Our Perpetrating family members have zero ability to regulate their emotions. This is why they yell, berate, rage, become passive aggressive and stonewall when they are met with differences of opinions, ideas or boundaries. They believe they are totally entitled to abuse us in any way they want.
Our family members don’t consider regulating their emotion because they don’t care how they make other people feel.
Emotionally healthy people, on the other hand, put a great deal of effort into regulating their emotions for the goal of having productive and meaningful conversations. When met with boundaries healthy people seek to understand, they are happy to make whatever changes are necessary in themselves and are mature enough to agree to disagree.
Emotionally abusive relationships bring chaos and heathy relationships bring peace. The mindset to hold is to always choose people who bring you more peace than problems.
I have joined with many parents affected with the surreal , yet accepted issue of child abuse via Pathogenic Parenting / Domestic abuse.
As a survivor of Domestic Abuse, denial abounded that 3 sons were not affected. In my
desire to be family to those who have found me lacking . As a survivor of psychiatric abuse, therapist who abused also and toxic prescribed medications took me to hell on earth with few moments of heaven.
I will share my life, my experiences and my studies and research.. I will talk to small circles and I will council ; as targeted parents , grandparents , aunts , uncles etc. , are
denied contact with a child for reasons that serve the abuser ...further abusing the child.
I grasp the trauma and I have looked at the lost connection to a higher power..
I grasp when one is accustomed to privilege, equality can feel like discrimination..
Shame and affluence silences a lot of facts , truths that have been labeled "negative".
It is about liberation of the soul from projections of a alienator , and abuser ..
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