Alienation isn’t forever. I will explain by defining the word ‘alienation’ which is part of the term ‘parental alienation’. Alienation refers to a state of feeling disconnected, estranged, or isolated from others or from oneself. It describes the loss of our children from our lives and from how we used to be with them. It is a loss which has been manipulated by a vengeful ex (or others). But we have the ability to shift our perception and understanding of a situation, allowing us to view it from a different angle or with a new mindset. By doing so, we can alleviate feelings of alienation by fostering a sense of connection, empathy, and understanding, both with others and with ourselves. Hopefully it will be with our children again. In many cases, it is so. But it helps to make this shift regardless. We can still feel we belong, feel connections, love and be loved. While the children are not in our lives, it is important to fill our days, fill the void, and strive to be happy.
Alienation can feel like it lasts forever. I will explain by defining the word ‘alienation’, which is part of the term ‘parental alienation’. Alienation refers to a state of being cut off, disconnected, or isolated from others or even from oneself. It’s not just the loss of our children from our lives; it’s the deliberate destruction of the bond we once shared—a loss created through manipulation by a vengeful ex or others (enablers, including the family court and mental health establishment). This grief is often compounded by deep feelings of rejection, helplessness, and disbelief that such a severing could be engineered. But it’s important to remember that while the alienating parent may keep trying to provoke us—using every reaction as proof against us—the most powerful response is to refuse to remain stuck in anger and grief. (I know it’s not easy, having been through it myself, and even as a coach, it had a huge impact on my life).
The pain of this forced separation is overwhelming, and it’s easy to be trapped in cycles of anguish or reactive anger. But healing is not only for our own survival; it’s a necessity if we’re ever to reconnect with our children. By shifting our perception and rebuilding our sense of self, we can lessen the grip of alienation over our lives. The more we choose to heal, the more we undermine the alienating parent’s portrayal of us as “broken” or “dangerous.” We show our children that, while we’ve been deeply wounded, we are strong, resilient, and capable of offering them the stable and loving parent they were made to believe no longer exists.
So while they’re not in our lives, we must work to live as fully as we can—finding ways to fill the emptiness and rediscover joy. If our lives are consumed by bitterness, it becomes easy for our children to see us only through the distorted lens of the alienating parent’s propaganda. But when we commit to healing and refuse to let the pain define us, we send a message that no manipulation can erase: that we are still here, whole, and ready to rebuild a loving relationship whenever they find their way back to us. Our happiness and peace, even in their absence, are the most profound gifts we can give—whether they are near or far.
#charliemccready
#parentalalienationcoach
#parentalalienation
#parentalalienationawareness
#FamilyCourt
#mothersmatter
#FathersMatter
#healing
#traumabond
#custody
GreatCosmicMothersUnite 