“Alas for those that never sing, but die with all their music inside them.” ~Oliver Wendell Holmes – The Voiceless
I may be too truthful , too much for some… I have been shunned by a society that ignored the red flags of abuse , or were too busy .
I lost my music , I lost my way , I lost the trust , respect and faith of our children, and will never .know our grandchildren.. I lost myself , that self that tried to keep up , in a world I did not belong in… devoid of truth , of a true partnership , of fidelity, of honor and I waited way too long for change that never came… it only got worse ..
Psychiatry has failed many families, erasing the very fabric of unity with their mind, soul and body addictive , and often toxic medications and I promised myself, our children / grandchildren the truth . After years of delays , years of challenges , the time has come.
I sing, not as the “ fat lady “ sings … but as the wounded warrior , who still hears the music , still tears up , still has chills with certain music , and who dares to dream of speaking up for those whose voices have been stilled, muted , or no longer with us ..
Healing is multi faceted , and laughing / crying are the same release and I am not ashamed I lost my way.. I am extremely invested in openly relating the gravity of the varied side effects that accompany prescriptive medications , that adversely impact families , altering an individual to the point of not knowing, of not being heard and being disposed of..
It was with great joy , that I discovered music upon waking , and made it part of my therapy , tailored to aide in releasing emotion privately , divesting me of anger , rage and grief at the travesty of losing our family ..
Divorce happens , we grow together , or we grow apart .. an uninterested partner, counter parenting instead of cooperation, gave way to extracting himself , and making me responsible for the downfall of our family . It was very painful to not have anyone in my corner , no support , the wrong medical professionals who were not interested either.
Learning about trauma, healing trauma , knowing I have been very blessed to experience profound trauma at the behest of a bottom feeder , who presented to be legit in business matters , proved to me that I am safe , and protected from such primal greediness, and accepting that after several decades , I will enjoy the serenity of my own home , where music and dance will be normal , everyday , respite from a world in flux, in change , in a spiritual war for many .. my faith in tact , my joy intact , I celebrate , and am Thankful for my journey ..
Music is and shall always be a major part of my life , and I Thank the music makers , the poets , that enrich my life and wish that for everyone …
Music makes all well with my soul 🫶🏼🎹🎷🎺🎸🎻🥁
