we must accept and internalize these things if we want to maintain dominion over our lives.
1 – Love doesn’t always conquer all.
Thanks to Hollywood and various novels, we may have grown up believing love can conquer anything. Narcissists teach us that this isn’t true. As painful as it feels, we must learn when to walk away from something or someone that is damaging to our well-being. We must know when to let go.
2 – Heartless people exist.
The thing I hear most often? “I can’t believe there are people like this!”
There are a LOT of heartless, cruel, and evil people in the world. It’s essential to accept this in order to create effective boundaries for ourselves and our relationships.
3 – Never try to raise an adult.
We are not here to care for grown adults as if they were our minor children. When we try to fix another individual, their problems, or influence their path, we are allowing them to avoid facing the consequences of their decisions and actions. What’s more, we’re not even helping ourselves out; we’re just taking on extra baggage.
4 – Even God can’t change them.
It’s a common response for folks to chime in and say that God can change narcissists. I’ve been in this field for ten years now and haven’t once seen that happen. Further, millions of people have stopped by my blog, and none of those folks have seen it happen either, nor have my many colleagues in mental health.
I’m not talking about the act that many narcissists put on where pretend to have had The Divine Epiphany and suddenly turn into congregation member of the year. If you’re dealing with a narcissist, this is always an act.
5 – You are strong.
If you’ve managed to survive a relationship with a narcissist, you are one of the strongest people alive. If you survived a relationship with a narcissist, you can do ANYTHING.
Your friend on the journey. xo ❤️