Keep it in mind that a person who is benefitting from being with you will never tell you to your face: ‘I don’t really love you, and I don’t see a future with you. But I don’t mind keeping you around for all the wonderful things you bring to my life. The way you help me make better decisions and shape my life. The way you keep me focused and inspire me. The way you assist me financially. The way you give me emotional and sexual warmth.’
Do not wait for this person to ever admit, ‘Honestly I feel lucky to get someone so richly resourceful yet so naive. They trust me for nothing and camp with me while time passes them by. The doors are open, and as soon as I find whom I truly want, I’ll just move on. But you decide to risk everything to be with me. Maybe you’re content with the little I give. But if I were you, I’d do better for myself.’
You will escort this type of person for two, ten, or twenty years, and they will still go away to the life they want.
And they’ll still slap you with the insult, ‘I never asked you to.’
You did all that for me, but it was your choice. You could have chosen differently if you wanted.’
I hope you don’t mistake patience for wasting your time.
Waiting on the wrong person is wasting your time.
Banking on someone who isn’t giving you evidence of honesty is wasting your time.
Investing more and more into a relationship doesn’t make it stronger if you’re the only one who is investing.
There comes a time in life to put yourself first and work with your own schedule in life.
If you can’t afford years of suspense and delay, neither can you afford to hang around with people who aren’t sure about you or where the relationship is going.
(©️ Benjamin Zulu Global)
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